The wick of the candle by the window had almost burned to the end. With a pop, the flame flared high and then flickered out, turning into a wisp of black smoke that dissipated in an instant.
As Ji Zhen’s words fell, the room was so quiet that only his low, deliberately suppressed sobs could be heard. The two servants outside the door, knowing better, retreated. Their footsteps on the dry leaves on the bluestone path made a crisp sound that echoed like thunder in the night.
Ji Zhen was still kneeling on the warm floor, looking up at Shen Yanqing.
On the way here, he had thought deeply and finally understood the key. Shen Yanqing was the Third Prince’s strategist. If the Crown Prince was defeated, the Third Prince would definitely be the heir. Therefore, he could only beg Shen Yanqing to save his elder brother. As long as Shen Yanqing agreed, he was willing to pay any price.
Ji Zhen knelt forward a step and shakily grabbed Shen Yanqing’s brocade robe. Afraid of angering him, he didn’t dare to use force, only holding it loosely. He called out again, “Lord Shen…”
Shen Yanqing’s brows were furrowed as if covered in frost and snow. “What did you call me?”
A chill ran down Ji Zhen’s spine. He thought for a moment and changed to a more respectful and distant title. “Scho-Scholar Shen?”
To his surprise, Shen Yanqing raised his hand and slapped away the hand he had on his robe. A fierce, searing pain suddenly ignited on the back of his hand, a fire that seemed to burn straight into his heart.
He timidly clutched his hand, pursing his lips and not daring to speak.
Shen Yanqing watched him silently for a few moments, then walked to the window, picked up a tinderbox, and on the second try, relit the candle wick.
Ji Zhen was scared in his heart, but thinking of his elder brother suffering in prison, he gathered his courage again and said, “I know what you want…”
Shen Yanqing turned around and looked at him deeply, gesturing for him to continue.
Ji Zhen slowly clenched his fists, his lips trembling as he forced out the words he had been rehearsing countless times before he could barely say them. “As long as you agree to save my elder brother, I am willing to get a divorce with you.”
As soon as he said this, the tears that had been swirling in his eyes could no longer be held back anymore, and they gushed out.
Ji Zhen had never thought that one day he would be the one to propose a divorce. He had endured countless nightmares, all of them visions of Shen Yanqing’s cold back as he was left behind, yet now he was the one desperately begging the other party to abandon him.
The flickering candlelight danced across Shen Yanqing’s features. He appeared calm and indifferent as he listened to Ji Zhen offer a “reward” for saving Ji Jue. After a moment, his furrowed brows gradually smoothed out, as if he found the matter very interesting and was considering its feasibility.
Seeing the calm and composed look on Shen Yanqing’s face, Ji Zhen felt both a pang of hope that his elder brother could be saved and a deep pain that Shen Yanqing had truly been waiting for this day for a very long time.
His heart ached. He choked out, “The prison is cold and not a place for him to stay for long. I will have someone write the letter of divorce tomorrow. I’ll have to trouble Lord Shen to rescue my elder brother as soon as possible…”
Shen Yanqing coldly interrupted him. “He is not your biological brother.”
Ji Zhen’s teeth chattered, and he said seriously, “Even if we are not related by blood, he is still the only family I have in this world.”
The only one? What a fitting word—“only.”
Shen Yanqing stood with his hands clasped behind his back. “And what if I choose not to save him?”
He slowly walked over and looked down at the tearful Ji Zhen, his voice cold. “Why should I agree to you?”
Each word, like a shard of ice, was hammered into Ji Zhen’s flesh.
“Four years ago, you used the Ji family’s power to force me into marriage. When I refused, your elder brother sent one memorial after another to His Majesty, putting me in danger multiple times. Did you ever consider my difficulties then?”
Shen Yanqing gave a slight, sarcastic laugh. “Now that Ji Jue is in trouble, you are suddenly sympathetic to his suffering. Ji Zhen, ask yourself, do you not feel even a little bit of shame kneeling before me today, begging me to save Ji Jue?”
Ji Zhen appeared as if struck by an unseen force, his lips slightly parted in stunned disbelief.
