Liang Mu was nine years old when he went up the mountain.
His parents had been killed by ghosts, leaving behind this child who survived on scraps for two years, drifting from place to place. He eventually stumbled and fell at the feet of Shen Zhi’s father.
Seeing his talent, Shen Zhi’s father handed him two steamed buns and asked, “Do you want to come with me?”
Liang Mu looked at him, or rather, at his tattered Daoist robe and the sword on his back. “Are you a Daoist priest?”
Shen Zhi’s father nodded and smiled. “That’s right.”
Liang Mu asked, “Are you powerful?”
Shen Zhi’s father thought for a moment, then smiled again. “Not bad.”
After that, Liang Mu followed Shen Zhi’s father.
He didn’t expect that before he even began his training, he would first meet a monster.
For a long time, the young Liang Mu thought of his junior brother as a monster.
When they first met, Shen Zhi was seven years old. He was as delicate and beautiful as a carved doll, but his hands were cool, not the temperature of a living person. There were also cracks on his face, making him look eerie and frightening.
Liang Mu stared at him blankly. Shen Zhi, holding his father’s arm, peeked out and called out sweetly and softly, “Shige.”
Liang Mu didn’t like monsters, so he didn’t say anything and turned his head away.
Shen Zhi was clingy and ran over to grab his sleeve. Liang Mu tried to pull away, like a little wolf cub, glaring at him fiercely. The child, delicate as a jade doll, was insistent. With Shen Zhi’s father present, Liang Mu didn’t make a scene, and eventually Shen Zhi tugged on his sleeve.
Shen Zhi’s father watched them, smiling kindly. “From now on, you two brothers should get along well.”
Shen Zhi replied happily, “Mhm.” But in his heart, Liang Mu thought, Who wants to befriend a monster like that? I’m here to learn Daoist magic, and once I’ve finished, I’ll leave.
Shen Zhi’s father told Liang Mu that Shen Zhi was born prematurely and had been in poor health since he was a child. He died at the age of five. Unable to bear losing his son, he had kept his soul and created this body for him.
He looked deeply at the young and intelligent boy and said softly, “I won’t live much longer, Liang Mu. You two are senior and junior brothers. You must take good care of your junior brother.”
Everything has its own way. Shen Zhi was already dead. By forcing him to stay alive, Shen Zhi’s father would eventually suffer divine retribution.
Liang Mu looked up at his master for a moment, then lowered his head and said respectfully, “Yes, Master.”
Shen Zhi’s father patted his head with a look of relief.
That night, the two senior and junior brothers slept in the same bed.
It was the height of summer, and outside the window, cicadas chirped without end. The stars were bright, scattered across the sky.
Shen Zhi said, “Shige, why do you dislike me so much?”
Liang Mu gave him a look but didn’t say anything.
Shen Zhi moved closer to him. “Talk to me, Shige, Shige, Shige…”
Liang Mu: “Shut up and go to sleep.”
Shen Zhi pouted and grabbed Liang Mu’s hand, but Liang Mu acted as if he’d been burned and shoved him away with great force. With a bang, Shen Zhi hit the wall and immediately cried out, “Ouch—” He clutched his head. “Oh no, it’s going to crack.”
After pushing him, Liang Mu immediately regretted it. He hadn’t meant to use so much force. Hearing Shen Zhi cry out in pain, he clenched his fingers.
Shen Zhi: “My father just fixed it for me, and now it’s broken again. Waaah, it hurts so much.”
After a long moment, Liang Mu said in a muffled voice, “I, I’m sorry.”
Shen Zhi glanced at him, still complaining, “Oh, it hurts… it really, really hurts.”
Liang Mu’s heart seized up, worried that something was seriously wrong with Shen Zhi. He got out of bed, scooped up Shen Zhi, and started to run outside. “I’ll go find Master to take a look at you.”
Shen Zhi burst out laughing, wrapping both arms around Liang Mu’s neck. “Shige, you’re so worried. So you don’t dislike me that much after all.”
