The aftermath of spending two days glued together was that, as soon as they were apart, Lu Ze couldn’t stop missing Liang Xiao. But with Lu Ze having classes and Liang Xiao having work, their only chance to meet was usually over dinner. Most of the time, Lu Ze would go to Liang Xiao to save him the trouble of commuting back and forth.
“Ze, can you stop running off every day?” Sun Zhuoyu complained. “When was the last time we had dinner together?”
Lu Ze adjusted his hair in front of the mirror and replied dismissively, “We’ve been eating together for two years. I’ve only had a few meals with Xiao-ge.”
Mao Xin leaned over the railing of his bunk bed, looking down. “Ze-ge, do you really like Xiao-ge that much?”
Lu Ze paused for a moment before finally giving them some attention. “Why do you say that?”
“I’ve never been in a relationship, so I don’t really get it,” Mao Xin said. “But I feel like you’re completely different since you started dating Xiao-ge.”
“He’s right,” Sun Zhuoyu added. “It’s like you’re dating for the first time.”
Lu Ze chuckled. “Alright, I’m leaving now. Do you guys need me to bring anything back?”
“Mangosteen! I want mangosteen!” Mao Xin said.
“I want spicy duck tongues,” Sun Zhuoyu added.
Lu Ze clicked his tongue and gave them an “OK” gesture. “Wait for me.”
Humming a tune as he walked, Lu Ze practically skipped down the stairs to the dormitory entrance. But as soon as he looked up, he saw Jiang Yijie standing not far away.
The smile on Lu Ze’s face faded slightly as he tried to appear less cheerful. “Jie-ge? What are you doing here?”
“Waiting for you,” Jiang Yijie replied.
Lu Ze hesitated for a moment before reluctantly walking over. “What’s up?”
Jiang Yijie stared at him for a while, looking like he wanted to say something but couldn’t bring himself to. Lu Ze already had a good idea of what he wanted to ask.
So he said it for him: “You want to ask about me and Liang Xiao?”
Jiang Yijie nodded slightly.
Taking a deep breath, Lu Ze said, “Jie-ge, we’re together now… I’m sorry.”
Jiang Yijie stared at him with a complicated expression for a long moment before forcing a weak smile. His voice was hoarse as he said, “You told me not to apologize before—so why are you saying it now?”
Because Lu Ze did feel guilty—but only guilty. There was no room for anything more than that.
Looking at Jiang Yijie’s tired face, Lu Ze hesitated before asking, “Are you sick?”
“Just tired from studying,” Jiang Yijie said, offering an excuse neither of them believed.
“Take care of yourself,” Lu Ze said. “The holidays are coming soon. For these next two months… I won’t contact you. I hope you can move on quickly.”
Lu Ze knew his words were harsh, but dragging things out would only be crueler.
It took Jiang Yijie a long time to respond with a quiet acknowledgment.
“Alright then, I’ll be going.” Lu Ze turned and left.
Jiang Yijie stood frozen in place as Lu Ze brushed past him. A few steps later, Lu Ze heard Jiang Yijie call his name, “Lu Ze.”
Lu Ze stopped in his tracks. Jiang Yijie turned around and caught up to him, asking, “Can I ask you a question?”
“Go ahead.”
Jiang Yijie’s eyes were slightly red as he asked, “I’ve known you for five years, and you’ve only known Liang Xiao for a few days. Why… why was it so easy for you to fall for him?”
Lu Ze pressed his lips together and thought for a long time before answering, “If I had met him earlier, I think I would’ve realized I was gay much sooner.”
—
“Baby?” Liang Xiao called softly, afraid of startling Lu Ze.
Lu Ze snapped out of his thoughts. “Hmm?”
“You’ve been zoning out while eating,” Liang Xiao said with a smile. “Careful not to choke on a bone.”
Lu Ze spit out the bone in his mouth. “Are you done eating? You barely ate anything today.”
“I had a late lunch,” Liang Xiao admitted honestly. “I’m not very hungry.”
Lu Ze frowned slightly. “You can’t keep eating like this—it’s not good for you.”
“Mm, I know,” Liang Xiao replied. “I usually eat on time. It’s only occasionally that I eat late.”
Liang Xiao hadn’t cared about these things before, but Lu Ze did—he worried that Liang Xiao might overwork himself. So now Liang Xiao made an effort to be more mindful and not let Lu Ze worry.
