Yu Lingshan’s words seemed to flip a switch in Xu Shi, and she started crying even harder.
“You… came… back,” Xu Shi said between sobs.
Yu Lingshan was immediately amused by Xu Shi. She shifted, sitting down in front of her, and reached out to brush away the bangs that were covering Xu Shi’s eyes. “What’s wrong?” she asked softly. “Why are you crying so much?”
Xu Shi was so aggrieved that her chin tensed up.
She spoke with great effort: “I… I missed… you.”
Yu Lingshan was completely helpless. “You’re really something.”
Xu Shi still remembered what Yu Lingshan had said—that saying she missed her meant she could get a kiss. So after uttering these magic words, she grabbed Yu Lingshan’s clothes and pulled her closer.
She leaned her head in as well.
Unfortunately, she was pushed away by Yu Lingshan.
Xu Shi had mustered all her courage for this, and Yu Lingshan’s push made her feel like a deflated ball. She broke down in an instant, and the tears she had just managed to stop started flowing again.
“Don’t cry,” Yu Lingshan told her.
Xu Shi immediately sucked in a breath, holding it.
Yu Lingshan asked her first, “Why did you drink?”
Xu Shi slowly exhaled, her voice thick with tears. “I was sad.”
Yu Lingshan: “Why were you sad?”
Xu Shi just repeated, “Sad.”
Yu Lingshan asked, “Because of me?”
Xu Shi nodded. “Mhm.”
Yu Lingshan: “Will you still remember what I’m saying now when you’re sober?”
Xu Shi didn’t answer the question, but her hand clutched tightly onto Yu Lingshan’s jacket.
Yu Lingshan understood at a glance.
She tried another question: “Why were you sad because of me?”
Hearing this, Xu Shi thought very hard for a while before asking, “Do you like me, Yu Lingshan?”
Yu Lingshan laughed instantly.
In her current state, Xu Shi couldn’t perceive Yu Lingshan’s emotions. She could only blindly listen to her words. Seeing Yu Lingshan smile, she actually smiled a little too.
This made Yu Lingshan laugh again.
Then she asked, “Do you want me to like you, or not like you?”
This time, Xu Shi answered quickly. “I want you to like me.”
There was a longing in Xu Shi’s eyes, like a child desperate for candy, staring eagerly at Yu Lingshan.
“You’d better like me a lot, a whole lot,” Xu Shi seemed to want to make this point very clear. She stopped crying as she spoke, her voice trying its best to be distinct. “I hope you’re only like this with me, that you’re serious about me, that I’m the only one for you, Xu Xiao Zhi.”
When Xu Shi said “Xu Xiao Zhi,” she seriously held up one finger.
But she used the same hand that was clutching Yu Lingshan’s clothes. After making the gesture, she quickly grabbed back on, as if afraid Yu Lingshan would run away.
“Okay?” Xu Shi asked.
Yu Lingshan took it all in. She pressed her lips together. The sob in Xu Shi’s voice actually made her nose sting a little.
Xu Shi was still looking at Yu Lingshan with her big, expectant eyes, waiting for an answer.
Yu Lingshan asked, “Do you like me?”
For some reason, this question made Xu Shi start crying again.
A huge teardrop instantly fell from her eye.
“I do,” she said. “I like you a lot.”
Yu Lingshan: “But you’re drunk right now. How can I believe you? When you wake up, you’ll forget.”
Xu Shi nodded forcefully. “I do like you.”
Yu Lingshan wiped away Xu Shi’s tear with her thumb. “How much do you like me?”
Xu Shi thought for a moment, then suddenly stopped crying. “That, I don’t know.”
Yu Lingshan sighed and grabbed the tissue box from the coffee table. “Wipe your tears first.”
Xu Shi didn’t move.
Yu Lingshan tapped the hand that was gripping her clothes. “I’m not leaving.”
Only then did Xu Shi let go of Yu Lingshan. She pulled out a tissue, dabbed her face with it a couple of times, and tossed it into the trash can.
Yu Lingshan: “Your nose.”
Xu Shi pulled out two more tissues and blew her nose.
Then she grabbed onto Yu Lingshan’s clothes again. “Okay, done.”