Shen Yanqing reached out and grabbed his jaw, forcing him to lift his pale face. He carefully traced his features with his gaze and said in a low, slow voice, “You were the one who haunted me and clung to me first. You were the one who insisted on marriage. What right do you have to propose a divorce?”
Ji Zhen trembled. After a long time, he said hoarsely, with a hint of resentment, “But you lied to me too…”
Shen Yanqing’s fingers tightened.
“You had me go to Hanshan Temple with your mother, not to pray for my father at all. You wanted to send me away, didn’t you?” Ji Zhen sobbed uncontrollably. “You and I are husband and wife, but you never told me that you followed the Third Prince…”
As Ji Zhen thought back, a chill ran through him. He stammered out a few words. “You also wanted… to kill me…”
Shen Yanqing’s eyes suddenly went cold. Before he could speak, Ji Zhen said in horror, “Twice.”
He recalled with difficulty. “Once, before we were married, and that arrow in the Southern Garden… you wanted to kill me, didn’t you?”
No wonder Shen Yanqing told his elder brother it was just an accident. But what if it wasn’t?
In that instant, Ji Zhen’s fear of Shen Yanqing overwhelmed his affection. He trembled like a sieve. Instinctively, he even slightly hunched his shoulders, trying to escape Shen Yanqing’s touch as a way to avoid danger.
The tears that gushed from his eyes felt like boiling water scalding Shen Yanqing’s fingertips.
Shen Yanqing’s lips were tightly pressed together. He stared at Ji Zhen gloomily and asked through gritted teeth, “You think that arrow in the Southern Garden was also my doing?”
Ji Zhen pursed his lips and remained silent.
The only time Shen Yanqing had acted on his true feelings and risked his life to protect someone, he was met with Ji Zhen’s suspicion instead.
A scorching fire surged through Shen Yanqing’s chest and lungs. He laughed out of extreme anger and praised, “You’ve been confused your entire life, but you do have your moments of cleverness, Ji Zhen.”
Tears streamed down Ji Zhen’s face as he closed his eyes in pain.
After a moment, Shen Yanqing finally released his grip but showed no desire to speak further with Ji Zhen, and turned to walk away.
Ji Zhen, having not yet received his approval, couldn’t let him leave. He scrambled after him but could only grasp the corner of Shen Yanqing’s robe.
“Lord Shen…” Ji Zhen called out hoarsely. Watching the other party walk to the door, he called out again, “Shen Yanqing!”
The faint glow of the courtyard lanterns fell on the tall, retreating figure. Without turning his head, Shen Yanqing said, “The Ji family and you are both getting what you deserve today. There’s no need for you to say more.”
Ji Zhen’s legs were numb from kneeling. He struggled to stand, only to hear Shen Yanqing’s low voice. “From this moment on, without my permission, the Young Madam is not allowed to step out of the courtyard. Anyone who disobeys will be punished with fifty strokes of the cane.”
All the servants in the courtyard lowered their heads. “Yes.”
Ji Zhen stumbled to the doorway, feeling both aggrieved and angry. He cried out to the figure that was walking further and further away, “Shen Yanqing, why are you locking me up? Stop right there…”
But the Shen Yanqing of the past never stopped for him, and the Shen Yanqing of today was even less likely to pay him any mind.
Ji Zhen fell to the ground. He had suffered too much today and was already on the verge of a breakdown. He finally buried his face in his hands and cried.
Outside the courtyard, Yu He held a lantern to light the way for his master. Hearing the crying, he repeatedly looked back, worried. “My Lord, Lord Ji is the Young Madam’s elder brother. Is it truly…”
Shen Yanqing acted as if he didn’t hear the crying. His heart was as hard as stone, and he gave Yu He, who was pleading, a cold look.
Yu He said sheepishly, “This subordinate misspoke.”
The master and servant walked on under the moonlight. Neither of them noticed the slight trembling of the fingers hidden within the white robe the whole way.
—
The study was piled high with sheets of rice paper with the character for “stillness” written on them.
Shen Yanqing had stayed up all night, practicing calligraphy until his wrist ached, yet he refused to stop.
A servant came to report, “My Lord, the Young Madam says he wants to see you.”