Liang Mu’s steps wavered. Realizing he’d been tricked, he lowered his gaze, face impassive. Shen Zhi watched him with a mischievous grin. “Shige, don’t let go, or I’ll really get hurt.”
Liang Mu said coldly, “If you get smashed, you deserve it.”
With that, he tossed Shen Zhi back onto the bed, who landed with a solid thud on his backside. Shen Zhi didn’t get angry; he simply giggled and crawled over once more, curling up against the boy who was lying flat. “Shige, I was just teasing you. Don’t be mad.”
“Shige, Shige.” He whined, dragging out the words in a pleading tone.
Liang Mu said, one word at a time, “Shen Zhi.”
“Yes?” Shen Zhi replied, not wanting to genuinely anger Liang Mu. He said, “Shige, it’s so hot outside. How about you hold me while we sleep? I’m warm in the winter and cool in the summer, I’m the coolest thing around.”
Liang Mu: “No need. And don’t say another word.”
Shen Zhi: “Oh.”
The next day, Liang Mu opened his eyes to find Shen Zhi buried in his arms, one leg draped restlessly over his body, sleeping soundly.
Liang Mu: “……”
When Liang Mu first started practicing swordsmanship, he suffered a lot of hardship.
Shen Zhi woke in the middle of the night, groggily turned over a few times, and, seeing no one beside him, realized that Liang Mu was once again practicing tirelessly. In his heart, he sighed, thinking his Shige was truly the most diligent person in the world.
Shen Zhi’s father had a habit of teaching disciples by letting them figure things out on their own. Sometimes Liang Mu would get stuck on a difficult point and wouldn’t sleep, hiding away in a secluded spot to practice until he was drenched in sweat.
For some reason, Shen Zhi could always find him.
Liang Mu was practicing his sword form.
Shen Zhi watched from a rock for a while, then called out, “Shige.”
Liang Mu was long used to this and ignored him.
Shen Zhi said again, “Shige, you’re doing it wrong.”
Although Shen Zhi wasn’t in good health, he had grown up with a sword since he was a child. Influenced by his father, his talent for swordsmanship was far superior to the average person’s.
Only then did Liang Mu look up at him. Shen Zhi’s eyes curved; he naturally had a pair of smiling eyes, and even when he wasn’t laughing, he looked like he was. When he smiled, he looked even more charming and lovely.
Shen Zhi climbed up, took the wooden sword from his waist, and said, “Come, I’ll spar with you.”
The wooden sword had been carved for him by his father, who forbade Shen Zhi from handling a real one.
Liang Mu hesitated, considering breaking off a tree branch, but Shen Zhi’s sword tip was already approaching. He snapped to attention, his eyes fixed solely on the child’s earnest expression.
After a round of sparring, they stopped. Liang Mu felt as though he had turned a corner and a new path had been revealed. Unable to hide his emotions yet, a smile unconsciously appeared on his face. He said softly, “Thank you…” He paused, then uttered the two words, “Shidi.”
Shen Zhi looked at the sword marks on the wooden sword, touching them with a pained expression. He laughed. “Shige, do you really want to thank me?”
Liang Mu looked at him and nodded sincerely.
Shen Zhi: “Then Shige, carry me back.”
Liang Mu: “……”
Shen Zhi said in a pampered voice, “Practicing swords so late at night, my legs hurt. Shige, hurry up; a promise is a promise.”
He only practiced for a moment, how can his legs hurt… Liang Mu looked at him for a while, then bent down and said, “Get on.”
Shen Zhi immediately jumped on, wrapped his legs around Liang Mu’s waist, and laughed, “Let’s go, we’re heading back!”
Liang Mu supported his bottom and warned, “Don’t wiggle around.”
Shen Zhi chuckled happily, hugged his neck, and swung his feet back and forth. After a moment, he complained, “Shige, why do you smell all sweaty?”
Liang Mu said flatly, “I’m carrying you, and you’re still such a handful. Walk on your own.”
