Chapter 10: Girls Can Be Lewd Too
Don’t think that when girls gather together, our topics of conversation are all pure and innocent. When we girls chat, sometimes we can be even more lewd than guys!
“Um… Hei Mei, I advise you to lower your standards a bit…” I lightly patted her back with a knowing look.
Mao Mao peeked out from behind the pillow with a shy face, “There probably aren’t many virgins left in the Immortal Realm, right?” Although she said it shyly, the gleam in her eyes suggested a different meaning.
Hei Mei rested her face on her hand, drooping her eyelids, “Tch, I don’t care. My ex-boyfriend before him has slept with countless women. The one who wants to marry me must definitely be a virgin.”
“It’s so difficult…” Mao Mao and I sighed together.
Hei Mei gave me a blank look, “Are you telling me that the guys in your high school aren’t virgins anymore?”
My heart sank as soon as Hei Mei mentioned it!
“Don’t even bring it up…” I felt tears welling up in my heart, but I was mostly angry at myself for being blind. “Once we graduated high school, they were no longer virgins. What happened to purity? How could this be? Not even a bit of purity is left~~ Just how long has it been since we started college? They’ve already… done it! Screw that! The country has regulations that forbid explicit descriptions, and yet they dare to defy them!” Damn it, I threw the pillow!
“Xiao Lan! Calm down…” Mao Mao hugged me, and I took a deep breath. “Okay, I’m calm now.”
Hei Mei continued playing her game nonchalantly, “Who cares? If there aren’t any virgins in the Immortal Realm, just find one in the Mortal Realm. Looks don’t matter. If they’re ugly, I’ll pay for them to get plastic surgery in Korea~~~”
What a rich person! Truly a rich person!
Look at that rich person, not hesitating to pay a thousand for a photo of me, and even sending their ugly partner to Korea for plastic surgery, until they’re satisfied!
Yeah~~~ There’s not much difference when guys get plastic surgery. They can’t possibly stuff silicone in their chests and buttocks, so it doesn’t matter for their faces, you can’t even feel it.
Without realizing it, I involuntarily squeezed my hands, as if I had silicone in them. Why do guys like squeezing silicone so much? Why not just buy two pieces?
“Or… what about the guys in our useless house?” Mao Mao mischievously suggested, and Hei Mei smirked while playing her game, “True, if you haven’t seen any girlfriends among the guys in our useless house, they must be virgins…”
“Hush!” I immediately silenced them. They looked at me, and I stood up, looked up and down outside the window, then shouted, “Mo Ming!”
“Ah! My brother!” Mao Mao belatedly shouted.
There was no response from Mo Ming, so I furrowed my brows, “Mo Ming, come out, or you’ll sleep at the doorstep tonight!”
“Swoosh!” In an instant, silver hair flew across my face. He appeared suspended in the air in front of me, his arms crossed over his chest, but he couldn’t bring himself to meet my gaze. The tension in his profile revealed his embarrassment.
“You heard everything just now, didn’t you?”
“Uh…” He hesitated to look at me and responded.
I blushed slightly, “Then keep your distance.”
“That’s absolutely impossible.” He turned his face back to me, blushing, “Fu Su is still in the Immortal Realm.”
I furrowed my eyebrows, “Then come in.”
“Okay.”
I moved aside, and he jumped in through the window, kneeling on one leg, half crouching on my desk. Mao Mao blushed and looked at him, “Brother! You heard everything we just said!”
“Cough!” Mo Ming was about to get up, but he slipped and fell forward from the table. He quickly performed a somersault in the air and stumbled a bit upon landing, but managed to maintain his cool landing pose. If it were me, I would have fallen flat on my face.
Mo Ming sat upright on his knees with a serious expression on his face.
“It doesn’t matter~~~” Hei Mei casually said while playing her game, “Now we have mixed-gender living, so it’s no big deal~~~~”
“But I just started experiencing this kind of communal living. Before this, I always slept at home, and even if I went out, I would be back home by nine in the evening.” I grabbed a pair of noise-canceling earphones from the drawer and placed them in front of Mo Ming.
Mo Ming raised his face and stared blankly at the earphones. I knelt in front of him, making him instantly nervous. His emerald-green eyes were fixed on me, afraid to move. I looked at him and commanded, “Cover your ears.”
He stared at me dumbfounded, as if I was in a trance.
I simply reached out and folded down his upright ears. They were soft and warm, making it hard to let go. Because we were so close, he became even more rigid. I folded his ears and put the noise-canceling earphones over them, then returned to his front and shouted, “Can you hear me now————”
He looked at me blankly for a moment before saying, “Huh?”
I laughed and sat back next to him, looking at Hei Mei and Mao Mao, “Now we can talk freely.”
“He really listens to you.” Hei Mei smirked at Mo Ming, “Even my zombies aren’t as obedient. Sometimes they even throw tantrums with me.”
“It’s because of Xiao Lan.” Mao Mao smiled at me, “In our house, my brother is an absolute authority. No one dares to defy him.”
“Oh, right!” Hei Mei stood up, and Mo Ming looked at us curiously. Hei Mei looked at Mao Mao, “In the Wolf Clan, you won’t engage in any intimate acts without a mate, so your brother is a virgin!”
