FIG CHAPTER 9

Zhu Lianzhen tugged at the hem of his shirt and muttered, “I heard getting it removed hurts, so I can’t be bothered. I can’t see it anyway.”

Out of sight, out of mind.

Noticing Tan Qing’s calm gaze from the corner of his eye, Zhu Lianzhen suddenly felt a little less confident. “I’m going to sleep. If there’s anything, let’s talk tomorrow.”

Tan Qing stepped back half a step. “Good night, then.”

After closing the door, Zhu Lianzhen comforted himself: At least no one else than Tan Qing saw it. It could be considered a close call, at most.

On the other hand, he still didn’t understand what kind of emotion was behind that “It’s still there.” One would only say that if they assumed it was gone, right? If Tan Qing thought his tattoo wasn’t there anymore, then what about his own? Was his already gone?

Had Tan Qing made up his mind about it earlier than he had?

Zhu Lianzhen stood there for a while, moved his stiff neck, and forced himself to stop dwelling on such pointless thoughts.

As dawn broke, the pale sky merged with the mottled clouds into a heavy greyish blue.

On a rare day off, Zhu Lianzhen went home to grab a few things. While he was driving, Ah-Xu complained that stalker fans had been showing up more frequently lately and refused to leave no matter what.

Seeing Zhu Lianzhen not responding much, Ah-Xu added, “Sorry, I shouldn’t have brought that up.”

Zhu Lianzhen: “What? I was just thinking about something else and didn’t really hear you.”

Ah-Xu looked relieved. “That’s good. I thought I accidentally poked at some emotional scar.”

“…Huh?” Zhu Lianzhen frowned. “No clue what you’re talking about.”

“You said before that you and Tan Qing were secretly photographed, right? If I were you, I’d move houses every time I saw a stalker.”

Zhu Lianzhen clicked his tongue dismissively. “So we got secretly photographed—why should I restrict myself just because someone else crossed the line? Even if I could do it all over again, I’d still kiss when I should’ve kissed. It’s not like it’s illegal.”

He just wanted to express that he wouldn’t be swayed by outside forces, but Ah-Xu fixated on a different part of the sentence. “So back then, you were the one who kissed Tan Qing?”

“No,” Zhu Lianzhen was about to deny it, but he couldn’t be sure of his memory. “Who remembers that kind of detail? I just said it without thinking!”

Ah-Xu whistled teasingly. “Oooh—”

Zhu Lianzhen felt like his scalp was going to explode. “So annoying!”

The next day, Acemon’s custom-made stage outfits arrived. With black as the main color and intricate detailing, the outfits gave off a dark, edgy aura. The members shot exclusive photos for the physical release of “Shake.” The photographer shadowed them for most of the day, capturing tons of material for them to pick their favorites from.

Dozens of photos were laid out across the dance studio floor, making their eyes blur. Koty agonized over the choices—he looked way too handsome, and picking just three wasn’t nearly enough.

While still choosing, he was distracted by one of Fu Rong’s nearby photos and couldn’t help but pick it up to admire it. Fu Rong’s skin tone was a classic cool white. Each of his facial features looked indifferent and sharp when viewed individually, but together, they gave off a sense of noble beauty. Wearing the black stage outfit only enhanced his aloof, otherworldly aura.

After examining it for a moment, Koty reluctantly put the photo back. As everyone gradually finished selecting their shots, the staff came to collect all the sample prints. Koty asked, “What’s the point of collecting them?”

“No point—just to prevent any materials from leaking early. We have to keep them secure for now.”

Koty said, “Then let us keep them ourselves. We won’t show them to anyone.”

The staff immediately gave Koty a “You, seriously?” kind of doubtful look.

Around mealtime, Zhu Lianzhen noticed Koty sneaking off suspiciously toward a part of the building he didn’t usually visit. Guessing he was probably up to something shady, Zhu Lianzhen decisively followed—partly to get back at him for pestering him about the tattoo the other day.

Koty didn’t mind being followed at all. Instead, he confessed without hesitation, “You’re here to steal the photos too?”

“What do you even want those for?”

“We shot so many sets, but in the end, they’ll only release three. The rest will just sit locked in a cabinet—totally wasted. Might as well keep some for ourselves.”

Zhu Lianzhen thought that made sense. His mom had even called recently to complain about how hard it was to look through his photos. Nowadays, with everything stored on cloud drives, there was none of that warm feeling of the whole family sitting together flipping through a photo album like before.

He said, “I’ll take some too. For my mom.”

Acemon had a dedicated archive room at the company. When they got to the door, they found it locked. Zhu Lianzhen sighed, “Wasted trip. Forget it.”

“Relax, I came prepared.” Koty smoothly patted his pocket and pulled out a set of keys he’d borrowed in advance. He found the right one and slipped it into the lock, turning the handle.

The two of them went in and quickly found the stack of photos from earlier. Koty moved like he was shuffling a deck of cards, swiftly picking out Fu Rong’s shots and stuffing them into his pocket.

Zhu Lianzhen: “So you were planning to steal someone else’s? You pervert!”

“Come on, hurry up. If someone comes in, we’ll get scolded,” Koty reminded him. “I’ll wait by the door and keep watch.”

“Don’t act like we’re actual thieves, will you? So what if we get caught?” Zhu Lianzhen rummaged through the pile but couldn’t find any of his own, so he gave up. While putting the dozens of photos back in order, he caught sight of one of Tan Qing’s expressions and paused, picking it up for a closer look.

Zhu Lianzhen remembered the scene when that photo was taken. At the time, a staff member had been pushing a prop cart past them when one of the wheels got stuck, causing everything on the cart to topple over. Everyone nearby had been startled. Tan Qing’s expression in the photo captured a bit of that surprise, with his head slightly tilted, eyes widened, staring at something.