Shen Zhi clung to him, wrapping his legs tightly around Liang Mu, and whined teasingly, “No way, Shige has to carry me. My legs hurt too much.”
Liang Mu nearly choked and snapped, “Your hands! If you keep messing around, I’m not carrying you anymore.”
Shen Zhi obediently loosened his grip: “Alright.”
When Liang Mu was eleven, Shen Zhi’s father went out to slay a demon, and a snake demon seeking revenge found its way into the mountains.
Liang Mu and Shen Zhi were still children. Even though the demon was a century-old snake spirit, it proved overwhelmingly difficult for them to handle.
They were nearly devoured by it.
Liang Mu guided Shen Zhi in a desperate flight through the mountains. Using their knowledge of the terrain and the protective formations, they managed to stay ahead of the snake demon for the time being.
Shen Zhi’s face was pale. He quietly asked Liang Mu, “Shige, are we going to die?”
Liang Mu remained silent. Seeing Shen Zhi gripping his hand tightly, he briefly considered leaving him behind. Shen Zhi’s soul was unstable, his body was unable to withstand the demonic aura, and an air of death hung about his face.
The demon is seeking revenge on the Shen family anyway, he thought. Without this burden, I could escape alone.
That was what he thought, but Liang Mu stared at Shen Zhi for a moment and said, “No, we won’t.”
The young boy’s voice was calm, as if it held a power of reassurance.
Shen Zhi blinked and said, “Shige, I’m a little scared.”
Liang Mu pinched his cool cheek. “Don’t worry.”
Shen Zhi: “Shige, there’s blood on your hand. You got it on my face.”
Liang Mu: “…You’re so delicate.”
Later, the snake demon found them anyway. Liang Mu, in a moment of heated impulse, told Shen Zhi to run and went to face the demon himself. As he came face-to-face with the demon’s fangs, Liang Mu thought mockingly, I must be sick in the head. Why would I sacrifice my life for Shen Zhi? He has a father with great divine powers; if he dies, it’s just another life. But if I die, I’m truly gone.
Unexpectedly, at the moment of crisis, just as Liang Mu was about to be swallowed whole, a yellow talisman flew out of nowhere, burning the snake demon and causing it to let out a long, pained hiss and writhe in agony.
Liang Mu forced his eyes open. Shen Zhi’s fragile little body trembled as he stood before him.
The snake demon was enraged and lunged at Shen Zhi with its massive mouth open. Liang Mu’s heart trembled. He struggled to find his sword, trying to get up, but his injuries were too severe, and he couldn’t lift it.
The snake demon died under Shen Zhi’s father’s sword.
His father rushed back, covered in dust from his travels. After killing the demon, he came to his senses and saw Liang Mu, covered in blood, holding Shen Zhi and calling to him, “Master… Master, look at Shidi…”
The young boy’s eyes were red, and he was anxious and panicky, helpless like a small beast separated from its pack.
Later, while Shen Zhi was healing, Liang Mu stood guard silently outside. He only let out a sigh of relief and completely passed out once his master smiled at him.
Seeing this, Shen Zhi’s father felt a great weight lift from his heart.
After his wounds healed, Liang Mu silently skinned the snake demon and sold it to a merchant in the black market for some silver. He used the silver to buy many candies for Shen Zhi. Shen Zhi was so happy he ate them all in one go, only to get cavities that made him wail in pain. He sobbed and accused Liang Mu, who silently took the blame.
Shen Zhi’s father passed away in the fifth year after Liang Mu joined the mountain sect. That year, Liang Mu was fourteen and Shen Zhi was twelve, both half-grown boys.
He died at the hands of a demon. When he returned, he was already beyond saving. He only had time to give Shen Zhi one last look before he was gone.
Shen Zhi, who was always so delicate, didn’t cry or make a fuss. He and Liang Mu buried his father, set up a memorial hall, and kept watch. He was so quiet it was as if he were a different person.