He stared at Lu Ze for a moment before asking, “Did something happen today? You seem a little off.”
Lu Ze sighed and smiled faintly. “Is it that obvious?”
“Yes,” Liang Xiao said, tracing an arc in the air with his finger. “When we first met up today, your eyes weren’t smiling like this.”
This time, Lu Ze smiled genuinely—his eyes curving into crescents and sparkling brightly. “It’s nothing serious. Seeing you makes everything better.”
Since Lu Ze didn’t want to elaborate, Liang Xiao didn’t press further. “Let’s go. We still have some time—I’ll go with you to the supermarket.”
They pushed a cart together and first picked up the spicy duck tongues and mangosteen that Lu Ze’s dormmates had requested. Then Liang Xiao added some plain milk for Lu Ze. “Finals are exhausting—you should take care of yourself.”
Lu Ze slung an arm around Liang Xiao’s neck and swayed playfully. “Do I look tired? You’re the one who needs it more—you stay up late every night.”
With that, he started piling cartons of milk into the cart: plain milk, goat milk, yogurt drinks, walnut milk, and even flavored milk drinks like Wangzai Milk.
Liang Xiao sighed helplessly. “What are you doing?”
“Two cartons a day—it’s not much; you’ll finish them quickly.”
“When your break starts, I’ll finally get some rest,” Liang Xiao said.
Pushing the cart forward, Lu Ze asked, “Will you go home for a bit when the holidays start?”
Liang Xiao’s hometown was in a small third- or fourth-tier city nearby—just under an hour away by high-speed train.
“It depends on your plans,” Liang Xiao replied. “It’s easy for me to go home anytime.”
“How about I go with you?” Lu Ze suggested. “We won’t tell Auntie about our relationship—just say I’m your friend visiting for fun.”
He turned to look at Liang Xiao deliberately after saying this and asked, “What do you think?”
Liang Xiao ruffled his hair gently and said with a smile, “Why not? It’s just… there’s not much fun stuff to do where I live.”
“It’s fine. I’m not going there to have fun anyway—I’m going to meet the great mother of my boyfriend,” Lu Ze said, pausing for a moment. “…I just hope this great mother won’t be too angry when she finds out about us.”
Liang Xiao laughed, and in his mind, he could immediately hear Jiang Qing calling him a “little rascal.” “She… has a bit of a temper, but she’s not old-fashioned. Don’t worry—I’ll find the right time to tell her in advance.”
Lu Ze looked at him in shock. “Don’t! If you tell her, how will I dare to go? Don’t say anything—really, don’t.”
“She’s going to find out sooner or later.”
Liang Xiao’s tone was casual, as if he were discussing what to eat tomorrow. But Lu Ze froze for a moment.
“Xiao-ge.”
“Hmm?”
Lu Ze pulled Liang Xiao’s hand off the shopping cart handle and intertwined their fingers tightly until their palms were perfectly pressed together.
Liang Xiao looked down at their joined hands as Lu Ze spread his fingers and then gripped tightly again, tapping twice on the back of Liang Xiao’s hand. “Let’s go.”
After a moment of silence, Liang Xiao suddenly said, “You don’t need to tell your family yet…”
“You don’t have to worry about that,” Lu Ze said. “My parents are very open-minded. Besides, my dad already knows.”
Liang Xiao was stunned and stared at him in disbelief.
Lu Ze reached out and pinched Liang Xiao’s slightly open mouth shut, teasing him. “When we’re on break, I’ll take you to my house. You can meet him then.”
After a few minutes of processing this, Liang Xiao suddenly said, “I remember you mentioned your dad is cool?”
“Yep,” Lu Ze replied casually. “Smokes, drinks, fights, races cars, has tattoos—there’s nothing he didn’t do when he was young. But he turned over a new leaf later on and now just works out and practices boxing.”
Liang Xiao stared at the back of Lu Ze’s head, finally catching on. He chuckled softly and said, “Baby, you’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you?”
Without turning around, Lu Ze snapped his fingers and said with a grin, “That’s right, Xiao-Xiao.”
—
Finals always seemed to pass quickly under normal circumstances, but being in a relationship made time fly even faster. Before they knew it, exam days had arrived.
Liang Xiao accompanied Lu Ze for a meal at the school cafeteria. “Starting tomorrow, I won’t work during the day anymore,” Liang Xiao said.
