Chapter 51: Death Follows Like a Shadow, None of My Loved Ones Are Left
Now that things have come to this point, what else can be done?
The first thing Jiang Xiaoyuan did after snapping out of her daze was to drag Jiang Bo to a nearby “convenience” breakfast shop: “Two bowls of wontons.”
Jiang Bo, the young master, glanced at the yellowish plastic bowls and said, “I want something dry. I don’t want to use their bowls for soup.”
Jiang Xiaoyuan rolled her eyes dramatically and made the decision herself: “One bowl of wontons, and give him two sesame seed cakes.”
The yawning waiter strolled over lazily, half-dead as they spoke: “The meat-filled sesame cakes are one yuan and twenty cents each, and the salt and pepper ones are eighty cents. Which do you want?”
Without hesitation, Jiang Xiaoyuan replied: “Salt and pepper!”
Jiang Bo: “…”
This earth-shaking rebellion caught Mr. Jiang off guard, and Jiang Bo, who hadn’t reacted for a moment, pondered quietly: “Jiang Xiaoyuan, have you gone mad?”
Jiang Xiaoyuan had all sorts of wild ideas swirling in her head. On her way to the studio that morning, she had been thinking about her future plans.
Once the studio’s preliminary work was settled, she would follow Mr. Jiang abroad for further study. After three to four months, she would return just in time to take the advanced makeup artist exam next year. Once she obtained her professional qualification, the studio would be on track. They could expand while hiring more people… and maybe even dabble in cosmetic purchasing. Once the purchasing platform matured, they could launch their own products.
In ten years, maybe eight, she believed that if she put in the effort, she could carve out a name for herself.
But now, all those dreams were utterly crushed by the words “no money.” Jiang Xiaoyuan felt like her dreams of conquering Asia had suddenly morphed into a daydream, shattered into pieces. Still, she refused to let her ambition for becoming the best in Asia go to waste. She angrily adjusted her future plans while viciously biting into the freshly made wonton.
… The roots of her teeth are numbed by the burn.
Jiang Xiaoyuan thought that money wasn’t the most important thing right now. If push came to shove, she could always borrow some. The most important things were resources and reputation. The competition in this industry was intense—how could she build up a reputation and network?
It had become clear that Jiang Xiaoyuan was a complete novice when it came to marketing. Handing out flyers on the street was a waste of effort—first, no one would look at them; second, she hadn’t clearly defined her target audience…
Although Jiang Bo was full of complaints, when the sesame cakes arrived, he didn’t say anything. He took a bite and said with self-deprecation, “I never thought I’d eat a breakfast worth one yuan and sixty cents in this lifetime.”
Jiang Xiaoyuan, busy editing out her unreliable marketing strategies from her head, casually replied, “When I was filthy rich, I never thought I’d end up handing out flyers on the street.”
Jiang Bo was momentarily stunned.
Jiang Xiaoyuan realized she’d said too much and quickly changed her tone: “Just kidding. I was only rich in my dreams.”
She had a demure, elegant face, but in private, she was known to talk wildly among those close to her. Jiang Bo didn’t take her words to heart. Instead, he picked up on her mention of handing out flyers and said: “It’s not that bad. Things will work out. Sure, a lot of my big clients are connected to her, but I didn’t coast all these years for nothing. Even if it’s just favors, I still have some resources. Big clients may be difficult for now, but if I lower my prices a bit, I can still get gigs with lesser-known, small-time artists.”
Jiang Xiaoyuan muttered an unenthusiastic “Mm.”
Jiang Bo: “As for the money problem, didn’t you say there are investors?”
Her mind tangled with confusion, Jiang Xiaoyuan, eager to find a new path, replied irritably, “First, you have to come up with something that clearly makes money before you shamelessly approach investors. What are we doing now, looking for charity? Besides, I don’t trust you. The investor is my friend—I can’t afford to swindle him.”
Jiang Bo, expressionless, waved the sesame cake in his hand: “Why didn’t you ever worry about swindling me?”
Jiang Xiaoyuan remained unfazed: “Because my friend is better looking than you.”
Jiang Bo: “…”
Lowering her head, Jiang Xiaoyuan stirred the scalding hot soup, lightly blowing on the wontons to cool them before she sullenly started eating with a depressed heart.
