After breaking up with Chi Shuo, Shen Qu shut herself away at home for a long time. Or so it seemed. In reality, she went out every day because she had to go to the hospital to deliver meals to her mother and grandmother.
Besides that, she couldn’t neglect her studies either. All of this made her feel exhausted.
But with the accident that happened at home, she couldn’t just ignore it. Every time she finished bathing her grandmother at the hospital, she couldn’t resist the urge to call Chi Shuo and tell her how much she missed her. But all she could do was clutch her phone, rereading their past chat history.
— Class is over. What’s for lunch?
— The cafeteria made a monstrous strawberry stir-fried green pepper… ptui, I mean stir-fried.
— The teacher for this class is a bit bald. I thought he was over forty, but it turns out he’s only in his thirties.
She hadn’t deleted any of this chat history, even though Chi Shuo had already deleted her. Because she had cheated, and after Chi Shuo found out, she came to break up with her.
Only the two of them knew about the breakup, just like only the two of them had known they were together in the first place.
Thinking of this made Shen Qu’s nose sting. She looked up at her grandmother lying in the hospital bed, unable to hold back her tears as they streamed down.
Shen Qu’s mother quickly handed her tissues. Neither of them spoke, because there was nothing more to say about the family situation. They had endured too much over the past half month. Saying more would only bring more pain, and it wouldn’t help.
After staying home for another week, Shen Qu bid farewell to her mother. “Mom, the company is calling me back. Take good care of yourself and Grandma. I’ll send money soon.”
She desperately needed money. Chenyue Film and Television took her family situation into account. After she reported to the company, they transferred her some money, agreeing to deduct it from her future earnings.
Shen Qu felt both grateful and puzzled. She asked her manager, Gao Jie, “Gao Jie, why is the company so sure I’ll be able to earn money in the future?”
Gao Jie smiled at her. “Because you need the money.”
People who need money naturally put in more effort.
And Shen Qu certainly did. Her university major had nothing to do with acting, but during the systematic study and training at the company, she always had to put in many times more effort than others.
She would stare at her own face in the mirror, trying to capture the perfect expression. She’d study scripts late into the night. Even when her instructors were tired, she felt she hadn’t done enough. Day after day, she received more and more praise.
The boss of Chenyue Film and Television liked giving young people opportunities, regardless of their family background. As long as they performed exceptionally well during training, they got the chance to start acting, taking their first step into the entertainment industry.
Shen Qu’s first role was in a low-budget film. She played the second female lead, not the protagonist, but that was enough for her. At the time, she considered the opportunity extremely precious, because some of the others training alongside her hadn’t even landed a role like that yet.
She cherished it.
She performed well too.
However, a low-budget film like this meant little investment in promotion, and cinemas wouldn’t allocate many showtimes.
The film shot for two months, which was rather short. Shen Qu’s pay wasn’t high, and she sent it all home, telling her family not to worry, that she was doing fine at the company.
She was doing alright. The company provided food and housing, and she spent all her time studying acting, with no other expenses.
After finishing the film, she threw herself back into her studies. Otherwise…
Whenever she had a free moment, she would think of Chi Shuo.
When they broke up, Chi Shuo’s tears fell drop by drop, seeming to leave marks on the ground and stirring waves in Shen Qu’s heart.
Shen Qu remembered she hadn’t raised a hand to wipe away Chi Shuo’s tears, hadn’t offered her a tissue. She had even smiled, singing to Chi Shuo, “Happy breakup, I wish you happiness, you can find someone better.”
She wasn’t a good singer—even that line was off-key. But Chi Shuo loved to sing, and sang beautifully. Shen Qu used to always pester Chi Shuo to hum a few lines for her. She had even secretly signed Chi Shuo up for the campus singing competition in their sophomore year.
Shen Qu once again remembered Chi Shuo shining brightly at the singing competition. She still recalled the thought that dominated her mind back then: That’s my girlfriend.
And now, that thought had evolved into—That’s my ex-girlfriend.
An ex-girlfriend who couldn’t be known to others. For her own career development, Shen Qu had no choice but to bury this past deep in her heart.
The movie was released rather quickly. Initially, it had very few screenings, the official Weibo account had little traction, and the second-day box office was dismal. Although she knew this would happen, she couldn’t help feeling a bit disheartened.
During those two months of filming, Shen Qu hadn’t rested well. The second female lead she played suffered from mental illness and needed to look haggard. To fit the role, Shen Qu became haggard herself, losing over ten pounds, her eye sockets becoming sunken.