Lu Ze immediately looked up at him. Liang Xiao continued, “So I can be there for your exams.”
“You don’t have to go out of your way for me…” Lu Ze replied. “But you really should take a break.”
“I don’t have much to do at home anyway,” Liang Xiao said with a small smile. “I’d rather spend the time with you.”
Lu Ze nodded but hesitated for a moment before asking cautiously, “Xiao-ge… I’ve never asked you this before… but right now…”
“How much do I still owe Jiang Heng?” Liang Xiao finished for him.
“Yeah.”
“About fifty thousand.”
That number was something Liang Xiao calculated every day.
Fifty thousand wasn’t a huge amount for someone from Lu Ze’s family background. It also wouldn’t have been difficult for Liang Xiao to earn quickly in the past.
But since Liang Xiao had given up his previous job to be with Lu Ze, it was uncertain how long it would take him now to pay it off.
After the holidays, Lu Ze wanted to go out and have fun with Liang Xiao, which would mean spending even more money. Both of them fell silent for a moment. Liang Xiao seemed to notice what Lu Ze was thinking and picked up a piece of sweet and sour pork from his plate, placing it on Lu Ze’s.
“Why aren’t you eating? It’s pretty good,” Lu Ze said.
“There’s an ulcer in my mouth—it’s a bit hard to eat,” Liang Xiao replied.
“Open your mouth, let me see.”
Liang Xiao pulled down his lower lip to show him. Lu Ze frowned with concern. “That’s a big one. You need to get more vitamins.”
Liang Xiao looked at him and said softly, “Baby.”
Lu Ze clicked his tongue but didn’t respond.
Liang Xiao smirked slightly. “Ze-ge.”
“Hmm?” Lu Ze responded.
“You don’t need to worry about this,” Liang Xiao said in a calm voice. “I know I have to pay back the money, but I’m only doing it with the savings left after covering my own expenses. So you don’t have to feel burdened—just live as you normally would. Jiang Heng isn’t a loan shark. Even if I take my time paying him back, it’s fine—he won’t pressure me.”
Lu Ze stared at Liang Xiao silently. There wasn’t much expression on Liang Xiao’s face, but somehow he exuded a sense of reliability. If Lu Ze hadn’t seen how anxious he used to be about repaying the debt, he might have believed him completely.
Just as Lu Ze was about to speak, Liang Xiao cut him off. “I’m really not in a hurry to pay it back anymore.”
Lu Ze paused for a moment before smiling faintly. “Are you the worm in my stomach or something?”
Liang Xiao laughed too but winced slightly as it pulled on his ulcer. Lu Ze noticed immediately and quickly said, “Stop laughing! Don’t hurt yourself.”
Liang Xiao suppressed his smile and spoke seriously again. “It’s true. I used to be in such a rush to pay off the debt because I didn’t have anything else more important in my life. So I thought I’d just clear it as quickly as possible. But now…”
He trailed off and looked directly into Lu Ze’s eyes. For the first time, Lu Ze noticed how pure Liang Xiao’s gaze was.
In those eyes, he could see unfiltered, unmistakable affection—bright and unhidden.
Lu Ze’s heart began racing, and he guessed Liang Xiao’s was too because he had started nervously pressing his lips together.
“Now, liking you properly is the most important thing.”
Lu Ze had always thought of the cafeteria as a noisy place filled with the mixed aromas of delicious food—a space brimming with everyday life.
And yet here, amidst this ordinary scene of bustling activity, his beloved boyfriend had just said something so simple yet so heart-fluttering.
Yes—heart-fluttering.
Although Liang Xiao probably didn’t think of it as romantic words, they were heartfelt—genuine, unreserved, honest, and sincere.
And that made them romantic words—the kind that were beautiful and deeply moving.
After waiting for his heartbeat to settle down, Lu Ze finally spoke. “Xiao-ge, this is your first relationship, and you’re taking it so seriously… What if… I’m just messing around?”
Liang Xiao’s gaze darkened slightly as he looked at Lu Ze. Even though he had never been in a relationship before, he understood that many people nowadays treated relationships casually.
They might start dating because someone looked good or because they felt lonely—relationships that didn’t require deep understanding to begin and didn’t leave lingering attachments when they ended.
True mutual affection, where both people want to seriously commit and move forward together, is rare.