Liang Mu had experienced the death of both parents and a life of wandering at a young age. While he felt sadness, he also held a certain indifference toward life and death, people always had to die eventually.
But seeing Shen Zhi in such a state, Liang Mu was unaccustomed to it, and he felt a hint of worry that he was unwilling to admit.
On the seventh night, Shen Zhi didn’t sleep. Remembering that he hadn’t eaten all day, Liang Mu cooked him a bowl of noodles. Shen Zhi stared at him blankly, then lowered his head and took a bite. For no reason at all, tears began to fall, one by one, dropping into the noodles.
He continued to eat the noodles, sobbing, and said indistinctly, “Shige, I don’t have a father anymore.”
Liang Mu should have told him how awful he looked, but for some reason, he reached out and gently stroked his head, whispering, “You still have Shige.”
Shen Zhi buried his face against Liang Mu’s waist and began to cry uncontrollably.
After Shen Zhi’s father passed away, the two of them left the mountain together. Setting aside their father’s reputation, the senior and junior brothers gradually made a name for themselves.
When people in the Daoist community heard their names, they all gave a thumbs-up, saying they were young and promising, of extraordinary talent and stunning brilliance.
Two years later, their fame was soaring.
Shen Zhi had a body carved from ancient jade. The jade was a treasure left behind by an immortal. Shen Zhi’s father had braved numerous hardships and overcome many obstacles to obtain it, ensuring Shen Zhi could be reborn as a person. However, he needed to constantly search for good jade and extract its essence to sustain himself, or he wouldn’t live long.
The two of them traveled to many places together.
As Shen Zhi grew older, he became a handsome and graceful young man. With his sharp mind and charming personality, he was very popular with others.
Shen Zhi laughed at him. “You’re so young, and you already lack romantic charm. Your face is stiffer than wood, you’ll scare girls away before they even get close.”
Liang Mu gave him a flat look, his gaze briefly touching the handkerchief the girl had given Shen Zhi. He said, “If you have feelings for someone else, don’t flirt with everyone you meet.”
Shen Zhi moved closer and said, “Shige, are you jealous?”
Liang Mu said coldly, “Nonsense.”
With that, he turned and walked away.
Shen Zhi chased after him, smiling as he grabbed Liang Mu’s arm. “Shige, don’t worry, I won’t leave you alone.”
Liang Mu said indifferently, “No need.”
Shen Zhi said, “You don’t need me, but I need you! We grew up together as childhood sweethearts, we’re fellow disciples, the closest people in the world. Aren’t we, Shige?”
Liang Mu: “Let go. It’s unseemly.”
Shen Zhi said, “What’s this about being unseemly? Shige, you haven’t answered me yet!”
Liang Mu said, “No.”
Shen Zhi instantly looked deflated, but he perked up again a moment later. “I don’t care. What you said doesn’t count.”
Liang Mu: “…Then why did you even ask me?”
Shen Zhi said with righteous conviction, “I just wanted to ask.”
The two of them had different personalities, and their ways of doing things were completely different.
Shen Zhi was naturally soft-hearted; he even felt some compassion for demons and evil spirits. Liang Mu, however, was different. His parents had been cruelly killed by malevolent spirits, fueling Liang Mu’s deep hatred for such beings and his belief that they must be destroyed whenever encountered.
With their differing opinions, conflicts were inevitable.
Liang Mu would scold Shen Zhi for being “excessively soft-hearted.”
But Shen Zhi would argue, “Among ordinary people, there are good and bad, so why should all demons and evil spirits be the most heinous and vicious kind?”
When the argument got heated, Liang Mu would say, “Have you forgotten how your father died?”
Shen Zhi’s face turned pale. He stared at Liang Mu for a few moments and said, “Of course I remember.”
Liang Mu immediately regretted what he said, but due to his pride, he couldn’t bring himself to apologize or back down. The two of them ignored each other and went their separate ways.
Later, for some reason, they ended up together again and quietly moved past the unpleasantness. After all, they only had each other.