She had very refined eating habits—elegant and composed. No matter how hungry she was, she never wolfed down her food. She never spoke with her mouth full, and she sat with proper posture. She didn’t smack her lips, push food around, or scrape the bottom of the bowl—none of those bad habits.
Even the leftover food looked neatly arranged and not at all unpleasant. The remaining soup was so clean that someone who didn’t know better might have just drunk it straight.
Even if she could only afford roadside food like this, Jiang Xiaoyuan could carry herself with dignity in any setting.
If Jiang Bo didn’t know her well, he might have been fooled into thinking she was a young lady raised with a lot of money.
Suddenly, Jiang Bo couldn’t help but say: “Actually, she’s right. With your skills, joining an established studio might be promising. That way, you’d have stability, less stress, and plenty of free time.”
Youth is fleeting. Whether it’s spent surrounded by beauty or hustling through hardships, time passes all the same.
Jiang Bo lowered his eyes, looking at Jiang Xiaoyuan with a soft expression. “You could go out with your girlfriends, have meals, watch movies, or even find someone reliable to fall in love with. Wouldn’t that be nice?”
Jiang Xiaoyuan’s nascent idea was cut off by his nonchalant suggestion. She shot back, annoyed, “Don’t talk nonsense.”
Jiang Bo pulled a chopstick from the table and lightly knocked her: “Speak properly.”
Jiang Xiaoyuan ignored his irrelevant musings and forcefully dragged the conversation back on track: “I have an idea. Tell me if it’s viable—what do you think about starting with internet marketing? Since we can’t get in touch with the big clients, let’s begin by building a brand. If money is tight, we can scrap the trip to the U.S. for now. It’s not like we won’t have the opportunity later… I’m thinking internet marketing has unlimited potential, but the downside is we’d have to hustle like freelance photographers, and the profits would be low in the beginning. Should we also consider doing some wedding-related business? You wouldn’t have to handle it personally—we could hire interns from local schools.”
Jiang Bo thought for a moment. “If you’re only after fame, there’s always the option to participate in a competition later on.”
Jiang Xiaoyuan paused, startled: “What competition?”
Jiang Bo sighed, feeling like his little assistant was clueless. “There are national competitions in the styling industry—some focus on weddings, others on film themes. Each year, they invite representatives from film and television companies. For a stylist, it’s a great opportunity if you can stand out.”
Jiang Xiaoyuan seemed to ignore his last sentence entirely. Her eyes lit up with excitement, like a thousand suns bursting into a blaze, brightening the entire breakfast shop. “What? How do I enter? How did I never hear about this before… Why didn’t you mention it sooner?!”
Jiang Bo lowered his head and bit into his sesame cake.
A sesame cake is an unassuming thing, speckled with sesame seeds and often charred around the edges. Encountering one on the street usually doesn’t stir any appetite. Only after taking a bite can you tell if it’s good or not—and this one was undeniably hot, crispy, and held an unexplainable toasted aroma.
Much like Jiang Xiaoyuan. She wasn’t plain-looking, but there was a fragile air about her, like she couldn’t weather a storm. She lacked basic knowledge and far from meticulous in her work—neither luck nor skill seemed to be on her side.
Jiang Bo never imagined they’d get this far together.
“Why?” he wondered, “Is it because she’s more daring than anyone else?”
Just as Jiang Bo took out his wallet to pay, Jiang Xiaoyuan suddenly said, “Going out to eat, shop, watch movies, or fall in love sounds nice, but something’s missing.”
Apparently, she had heard his earlier question. Jiang Bo seriously asked, “What’s missing?”
“Freedom,” Jiang Xiaoyuan replied.
Jiang Bo was taken aback, “Isn’t it me who doesn’t have freedom? How are you not free? Who is in charge of you?”
Jiang Xiaoyuan neatly placed the used spoon onto the tray. “No one has to restrict you directly. For example, if you’re struggling in life, and your parents or relatives call to say, ‘Look at the state you’re in—why keep struggling? Do you want to drive your parents to an early grave? Come home and get married! Don’t you know you should stay close when your parents are alive?’ After hearing that, wouldn’t it seem unreasonable to refuse and not go home? Of course, this is just an example. My parents are no longer around.”
