ITC Chapter 17

 

“Then why don’t you try it yourself?”

That was the last thing Wen Ruqing said to Bai Xizhou that night.

He had asked Bai Xizhou if he wanted to try fixing it himself, but Bai Xizhou shook his head and said that professional matters should be left to professionals.

That night, Wen Ruqing tossed and turned, unable to sleep. What kept flashing through his mind were Bai Xizhou’s slightly reddened eyes and the trembling of his hands during their hug. He opened his eyes and stared blankly at the ceiling, then sat up and began flipping through the pages of those books.

Although he had been helping with the restoration work, he hadn’t actually read the contents carefully.

Wen Ruqing began reading word by word. Aside from the main text of the book, some parts had notes written in blue ink—some were already blurred, but even after all these years, it was clear the person who wrote them had done so with great care.

This was something Bai Xizhou’s grandfather had left for him. Wen Ruqing could almost imagine the old man, with white hair, still remembering his grandson’s birthday even on his deathbed. He had probably passed away with the regret of not being able to hand over the gift personally.

But how deep must the hatred have been, for Bai Xizhou’s mother to burn it? And how devastated must Bai Xizhou have been at the time?

Later, Wen Ruqing had a dream. In it, he saw a little boy squatting on the ground, quietly crying. He was so young, yet even his crying was muffled, like a wounded little animal licking its wounds alone in a corner. Wen Ruqing walked over, wanting to pat the boy’s head—but his hand passed right through the child. Only then did he realize: this was a dream, and he had no physical form.

The boy cried for a while before slowly stopping. Wen Ruqing watched as the child lifted his head a little and wiped his tears with his sleeve. Then he looked up with wide eyes. Though the item in his arms had dirtied his clothes, he still held it tightly, staring into the void with a calmness that was eerily unsettling.

What shocked Wen Ruqing wasn’t the unnatural calm on the boy’s face, but that the child in the dream resembled Bai Xizhou.

The dream ended abruptly there. Wen Ruqing woke up slumped over the desk, red marks on his face from the creases in his clothes. He had actually fallen asleep there. He checked his phone—it was already 1 PM.

Wen Ruqing sat for a while, trying to regain feeling in his numb arms. Sleeping in such an awkward position all night had left his neck in pain. Frowning, he massaged it in an attempt to ease the soreness and pulled out some medicated patches from the cabinet.

Those patches were easy to find in his place—he had them everywhere.

The weather was nice today. The sky was a soft blue, with clouds thick like cotton candy floating lazily. The sun hung high, and a few little birds flew past the window, stirring a breeze that made the wind chimes ring gently “ding-ling.”

Bai Xizhou had just returned from outside. Seeing that Wen Ruqing was awake, he greeted him.

“Your aunt asked you to go to the city to buy some things.” He pulled out his phone and handed it to Wen Ruqing, showing him the message Wen Qing had just sent. “She said you weren’t answering your phone, so she sent the message to me instead.”

It didn’t seem like a big deal… but at the same time, something about it felt off.

But Wen Ruqing wasn’t in the mood to think too much about it. He stared at the phone screen, but his gaze involuntarily drifted to Bai Xizhou’s hand, and then from his hand to his face.

He really did look a lot like the little boy in his dream. Although he had grown up, the fine details between his brows and eyes hadn’t changed.

“What is it? Is there something on my face?” Bai Xizhou was a little flustered by Wen Ruqing’s open and direct gaze.

Wen Ruqing simply shook his head. He couldn’t exactly say, I dreamt about you as a child last night—that would be way too weird.

“It’s nothing. I’m heading into the city now.” He walked quickly past Bai Xizhou, then suddenly stopped and turned his head. “Do you want to come with me?”

“Sure.”

---

There was only one bus that ran from Yunduan Town to the city. Since it was the afternoon, there weren’t many people heading out, and the bus had plenty of empty seats. The two of them chose seats near the back. At this time of day, the air conditioning hadn’t been turned on yet, and the windows were all open. The wind blew in, messing up their hair, but neither of them bothered to close the windows.