“Huh?!” Isn’t this topic a bit strange? The person in question is right here!
“Ah! Don’t you dare have any ideas about my brother! He belongs to Xiao Lan!”
Huh?! I definitely don’t want this short-circuiting wolf!!
“Ugh, I’m not interested in interspecies relationships~~~”
Oh my goodness! Isn’t this a bit too explicit?! But Hei Mei is right, Mo Ming is from the Wolf God Clan. They can transform into humans, werewolves, and wolves, and when they’re in their wolf form…
Oh no! My mind is getting more and more perverted.
No, no, I can’t stop my thoughts. Does he switch between the three forms? Ah!!!! Xia Xiaolan, you should just die! Fantasizing about your own guardian, your best friend’s brother!
“Xia Xiaolan, answer the phone.” Suddenly, the voice of the aloof Emperor came through! This phone call came at the perfect time, finally pulling me out of my lewd imagination.
“This voice!” Hei Mei looked at me in astonishment, and Mao Mao immediately raised her index finger, “Shh!”
Mo Ming looked at us with his headphones on, seemingly confused.
“Xia Xiaolan! Get out here!”
What the heck! Is this phone ringtone even artificial intelligence?!
I immediately jumped up and looked around, then headed straight to the bathroom and closed the door to answer. The aloof Emperor’s figure appeared coldly in front of me, along with… um… the toilet lid…
“Pfft!” I couldn’t help but laugh, quickly lowering my face, “Greetings, godfather!”
“Why are you in the bathroom?” The aloof Emperor was displeased. I raised my face and he looked towards the door behind me, “Is there someone here?”
“Yes,” I nodded.
He furrowed his brows, no longer concerned about the bathroom situation, and looked at me coldly, “You are not allowed to mention anything about the cracks in the demon realm or that mysterious guy in black. This is highly confidential information in the immortal realm!”
I felt a twinge of guilt, “Oh…”
The aloof Emperor squinted his eyes, a glimmer of coldness reflecting off his glasses. His gaze seemed to penetrate through my every thought, “Who have you told?” His deep voice reached me, and I immediately shrunk my neck, not daring to deceive him as I mumbled, “Hei Mei… she took the photos… but she said she wouldn’t spread them!” I quickly added, fearing that the aloof Emperor would silence her!
I nervously looked at the aloof Emperor, and he adjusted his glasses, “Only Hei Mei?”
“Yes, yes, yes,” I nodded repeatedly.
He furrowed his brows, “Understood. You are not allowed to tell anyone else from now on.”
“I promise, I promise!”
He gave me a cold glance, “Because of the crack incident, we will have a break starting tomorrow.”
“Oh, really? I’m so excited! I thought our vacation plans were ruined, but the mysterious boss in black actually brought me a vacation! Suddenly, I felt a chill in front of me, so I sneakily glanced and saw Xuan Yuan Chen’s glasses glistening with cold light. I awkwardly composed myself and lowered my face.
They take the cracks in the demon realm very seriously! And here I am, celebrating my vacation. Xia Xiaolan, you’re really pathetic. The only reason you can have a vacation is because they’re off to save the world!
“I’m sorry…” I hesitated to look at him, “Is it because of the boss in black?”
“The boss in black?”
“Yeah, that guy in black,” I raised my face and smiled, “I gave him a cool nickname, don’t you think?”
Xuan Yuan Chen’s face darkened, his icy gaze fixed on me as if saying, “I’m so annoyed, and you’re still coming up with nicknames for the villain?!”
The atmosphere instantly became extremely awkward, and the pressure in the entire restroom became silent as he suddenly stopped speaking.
I lowered my face again, “I’m sorry…”
“You don’t need to take on five or more missions during this vacation period. You’re exempted.”
“Huh?” I looked at him in surprise, trying to contain my excitement. I couldn’t let it show.
He looked at me coldly, “You’ll be cleaning the Royal Palace. I expect every glass surface in the palace to be sparkling when I return!” His glasses gleamed with a cold light. Oh my goodness! He’s obsessed with cleanliness!
He elegantly adjusted his glasses, and I immediately said, “Godfather! I can’t go to the Royal Palace when you’re not there!”
He narrowed his eyes, “Don’t worry, no one will be in the Royal Palace. Just use your face to unlock the door.”
Unlocking the door with my face! How advanced!
He let go of his glasses and his eyes flashed with coldness, “Remember to wash your hands before cleaning the mirrors.”
“Yes, godfather!” I immediately performed a big gesture, “Farewell, godfather!”
“Hmph.” The aloof Emperor let out a cold snort and disappeared before me. I held onto my phone tightly and couldn’t help but jump up, “Yay! Vacation time!”
I pushed the door open, “Vacation time~~~”
Hei Mei and Mao Mao were taken aback, while Mo Ming obediently wore his headphones and looked at us inexplicably.
Excitedly, I said, “Xuan Yuan Chen said the vacation starts tomorrow!”
Hei Mei and Mao Mao were stunned for a moment, then immediately jumped up, grabbed their pillows, and cheered.
Mo Ming still wore his headphones, looking at us with a puzzled expression.
Suddenly, I felt so fortunate to be a mortal. We can be happy for a small vacation, while Xuan Yuan Chen and the others have to worry about saving the six realms. What a difference…