It was rare to see Tan Qing looking so startled. Zhu Lianzhen found it refreshing and couldn’t help but look at the photo a few more times.

Koty urged him again from the doorway. Zhu Lianzhen hesitated, but in the end, thinking “I’m already here, might as well not leave empty-handed,” he slipped Tan Qing’s photo into his pocket, as if guided by some unseen force—planning to bring it back and show him.

On the way back, Zhu Lianzhen came to his senses and was suddenly hit with a wave of embarrassment. Was I possessed just now? Why did I even take this?

It had to be Koty’s bad influence.

Back at the hotel buffet, the other three were nearly done eating. Zhu Lianzhen sat down, and Tan Qing handed him a dessert plate. “The waiter said they ran out of macaron ingredients, so they could only save you one.”

Zhu Lianzhen felt so guilty he couldn’t even look Tan Qing in the eye. He took the plate and reflexively muttered, “Thank you.”

Tan Qing looked at him quietly.

Zhu Lianzhen suddenly realized he had spaced out. Normally, he wouldn’t be that polite with Tan Qing during casual conversation.

After Fu Rong finished eating and left, Koty finally dared to pull out the stolen photos and stash them in his bag. Ji Yunting noticed and said with disdain, “So that’s what you two disappeared for—doing shady stuff like that.”

Zhu Lianzhen quickly distanced himself from the situation. “I didn’t take Fu Rong’s! I just wanted to get mine to give to my mom, but I couldn’t even find it in the end.”

“You want yours? I have them,” Tan Qing said, reaching into his coat pocket. Zhu Lianzhen watched as he pulled out a whole stack of his photos, so many they could’ve been used as a fan.

Zhu Lianzhen was stunned. When did he grab those? And here he was, feeling guilty for taking just one of Tan Qing’s, while the guy had snatched an entire stack of his.

“I told the staff I wanted to give them to Tan Xiao. Promised I wouldn’t leak them online, so they handed them over,” Tan Qing explained calmly.

Koty was dumbfounded. “Why are you so good at convincing people?”

Zhu Lianzhen recognized the name. “Tan Xiao—that’s your little sister, right? What does she want these for?”

“She’s been your fan for a long time. She even came to one of our concerts before.” Tan Qing handed the photos to Zhu Lianzhen. “Since you want to give them to your mom, I won’t keep them.”

“Ah, it’s whatever. You can keep them,” Zhu Lianzhen simply treated it like a fair trade. After all, he had sneakily taken one of Tan Qing’s without any legitimate reason, so he couldn’t help feeling a bit guilty.

He even signed one of the photos for Tan Xiao and asked Tan Qing to pass it along to her.

–

After returning home, Ah-Xu helped Zhu Lianzhen organize the items in his bag and came across Tan Qing’s photo.

Her expression turned complicated. “You’re gay, right?”

Zhu Lianzhen replied nonchalantly, “I’ve been thinking of practicing darts lately—just collecting some targets first.”

Ah-Xu was skeptical. “And it has to be Tan Qing’s face as the target?”

Zhu Lianzhen flatly denied it. “No!”

Ah-Xu nodded knowingly. “So you are gay.”

Zhu Lianzhen gritted his teeth. “I’m not!”

He wasn’t one of those “homophobic because they’re secretly gay” types. There was nothing shameful about being gay. The problem was, he genuinely wasn’t interested in men. It was just that Tan Qing had somehow become a bizarre exception, so saying he was gay didn’t quite reflect the truth.

Logically speaking, there was no reason for him to develop feelings for Tan Qing. But back then, they were young—two impulsive boys who’d never been in love, suddenly thrown into the world of “CP fanservice,” a job that quickly became inseparable from their daily lives. Over time, constant exposure blurred the lines.

The cheers from fans, the company’s arrangements, the confusion of adolescence, and their natural chemistry… all kinds of factors created an ambiguous atmosphere that pushed them from ordinary friendship into something else.

It was probably a case of two straight guys unintentionally turning each other gay.

They truly liked each other, but in their youthful naivety, they mistook that affection, born from friendship and performance, for romantic love. That unspoken sense of secrecy always tugged at his heart, but once they actually stepped into a real relationship, the complications gradually dissolved the fantasy.

There had always been an invisible distance between them. Zhu Lianzhen could feel it, and he believed Tan Qing could too.

Tan Qing had almost never confided any negative emotions to him. Whenever conflicts arose, it was always Zhu Lianzhen venting while Tan Qing quietly absorbed it all without complaint. The reverse had never happened, and Zhu Lianzhen couldn’t even imagine what Tan Qing looked like when he was angry.

So for a long time, he ignored the basic truth that “everyone has emotions.” He simply assumed Tan Qing had such a good temperament that he never responded negatively.

By the time he finally realized the truth that “Tan Qing never opened up to me,” the trust between them had already begun to erode.

That was why, when a real crisis finally came, their puppy love couldn’t stand the test. The only regret was that they couldn’t even go back to being friends.

“Oh right, I picked up your delivery earlier.” Ah-Xu suddenly remembered. She pulled a pouch from her bag and handed it to him.

The package had a “Same-City Express Delivery” label on it, leaving Zhu Lianzhen completely puzzled.

It was only palm-sized, wrapped in several layers of bubble wrap. He peeled it open layer by layer and found a white earbud case inside.

It was from Tan Qing.

Only then did Zhu Lianzhen think to check the sender’s address. He picked up the outer packaging and, upon seeing it, was completely stunned—

It was the address of the apartment he and Tan Qing had shared before they broke up.

Why had it been sent from there?