“All the buses we have here are old ones retired from the city. This one’s not too bad, but the ones I used to ride were a real mess—felt like they might fall apart any second,” Wen Ruqing leaned back in his seat and grumbled to Bai Xizhou about the state of the local buses.

Having never seen such buses himself, Bai Xizhou couldn’t quite imagine anything worse than the one they were in now. At least all the buses he’d ridden before looked fairly new—it was hard to picture what a falling-apart bus would even look like.

“You’ve been here for almost a month now. Have you ever explored the city?” Wen Ruqing asked.

“No, I only go to the city for work. I haven’t had time to walk around.”
Besides, he never really planned on going out. Unless work required it, he pretty much stayed in his room.

“Well, since we’re already going, why not take a look around? I haven’t been out exploring in a while either.”

Other than this time, the last time he came home was years ago, and he’d only stayed for a few days—shopping had been the last thing on his mind. With how fast the city had developed, he had no idea what it looked like now.

In a way, this would be his first time really seeing today’s Fujiang.

“I remember hearing that a few big shopping malls were built in the city center, and that the old park was renovated too. They say the once-bustling pedestrian street is kind of deserted now. I’ve only heard about all this—I haven’t actually gone to see it yet.”

From the moment they got on the bus, Wen Ruqing had been talking non-stop. Bai Xizhou responded now and then. The bus’s old machinery groaned loudly as it ran, sometimes so noisy that Bai Xizhou couldn’t hear what Wen Ruqing was saying at all—but Wen Ruqing just kept on talking.

“Why are you suddenly so talkactive?” Bai Xizhou leaned close and asked near Wen Ruqing’s ear, not thinking his action was the least bit inappropriate.

Wen Ruqing quickly leaned away, covering his ear.

Too close.

He thought to himself that he should find a time to tell Bai Xizhou—even between two men, a certain amount of personal space should be respected. But then again, he recalled that he’d done plenty of similar things himself in the past.

Forget it—neither of them had any right to judge the other.

“I actually get a little motion sick. If I don’t talk, I start to feel nauseous.”

When he used to ride the bus, he’d sleep through it, but now with Bai Xizhou beside him, sleeping felt a bit impolite. Talking was the only way to ease the queasiness.

“You can take a nap. I’ll wake you when we arrive.”

It was a strange feeling—Bai Xizhou always seemed to understand the things he didn’t say out loud.

“That doesn’t seem very polite,” Wen Ruqing replied, still a bit hesitant.

“I’ll just listen to music. You sleep.” As he spoke, Bai Xizhou pulled out his phone and opened the music app.

Wen Ruqing didn’t say anything more. He leaned back against the seat and closed his eyes. Maybe it was because of his poor sleeping posture the night before that his sleep had been bad. Normally, even if he dozed off on the bus, he wouldn’t fall completely asleep. But today, there was indeed a period where he lost consciousness completely.

Bai Xizhou sat beside him. A faint medicinal scent, carried by the wind, drifted into his nose. His hand paused on the playlist as he turned to look at Wen Ruqing.

He said he was going to sleep, but his posture didn’t look comfortable at all. Wen Ruqing’s head kept nodding forward, and the hand propping up his head would give out from time to time. Bai Xizhou had the urge to help him several times, but Wen Ruqing never gave him the chance—every time, he quickly straightened back up.

Bai Xizhou almost wanted to laugh. He really wasn’t leaving anyone a chance.

It was as if the bus heard Bai Xizhou’s thoughts—it braked suddenly. Wen Ruqing lunged forward, nearly banging his chin on the seat in front. Thankfully, Bai Xizhou reacted quickly and caught him. At that moment, Wen Ruqing opened his eyes, a little dazed, not quite understanding why Bai Xizhou’s hand was under his chin.

“…Waving goodbye once again
Farewells that feel just like yesterday…”

The lyrics in Bai Xizhou’s earphones played just then. Meeting Wen Ruqing’s eyes was like tossing a pebble into a still lake, ripples spreading layer by layer.

What was he doing? Was he getting too close to Wen Ruqing?