He moved the sheets of rice paper to the side and dipped his brush in ink again. “I will not see him.”
The servant’s face was full of difficulty. “The Young Madam is making a scene… He even overturned his breakfast.”
A drop of ink fell on a pristine sheet of rice paper. Shen Yanqing didn’t even look up. “Let him be.”
After the servant withdrew, he said, “Send someone to Ziyun Lou to buy some milk curd and have it delivered to the main courtyard.”
As he spoke, a strong and powerful character for “Zhen” appeared on the rice paper. Shen Yanqing frowned, put down the small zitan brush, and slowly sat down.
When he opened his eyes, he saw Ji Zhen’s tear-streaked face; when he closed them, the word “divorce” reverberated in his mind.
The more he tried to find peace, the more his heart was troubled.
Shen Yanqing had calculated everything, predicting that Ji Zhen would cry and make a scene with him and that he would beg him to save Ji Jue. But he had not predicted that the Ji Zhen who loved him would willingly want to separate from him.
He had believed that the truth would eventually surface and that he could handle it calmly, yet when the moment arrived, he found it painfully hard to confront Ji Zhen’s tearful accusations.
He could have easily used a few firm words to shut Ji Zhen up.
The dethroning of the crown prince and the fall of the Ji family were inevitable. No one could turn the tide. Even if it was what the emperor wished for, Shen Yanqing could not deny, despite how eloquently he could argue, that his actions had played a part in it.
A rift between him and Ji Zhen was bound to happen.
Shen Yanqing looked up at the weak sun outside the window, and his mind was in turmoil.
To save or not to save was a decision made in a single thought. One small mistake could bring disaster upon him. But one thing was certain: even if he kept Ji Zhen locked within this courtyard, he could never divorce him or allow him to leave.
As for the reason, there was no need to overthink it, it was simply that “love is a matter of the heart.”
At dusk, the main courtyard of the Shen Mansion was as quiet as a tomb.
Ji Zhen had already vented his anger, cursed, and made a scene, but the servants who once feared him now paid him no mind, guarding the courtyard entrance like gatekeepers, making it impossible for him to take a single step.
After multiple failed attempts to leave, Ji Zhen was exhausted. He sat motionlessly on a stool, his once lustrous eyes swollen from crying, and his cheeks slightly stinging from being soaked in tears for so long.
As Ji Zhen’s personal attendant, Ji An naturally couldn’t go anywhere either.
He brought hot water and gently used a soft cloth to wipe Ji Zhen’s face while grumbling, “Those dogs who rely on others’ power even dare to bully the Young Master? If only the Eldest Young Master were still here…”
Ji Zhen’s pupils slowly moved, and his moist, long eyelashes trembled slightly. “When you scold them, aren’t you also scolding me?”
“Young Master?”
Ji Zhen pursed his lips. “I used to always feel that with my father and elder brother protecting me, I had nothing to fear. Now that I think about it, I was just a fox using a tiger’s power. Without the Ji family, I am nothing…”
He had once tasted the benefits of his family’s status, and now that they had fallen, he had to suffer the bitter backlash of that power.
Ji An said with distress, “Young Master, don’t talk about yourself like that.”
Ji Zhen hung his head, and large tears fell onto his legs. “Ji An, I am so worried about Gege. I’ve heard that the imperial prison is bitterly cold, with spoiled food and sour, undrinkable water. There might even be rats… Will they torture Gege? Will Gege die?”
Ji An spat twice in superstition. “The Eldest Young Master is a good person and will be blessed by the heavens!”
“The day after tomorrow is the fifteenth,” Ji Zhen murmured, looking up. “Ji An, I have to get out.”
Ji An lowered his voice. “Young Master, please leave the capital with the Young General. Back then, you and the Young General missed a prime opportunity, and I’m certain the Eldest Young Master also considered it a great pity.” He wiped his nose. “This is also the Eldest Young Master’s…”
He couldn’t bring himself to say the words “last wish.”
Ji Zhen looked at the twilight sky and fell into silence again.
The author has something to say:
To Lord Shen: I’ll tell you a secret—your wife is planning to run away with his ex-fiancé!