Shen Zhi’s possessiveness over Liang Mu became evident during an encounter with a seductive ghost.
The ghost was a male, a former male prostitute in life, and in death, he retained an exceptionally beautiful and charming appearance.
He took an interest in Liang Mu.
The ghost was a powerful one, and the two boys were caught off guard. They were affected by his spell and bound to the spot, unable to move. Seeing the ghost sit on top of Liang Mu, Shen Zhi was furious and yelled, “Don’t you touch my Shige!”
Liang Mu glanced at Shen Zhi. For some reason, when the ghost leaned in for a kiss, Liang Mu only tilted his head but didn’t dodge it.
Shen Zhi held a grudge about that one kiss.
For over a decade, he had taken it for granted that Liang Mu belonged to him, that no one would ever try to steal him away. But when he saw that Liang Mu seemed a little impressed by the charming ghost, he instantly felt a pang of jealousy.
Shen Zhi suddenly realized that, unlike the jokes they usually made, his Shige might one day have a Daoist partner and wouldn’t stay by his side forever.
Shen Zhi used his hand to wipe Liang Mu’s face where he had been kissed. Liang Mu grabbed his hand, his expression calm, and said, “What are you doing?”
Shen Zhi, accustomed to being pampered, seethed inwardly. He snapped, “I thought Shige was so proper, yet you let that ghost off just because he was good-looking!”
Liang Mu said flatly, “I didn’t.”
Shen Zhi said, “What do you mean, you didn’t? Why didn’t you dodge when he kissed you?! I could tell you were clearly enjoying it!”
Liang Mu stared at him for a long time and said, “Does it have anything to do with you?”
Shen Zhi was speechless.
Liang Mu said, “He only kissed me. Why are you angry?”
Shen Zhi said without thinking, “You’re my Shige!”
Liang Mu scoffed, “Shige… We’re just fellow disciples. You’re not my Daoist partner.”
Shen Zhi froze.
Liang Mu looked at him with a hint of disappointment in his eyes. In the end, he said nothing more, pressed the new jade he had obtained into Shen Zhi’s palm, grabbed his sword, and walked out.
Shen Zhi tossed and turned throughout the night, unable to sleep. He had a vague understanding of something, yet his heart was restless, gripped by a profound, unspoken anxiety.
Before it was even light out, he shot up and ran out of the temple where they were staying. As soon as he stepped outside, he saw Liang Mu standing guard, holding his sword, his eyes closed in a light nap.
Liang Mu was on alert; the moment Shen Zhi came close, he woke up. When he opened his eyes, Shen Zhi was staring intently at him and called out, “Shige.”
“Mm,” Liang Mu responded. “It’s still early. Go back to sleep.”
Shen Zhi suddenly squatted down, face-to-face with Liang Mu, so close their breaths mingled.
Shen Zhi’s heart was beating a little fast. He said, “Shige, weren’t you asking me why I was angry?”
Liang Mu’s eyebrow raised slightly. Before he could speak, his lips softened as Shen Zhi kissed him.
Because of the kiss, Shen Zhi was breathless, his face flushed, but his eyes were bright.
Liang Mu was stunned. He had only just said, “You,” when Shen Zhi cupped his face and pecked at his lips, then kissed the cheek that had been kissed by the ghost. That wasn’t enough; he even took a little bite.
“Because you’re mine,” Shen Zhi said. “I won’t allow anyone else to touch you.”
Liang Mu lowered his eyes and said, “By what right?”
Shen Zhi said, “I like you.”
Liang Mu’s expression shifted. He looked at Shen Zhi, as if trying to find a trace of a joke in his eyes. After a moment, he said in a calm tone, “You like me?”
Shen Zhi nodded.
Liang Mu said, “Then from now on, you’re not allowed to flirt with everyone.”
Shen Zhi was stunned, then cried out in protest, “I didn’t!”
Liang Mu didn’t say a word. Shen Zhi muttered, “I, I’ll try to be careful.”