But then, a miracle seemed to happen.
The next day, the movie’s box office surged. The reason behind it was excellent word-of-mouth. People who saw it started recommending it enthusiastically. The most influential push came from Qi Siqiao. She watched the film, saw that her junior colleague’s performance was excellent, and since they were from the same company, she posted on Weibo to promote it.
After that, the movie’s trajectory far exceeded their expectations. As the box office climbed, showtimes increased, and more people went to see it. The fundamental reason was simply that the movie was excellent.
By the end of its run, the film had grossed 600 million yuan. Compared to its budget, this was an excellent result.
Shen Qu’s name started becoming known. Many people praised her acting skills in Weibo comments, and her fanbase grew steadily. By then, she was already filming her second role.
Her life seemed to revolve solely around filming. She finished her second role, then her third…
Her life was very full. She wasn’t lonely on set, often rushing between schedules and appearances. None of the dramas she acted in flopped, so she earned more and more money.
Gao Jie told her, “Shen Qu, you’re already on the reserve list for A-list young actresses.”
Yes.
She was already close to reaching the top tier of the domestic entertainment industry.
After finishing another drama—by then, she had been signed with Chenyue Film and Television for two and a half years—she didn’t rush into her next role. Instead, she took over half a month off and returned to Lucheng, just before the Spring Festival.
When she returned, Lucheng was buried in heavy snow, and her flight was delayed by two hours.
It was a private trip; she hadn’t even brought an assistant. Yet, her flight information was still sold. At the airport, she was surrounded by fans who had come to meet her. Curious onlookers touched her hand, and someone even touched her waist. If the fans hadn’t formed a barrier, she might not have made it out of the airport.
When she got home, she still felt exhausted.
Her grandmother was no longer in the hospital. Shen Qu had bought a new house for the family and hired help to care for her paralyzed grandmother, easing her mother’s burden.
Shen Qu’s mother cooked a table full of dishes. Looking at Shen Qu, her eyes filled with heartache. “You’ve lost weight again.”
In the two-plus years since Shen Qu went to Beijing to build her career, she had returned home occasionally, but each visit was rushed, and sometimes she was just passing through.
Shen Qu smiled brightly. “No, Mom. My assistant even told me recently that I need to watch my diet because I’ve gained weight.”
She loved hot pot but couldn’t eat it often because it was too fattening. Not only her assistant but also Gao Jie would remind her that as an actress, she needed to manage her figure.
So, after every hot pot meal, she would face a grueling workout session, worried that she might gain weight or look bloated and wouldn’t compare well to other actresses on camera.
She had to strive because everyone else was working incredibly hard. So many people in the industry fought desperately for money. People said she was lucky because her dramas and films always did well, but behind that success was her immense effort.
One aspect of this effort was her rampant longing for Chi Shuo, yet she constantly forced herself not to pay attention to anything related to Chi Shuo. It was an immense test of willpower, and she didn’t know how much longer she could endure.
Shen Qu often wondered why she liked Chi Shuo, but she could never find a definitive answer. If she had to force a reason, perhaps it was Chi Shuo’s brilliant smile, or her beautiful voice, or her captivating charm…
She didn’t like Chi Shuo for just one thing; she liked every single point about Chi Shuo.
When the Spring Festival arrived, so did 2018. Shen Qu met up with a few friends from Lucheng for dinner. At the table, Shen Qu maintained her student-era demeanor, appearing indifferent to everything, listening as everyone chatted about the department gossip that had circulated after she left.
Eventually, the gossip turned to her.
Zhuang Changchang asked her, “Shen Qu, have you really not contacted Shuoshuo at all?”
Zhuang Changchang was Chi Shuo’s roommate. They were in the same department, and their relationship was pretty good; otherwise, they wouldn’t have met up.
Shen Qu’s expression didn’t flicker. She spoke of “cutting ties” with utter indifference. “Is there really any need? She went back to Yun Cheng for work. We’re so far apart, what’s there to keep in touch about?”
By then, everyone had graduated and become working professionals.
Shen Qu’s path was undoubtedly different from the others. After the dinner ended, she returned home feeling dizzy from the alcohol.
Her bedroom in the new house was large and exquisitely decorated. She stood before the full-length mirror, looking at her tear-streaked face.
Her mother opened the door and came in. Seeing her state, she immediately grew concerned. “Xiao Qu, what’s wrong?”
Shen Qu slid down the wall, her back pressed against the cool surface. She wiped away a tear, forcing a smile. “It’s nothing, Mom. I just get like this when I drink too much.”