Helpless, Yu Lingshan took a tissue and gently pressed it to Xu Shi’s eye. “Did you drink before coming over?”
Xu Shi: “Mhm.”
Yu Lingshan: “And you dare to say ‘mhm’ so loudly.”
Xu Shi must have taken this as a compliment, because she actually managed a smile.
Yu Lingshan continued dabbing the tears from her other eye. “Do I make you feel insecure?”
Xu Shi’s brow immediately furrowed. It was as if Yu Lingshan had hit her most sensitive spot, and her whole body tensed with discomfort.
Yu Lingshan: “Don’t cry.”
Xu Shi’s upper body twitched, and she let out an aggrieved “mhm.”
Some of the long bangs on Xu Shi’s forehead were damp with tears. Yu Lingshan carefully brushed them aside and asked, “Why do you feel that way?”
Xu Shi’s hand trembled with nervousness, and she didn’t dare to hold onto Yu Lingshan anymore. She seemed to sense that Yu Lingshan was angry, so she slowly pulled her hand back and lowered her head. “You kissed me without saying anything. Why did you kiss me? And after you kissed me, you didn’t say anything. You said all those things to me, did all those things with me.”
The floodgates opened for Xu Shi. “Are you just flirting with me?”
“Flirting is fine, too,” Xu Shi nodded. “It’s fine. I’ve gotten serious, but what if that’s not what you mean?”
“And Heard, why are you Heard? What were you doing as Heard?”
“Why would you like me?”
“Why? Why?”
After saying all this, Xu Shi started crying again. After a moment, she remembered Yu Lingshan telling her not to cry, so she curled into a ball, hugging her legs and burying her face in her knees to cry, not letting Yu Lingshan see.
Through all of this, Yu Lingshan just listened, just sat there, not saying a word.
This made Xu Shi feel even more wronged, and she buried her head deeper.
After an unknown amount of time, she calmed down on her own. She uncurled her legs, even remembered to grab two tissues to wipe her tears and blow her nose, and then looked at Yu Lingshan with what she considered a refreshed expression. “Okay, I’m done crying.”
Yu Lingshan was amused again.
Xu Shi’s expression seemed to be begging for praise.
So Yu Lingshan gave her a thumbs-up. “Great job, little one.”
For some reason, this sentence struck a nerve with Xu Shi. Her brow furrowed at once. “You have lots of ‘little ones’.”
Just as tears were about to well up again, Yu Lingshan cut her off. “If you cry again, I’ll get angry.”
Xu Shi blinked and swallowed, holding back the tears.
“I’m not going to talk about these things with you right now,” Yu Lingshan said.
Hearing this, Xu Shi instantly felt wronged again, and her eyes filled with tears.
Yu Lingshan caressed her face. “Promise me you won’t cry.”
Xu Shi clenched her jaw, forcing herself not to cry.
Yu Lingshan asked again, “Are you ready?”
Xu Shi sniffled. “For what?”
Yu Lingshan’s voice was gentle. “I’m going to kiss you now.”
Xu Shi instantly broke into a smile and nodded earnestly. “Okay.”
But Yu Lingshan didn’t lean in right away. Instead, she said, “A proper kiss.”
Xu Shi: “Mhm.”
Yu Lingshan: “No more being sad.”
Xu Shi: “Mhm.”
Yu Lingshan: “And no more crying.”
“I know,” Xu Shi said with a hint of impatience. “Can you hurry up?”
Yu Lingshan laughed. She leaned in. Xu Shi sat there, waiting to be kissed, but just as their lips were about to touch, Yu Lingshan stopped.
Her breath was right there, in front of her. Xu Shi’s entire nervous system was on edge because of Yu Lingshan.
Finally, Yu Lingshan moved, and Xu Shi finally relaxed.
But Yu Lingshan was like someone teasing a cat, always giving her a little treat just when Xu Shi couldn’t wait any longer.
Sometimes she would tap Xu Shi’s nose with her own, sometimes she would touch her ear, or press her leg against hers. But no matter what, she wouldn’t touch her lips.
Xu Shi was in agony.
But it didn’t take long for her to realize that she could also take the initiative.