After speaking, Jiang Xiaoyuan suddenly remembered that Jiang Bo’s parents were also gone, so she frowned and changed her approach: “For instance, when you go shopping and dining with friends, if you’re the one treating, you can order whatever you like. But if someone else is treating, besides ordering your favorites, you also have to consider whether the meal is too expensive—this is also a kind of limitation, isn’t it? If there are limitations, then there’s no freedom. And if someone really suffers a big loss because they want to help you, how do you repay that favor later?”
As Jiang Xiaoyuan said this, she sighed, seemingly speaking from the heart: “If it’s a stranger, you might like them today and dislike them a few days later. Then you can just clarify things and leave it aside, and everyone can part on good terms. Liking or disliking them is straightforward. But when emotions get mixed in, when you like someone, it becomes intertwined with gratitude and flattery. It’s no longer pure liking. When you don’t like them anymore, you also lose the freedom to not like them… I always feel that this is particularly uncomfortable, but looking around, it seems that everyone else doesn’t think so.”
Sitting alone on the bench in the small restaurant, she suddenly felt a twinge of loneliness.
“Why don’t others have so many concerns?” Jiang Xiaoyuan wondered. “Maybe it’s because I take myself too seriously? I’ve been spoiled over there before.”
After listening to her, Jiang Bo mulled over it for a long time: “Oh, I think I understand a bit now.”
Jiang Xiaoyuan blinked, somewhat hoping for his comfort.
Jiang Bo: “So you mean to say that if you like someone, you can’t accept their favors. No wonder I said you should find investors… ah!”
Jiang Xiaoyuan kicked him under the table.
Jiang Bo’s long, slender eyebrows nearly shot off his face in disbelief:“You actually dared to kick your boss?!”
Jiang Xiaoyuan: “You dangle some vague shares in front of me, make me do the work of eight people while cutting my salary, and you still have the nerve to call yourself ‘boss’?”
Jiang Bo: “…”
At that moment, he understood what Jiang Xiaoyuan meant by “no freedom”—there was no way to argue against her words, so he could only awkwardly close his mouth.
That night, Jiang Xiaoyuan commandeered Jiang Bo’s computer to register a “Nirvana” studio blue V Weibo account[mfn]Once a user is verified in Weibo, a colorful V is appended to their username; individuals receive an orange V, while organizations and companies receive a blue V.[/mfn]. She then spent over four hours doing her makeup for a date, writing a long and somewhat tedious makeup tutorial with pictures, as well as tips and prohibitions on outfit coordination. Finally, she added a few stirring concluding remarks.
When she finished, it was already past midnight. Jiang Xiaoyuan, still adorned in her full makeup, rushed to wash her face and shamelessly tagged a bunch of beauty-related big accounts.
After waiting for over half an hour with no replies or retweets, Jiang Xiaoyuan’s eyelids nearly glued together from her mascara, and she had no choice but to get up like a dead dog, wash her face, and flop onto her bed, realizing that “internet marketing” wasn’t so easy for a novice like her.
Before going to sleep, she habitually glanced at her phone and saw Qi Lian’s timely greeting message, as punctual as dawn and dusk: “How is the preparation for your studio going?”
Jiang Xiaoyuan replied brazenly: “The preliminary work is progressing smoothly, so future investors can rest assured.”
After sending this message, it felt like she had completed the final ritual of the day, and she quickly fell asleep on her pillow.
Jiang Xiaoyuan slept for less than four hours before being awakened by a phone call.
Groggily, she got up and saw it was a call from her hometown—older people in the countryside have such crazy habits of sleeping early and waking up early. Every time her grandmother contacted her, Jiang Xiaoyuan painfully felt like she had just lain down.
Like a wandering ghost, she crawled up, grabbed a cup of water, and managed to finish the call, making incoherent sounds. Five minutes later, she was fully awake.
Her grandmother had called not only to ask about her recent situation but also to share some news—her sixth great-uncle had passed away, and her grandmother would represent the older generation at the funeral.
What kind of relative is a sixth great-uncle? Jiang Xiaoyuan had no idea, but she understood her grandmother’s meaning.
An elderly woman, watching her peers pass away one by one, going from door to door helping others mourn—what kind of feeling must that be?
Death was ever-present, and none of her relatives were left.
Her grandmother was scared.
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