Before Bai Xizhou could sort out his thoughts, Wen Ruqing was already preparing to get off the bus. Bai Xizhou had no choice but to follow behind, his thoughts tangled like a ball of yarn.

Absentmindedly, Bai Xizhou trailed Wen Ruqing into the mall. He pushed the shopping cart behind him as Wen Ruqing followed the list sent by Wen Qing and tossed items into the cart. Once they’d bought nearly everything, Wen Ruqing suddenly realized it had gone quiet behind him. Turning around, he found Bai Xizhou zoning out, clearly deep in thought, brows furrowed as if struggling with a difficult decision.

“What are you thinking? Want to go to the fifth floor? There’s some fun stuff up there.” Wen Ruqing waved his hand in front of his face.

Snapping out of it, Bai Xizhou looked at Wen Ruqing.

What had he just been thinking? He had actually wondered if he was starting to have feelings for Wen Ruqing that went beyond friendship. How was that possible? They hadn’t even known each other for a full month. He was bound to leave Yunduan Town eventually, but Wen Ruqing might stay.

It was just that they spent a lot of time together. It was just that he happened to understand Wen Ruqing’s moods and worries. It was just that he cared a bit more out of respect for Wen Qing. It was just that he was a bit more curious about him. It was just that he stayed here a little longer because of him.

But the foundation of all that was—they were friends. So everything he did was normal, without any deeper feelings involved. There was no other kind of feeling.

With that settled, Bai Xizhou relaxed a lot. After storing their purchases, he followed Wen Ruqing up to the fifth floor.

The fifth floor had an arcade, bustling with people. Game sounds mixed together into a noisy blur. Bai Xizhou wasn’t particularly interested, but Wen Ruqing exchanged some tokens, wandered around, and finally stopped in front of a claw machine.

The plush toys inside weren’t especially cute, but seeing the eager look on Wen Ruqing’s face, Bai Xizhou didn’t say anything. He stood to the side, watching Wen Ruqing control the claw to try and grab a toy—each time dropping it just before it reached the chute. He kept trying, tokens dwindling, and still didn’t catch a single one.

“This is hard.” After another failed attempt, Wen Ruqing sighed, visibly discouraged.

He had enough tokens left for two more tries.

If he couldn’t catch even one, wouldn’t that be kind of embarrassing in front of Bai Xizhou?

“Let me try.” Bai Xizhou took the remaining tokens from Wen Ruqing’s hand and put one in.

Maybe it was just luck—Bai Xizhou succeeded on the first try and caught a brown bunny plush.

Unwilling to admit defeat, Wen Ruqing used his last token for one more try. As expected, he still didn’t win.

“This bunny looks a lot like the two I have at home. You can have it.”

Getting frustrated over losing at a claw machine was a little childish—but being upset was still more human than wearing a blank face.

---

The only bus back to Yunduan Town was the last one at 6 PM. They didn’t stay out too long and went to pick up their things and head back.

Just their luck—the return bus turned out to be the exact one Wen Ruqing had complained about earlier, the one that felt like it could fall apart any moment. Bai Xizhou clicked his tongue, clearly stunned by how broken-down it looked.

They sat in the same seats as before. At this time of day, there were more people on the bus. Taking the bus really was a physically draining task. Wen Ruqing sat quietly, not speaking or sleeping, his gaze a little blank.

“Here.” Bai Xizhou held out his palm, a piece of preserved plum candy in it. “Sour stuff might help with motion sickness.”

They’d been together all day, and Wen Ruqing hadn’t even noticed when Bai Xizhou bought candy.

“Lawyer Bai, are you always like this—with everyone? So attentive?” Wen Ruqing’s voice was soft, and the noise of the bus was too loud. Bai Xizhou didn’t catch what he said.

He saw Wen Ruqing’s lips move, saw him take the candy, unwrap it, and pop it into his mouth. Then he leaned against the window and closed his eyes.

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Author note:

In his earphones, Bai Xizhou was listening to the band Tong Yang’s song: “May Love Be Free of Worry.”