Liang Mu said, “Since you’ve said you like me, if you act like you did before, Shige won’t be so polite anymore.”
Shen Zhi blinked and asked slowly, “Shige, what are you going to do?”
Liang Mu said, “I’ll tease you.”
Liang Mu said he would tease him, but Shen Zhi thought about it for a long time and still couldn’t figure out how his expressionless senior brother planned to do so.
But Shen Zhi wasn’t scared; he was even a little excited to see how he would dare to tease him.
After all, Liang Mu had always been good to him.
After a while, Shen Zhi said, “Shige, did you like me for a long time?”
Liang Mu looked at him, his face still calm, but his fingers were stroking his sword. He said, “You’re my junior brother.”
Shen Zhi, being sharp-eyed, poked the hand that was stroking the sword and said with a giggle, “You’re shy!”
Liang Mu said stiffly, “I’m not.”
Shen Zhi said, “You’re being disingenuous. You always touch your sword when you get shy. It’s just like when you first came to the mountain as a kid and I gave you food, you desperately wanted to eat, but you pretended to be polite. When I called you out, you had to clench your hand around something…”
Liang Mu clamped a hand over his mouth and said calmly, “Shen Zhi, it’s morning.”
Shen Zhi blinked and gave a soft “oh,” but not giving in, he leaned in and licked the palm of Liang Mu’s hand. Liang Mu immediately pulled his hand back, stared at Shen Zhi’s tongue for a few moments, then forced himself to look away. He abruptly stood up, said, “I’m going to get water,” and ran off.
Shen Zhi looked at his fleeing figure, laughing uncontrollably, and shouted again, “Shige, I’ll wait for you to come back!”
Liang Mu did like Shen Zhi.
He didn’t know when it started, but maybe after looking at one person for a long time, his eyes couldn’t see anyone else anymore.
But Shen Zhi had a way of pushing his buttons, making him so furious that he wanted to leave Shen Zhi behind and stop caring altogether.
Yet, as soon as Shen Zhi called out to him, Liang Mu was helpless. He told himself it was for his master’s sake. Besides, Shen Zhi was too delicate and fragile. On his own, he might one day become shattered jade, his soul a tool for demons and evil spirits to cultivate, with no place to rest.
When Shen Zhi was asleep, Liang Mu would stare at his face, unable to stop himself from reaching out and touching his cheek. He’d whisper, “Shen Zhi, when will you—”
When would he do what? Grow up a little, be a little more obedient, and think about him more?
Liang Mu was always reserved. The words turned a few times on his tongue before he swallowed them. There was nothing wrong with Shen Zhi just the way he was.
A moment later, he thought, Shen Zhi is very good-looking, no wonder others are drawn to him. Perhaps it’s because he’s made of jade; his entire being radiates an extraordinary spiritual beauty and grace.
But Liang Mu had seen what he looked like when he was damaged. A malicious streak no one knew about hid in his heart. He thought, What if I shattered Shen Zhi, left him full of cracks, and turned him back into a little monster?
Everyone would shun him, and no one would dare to get close.
Even after being raised by his master for five years, Liang Mu’s bones still carried the nature of a stray dog, or a wild wolf, hardened by the streets, with a hidden brutality and ferocity beneath his calm, composed exterior.
But Liang Mu couldn’t bring himself to do it, Shen Zhi would be in pain.
Liang Mu gently traced his eyebrows. He was his. Liang Mu had watched him grow up since he was a child, poured everything he had into him, and spared no effort to cultivate his good looks. He would not allow anyone else to covet him.
Shen Zhi’s eyelashes fluttered as he was about to wake up. Liang Mu calmly pulled back his hand. He only heard Shen Zhi call out, “Shige.”
Liang Mu looked at him, stroked his head, and said, “Shige is here. Go back to sleep.”
T/N: I love how most Gong always seem to have those dark thoughts about their Shou😌
Bello 😘🌹🦋