Just as Yu Lingshan was tracing the corner of Xu Shi’s eye with her fingertip, Xu Shi’s eyes suddenly shot up. She grabbed Yu Lingshan’s wrist, using her hands and legs to pin Yu Lingshan to the rug.
“Mm…”
Yu Lingshan hadn’t expected this and let out a soft hum.
One hand wasn’t enough. Xu Shi grabbed Yu Lingshan’s other hand as well, pinning them on either side of her head.
Yu Lingshan breathed slowly, gathering her strength to try and sit up, but whenever she exerted force, Xu Shi would match it.
She was completely under Xu Shi’s control.
Xu Shi even wore a triumphant smile.
She felt great!
“So?” Yu Lingshan asked.
There was a small, mischievous glint in Xu Shi’s eyes. “I’m going to kiss you now.”
With that, Xu Shi lowered her head, but Yu Lingshan turned hers away.
Xu Shi lifted her head again, her grip loosening. “No?”
Yu Lingshan: “Call me something nice.”
At times like this, Xu Shi’s mind worked fast. “Wife.”
Yu Lingshan’s eyes curved. “Good girl.”
She propped herself up slightly and first pressed her lips to Xu Shi’s.
Xu Shi released Yu Lingshan’s wrists, cupped the back of her head, and deepened the kiss, gently lowering Yu Lingshan back onto the rug.
At first, they both kissed lightly, almost playfully.
But gradually, Xu Shi’s kisses grew deeper. She was thrilled by the sound of Yu Lingshan’s heavy breaths, thrilled by the involuntary hums that escaped her lips.
Any small movement from Yu Lingshan excited her.
Yu Lingshan was so wonderful to kiss, so fragrant and so kissable. Xu Shi couldn’t control herself at all.
Then, she moved lower, biting the collar of Yu Lingshan’s inner shirt, pulling it to either side as if she were about to rip it off.
The air was filled with low, heavy breathing and the sound of rustling clothes. After a moment, Xu Shi lowered her head, looked at the thing that resembled a clasp, and bit it open.
In that instant, Yu Lingshan let out a soft gasp and pressed down on Xu Shi’s head, stopping her from moving.
Xu Shi realized what she had just unfastened. Her heart began to pound violently. At the same time, with her ear pressed against Yu Lingshan’s chest, she could hear the thumping of Yu Lingshan’s heart as well.
Two similar frequencies, in different spaces, thumping away. Dong dong dong dong.
After they both seemed to calm down for a moment, Xu Shi twirled a stray lock of Yu Lingshan’s hair around her finger and asked, “Is it not okay?”
Yu Lingshan’s hair was a mess, her clothes disheveled. Hearing Xu Shi’s question, she thought for a very, very long time before asking, “What do you want to do?”
Xu Shi said, “I want to do it.”
Xu Shi probably hadn’t expected herself to say that. The moment the words were out, she buried her face in Yu Lingshan’s chest and let out an embarrassed laugh.
It made Yu Lingshan laugh too.
But Yu Lingshan said, “No.”
She patted Xu Shi’s head. “Help me up.”
Xu Shi let out a disappointed “oh.” She pushed herself up from the rug first, then pulled Yu Lingshan up.
Yu Lingshan: “How did you… never mind.” She pointed at herself. “Fasten it.”
Xu Shi obediently reached out her hands, but she pulled them back before even touching the clasp, overcome with shyness.
Yu Lingshan laughed. “What? You know how to bite it open but not how to fasten it shut?”
Xu Shi looked troubled.
Yu Lingshan: “Figure it out yourself.”
Xu Shi said “oh,” and this time she reached out, carefully found the clasp, and fastened it.
Then she pulled Yu Lingshan’s shirt down.
And helped her put her jacket back on properly.
Yu Lingshan looked at Xu Shi helplessly. “Are you awake or drunk right now?”
Xu Shi didn’t answer, just nodded and smiled.
Yu Lingshan: “…”
Drunk.
Damn it, good thing I held back.
Annoyed, Yu Lingshan pinched Xu Shi’s cheek forcefully. “How did this mouth of yours get so skilled?”
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