DREB CHAPTER 89

The moment Lu Zerui said it, he realized what he’d just called Li Yan. Feeling nervous, he glanced quickly at him. But Li Yan lowered his head and brushed the dirt around the cabbage without saying anything.

What the boy didn’t see was that Li Yan’s hands were trembling slightly. Lu Zerui pursed his lips, feeling a mix of relief and quiet disappointment.

He’d been careful not to call Li Yan “mom” because he knew Li Yan didn’t want to be his mother.

Since the cabbage’s head had been damaged, Li Yan peeled off the broken parts and brought it inside. That evening, he made a cabbage and tofu dish.

During dinner, Lu Zerui seemed downcast, eating only a little before heading outside to kick pebbles. He stayed out until late, finally coming back when Li Yan called for him.

Seeing him like this, Li Yan wondered if Lu Zerui had grown tired of staying here. After all, this place couldn’t compare to bustling City A, with its playgrounds and shopping malls full of toys for him to choose from.

One weekend night, Li Yan sent Lu Zerui back early. The boy was sullen the entire trip, refusing to speak to him.

Li Yan didn’t understand what had upset him and felt helpless.

When they arrived at the Lu family residence, Li Yan asked the security guard to notify them. As the familiar butler approached, Li Yan turned and walked away.

It was already dark by the time he left. Before he could reach the station, Lu Lianning suddenly appeared.

His car followed behind with the headlights on. After a moment, he pulled up beside Li Yan, rolled down the window, and said, “Get in. I’ll give you a ride.”

Li Yan didn’t want to and kept walking with his head down.

Lu Lianning persisted, “I’m going that way anyway. You’ll miss the last bus by the time you reach the station.”

He continued, “By taking my car, you’ll save the bus fare, right?”

“Might as well.”

“You can sit in the back seat. If you don’t want to talk, that’s fine. I’m just going the same way…”

He rambled on until Li Yan reached the station, only to find the last bus tickets sold out. When he walked back outside, Lu Lianning was still there, holding the back door open. After a moment of hesitation, Li Yan got in.

He was polite, saying, “Thank you,” as if Lu Lianning were simply a kind driver offering a free ride.

But they both knew that wasn’t the case.

The three-and-a-half-hour journey stretched to five hours, yet they still hadn’t reached the destination.

Lu Lianning, his expression unchanged, had driven around the outskirts of Wujingwan Town three times, deliberately avoiding the direct route to savor more time alone with Li Yan.

In the confined space of the car, Lu Lianning stole frequent glances at Li Yan in the rearview mirror.

Finally, Li Yan couldn’t sit still any longer.

“How about I just get out and walk?” He wasn’t joking, his hand already on the door handle as if prepared to jump out at any moment.

Lu Lianning awkwardly cleared his throat. “We’ll be there in ten minutes.”

He dropped Li Yan off at the front door and followed him. But as they reached the entrance, Li Yan suddenly stopped.

He opened the door, stepped inside, and then turned to find Lu Lianning lingering outside, his hand holding the doorframe as if to prevent Li Yan from closing it.

Time had been kind to this man. His once youthful features had faded, replaced by a more mature and reserved look. His eyes were deeper, his eyelashes thick, his nose straight, and his skin a cool white. Even without a smile, the curve of his lips retained its captivating allure.

Lu Lianning’s appearance had always been strikingly aggressive—impossible to ignore. In the past, he had often played up this trait in front of Li Yan.

Now, though he seemed to be restraining himself, his intent was clearly to make Li Yan less resistant toward him. However, it was evident that he still hadn’t figured out how to achieve that.

Li Yan glanced at Lu Lianning’s hand on the door and lowered his gaze. Finally, he asked, sounding weary, “What exactly are you trying to do?”

Lu Lianning considered his words carefully, glancing at Li Yan, afraid he might run out of patience at any moment.

He said, “I’m really trying to change. Would you consider being with me?” He watched Li Yan’s face. “You don’t have to decide now. Take your time if you need to. There’s no rush.”

Li Yan’s gaze shifted back to Lu Lianning’s face as he heard those words.

Consider being with him?

Why was Lu Lianning still like this after five years?

They had barely been together a year and a half, and yet they seemed destined to be entangled for decades without truly letting go.

What kind of person was Lu Lianning?

Not a normal person, surely. Just look at all he had done in the past. A man like that should have been committed to a mental hospital, yet here he was—a well-behaved five-year-old child in his care and now standing in front of Li Yan, whose body was frail and mind unstable.

Talking about being together.

Li Yan thought to himself: How lucky he is.

He thought it, but somehow the words slipped out aloud, carrying a vague meaning. Lu Lianning, however, took it as a sign of reconciliation.

He stared at Li Yan in disbelief, his hand slowly sliding down from the doorframe. “Really… is it true? Am I really lucky?”

Just as he stepped forward to hug Li Yan, the door slammed shut in his face with a loud “bang.”

Through the door, Li Yan’s voice was still clear as he said, “Lu Lianning, we’re not right for each other.”

For a brief moment, Lu Lianning’s heart soared, only to be violently thrown back down, leaving him on the verge of breaking down. He took a few deep breaths and called out Li Yan’s name, but when he opened his mouth, he found he didn’t know what to say.

It felt as though he hadn’t made any progress, even though he had promised Li Yan he was trying to change.

In these past three months, he had broken Li Yan’s door and even kicked over the cabbage Li Yan had worked so hard to grow. Nothing he had done was enough to make Li Yan soften or feel anything for him.

If Li Yan said they weren’t right for each other, he must have truly meant it.

Lu Lianning lowered his head, his thoughts drifting to Li Yan’s ex-wife, Chen Yaxin. He had investigated so many aspects of Li Yan’s life, hoping to hold onto him, so of course, he couldn’t ignore such an important person.

While he could still find fault with Chen Yu, there was nothing he could criticize about Chen Yaxin—the gentle, kind, and beautiful woman his investigations had revealed.

Even the dogs at the village entrance wouldn’t bark twice at someone like her.

Compared to Li Yan’s choice of a spouse, Lu Lianning realized he didn’t measure up in any way.

He wasn’t gentle or kind, and neither was his love. It was full of possessiveness and control, always greedy, always demanding more.

To Li Yan, someone like him must seem entirely unworthy of love.

He wasn’t even the right gender.

Suddenly, Lu Lianning was overwhelmed by a crushing sense of inferiority. Helplessly, he called to Li Yan behind the door, “Even Zerui’s kindergarten teacher says gender equality is for everyone.”

He added, “Li Yan, how can you be like this?”

Inside, Li Yan felt a deep sense of grievance hearing his words.

See? He was lying again.

He would never change. He still clung to his twisted love, forcing it in front of Li Yan a thousand times over.

He still loved in that self-righteous, condescending way.

Even now, as he tried to suppress his temper and cover his sharp edges with a fresh coat of gentleness.

But it was too fresh.

It couldn’t hide what lay underneath.