“You’re not that kind of person…” Liang Xiao started.
“I used to be,” Lu Ze interrupted. “I’ve been in many relationships before, and they all ended easily. I barely even experienced what heartbreak feels like.”
Liang Xiao pressed his lips together, his face expressionless as he looked at Lu Ze. Just as Lu Ze was starting to feel like he had made things too serious and wanted to lighten the mood, Liang Xiao suddenly smiled and said, “Are you done eating? Let’s go.”
Lu Ze hadn’t expected this reaction at all. As they walked out of the cafeteria into the blazing sunlight, Liang Xiao took off his hat and placed it on Lu Ze’s head as if nothing had happened. “To block the sun.”
Lu Ze felt a pang of guilt in his chest. He had said those things to tell Liang Xiao not to give so much of himself so unreservedly. He wanted Liang Xiao to know that he genuinely liked him and wasn’t just playing around. But what if it were someone else? Someone who wasn’t as serious? Someone who would hurt him? A person like Liang Xiao would always end up being the one who got hurt in a relationship.
Now, seeing Liang Xiao’s reaction, Lu Ze regretted saying anything at all. Why did he have to bring it up? Right now, it was him who was with Liang Xiao—no one else, and there wouldn’t be anyone else.
“Xiao-ge, I didn’t mean…”
Liang Xiao suddenly stopped walking and turned to look at Lu Ze. “You said it yourself—that was in the past.”
Lu Ze froze for a moment.
“In the past, you hadn’t met me yet.”
Since being with Lu Ze, Liang Xiao had always been thoughtful, gentle, and attentive. Lu Ze rarely saw him display confidence, assertiveness, or even a bit of arrogance.
He had assumed this was just how Liang Xiao was—like an Oreo cookie: cool and dark on the outside but soft and sweet on the inside. But in that moment, he realized he was wrong.
The filling could be black or white—it depended on who picked up the cookie and what mood it was in.
When they got back to the dormitory, as soon as the door closed behind them, Liang Xiao pushed Lu Ze against it and kissed him.
The kiss was intense—Liang Xiao’s hands gripped Lu Ze’s lower back tightly, and his teeth bit down on Lu Ze’s lower lip with force.
Lu Ze didn’t resist; he let Liang Xiao kiss him urgently until his hat fell to the ground. Only then did Liang Xiao stop, looking down at Lu Ze’s lips, which now bore a faint bite mark.
“Does it hurt?” Lu Ze asked.
Liang Xiao froze for a moment, confused about how Lu Ze had managed to voice exactly what he was feeling inside.
Lu Ze gently brushed his thumb against the corner of Liang Xiao’s mouth. “Your ulcer—does it hurt?”
A sharp pang of emotion surged through Liang Xiao’s chest—an ache mixed with guilt and tenderness. He replied softly, “It doesn’t hurt… Did I hurt you?”
Lu Ze licked his lower lip. “You’re pretty intense, huh, Xiao-ge?”
Liang Xiao leaned in and pressed his lips lightly against Lu Ze’s again. “I’m sorry…”
Suddenly, a knock came from inside the bathroom, startling both of them.
Mao Xin’s voice called out softly from behind the door: “Uh… Ze-ge… Xiao-ge… could you maybe wait until I’m out before continuing?”
No one said a word. Mao Xin cautiously pushed the bathroom door open, sticking his head out. His face was bright red as he coughed twice and stammered, “I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop! I-I-I was just using the bathroom! How was I supposed to know you two would start kissing as soon as you got back…”
Silence. More silence.
Mao Xin braced himself and stepped out of the bathroom, feeling as though both Lu Ze’s and Liang Xiao’s gazes were sharp enough to silence him permanently.
He quickly covered his eyes. “I swear I didn’t see anything!”
After two seconds, he realized that wasn’t enough and switched to covering his ears. “I didn’t hear anything either!”
Clutching his ears, he bolted toward the door. “Let me out!”
Lu Ze and Liang Xiao stepped aside to make way for him.
Mao Xin yanked the dorm room door open and blurted out in a rush, “I’m leaving! I’m leaving! I don’t know anything! You guys carry on!”
With that, he slammed the door shut behind him with a loud bang.
Lu Ze and Liang Xiao exchanged a glance, the air between them feeling impossibly still.
After a long pause, Lu Ze tried to break the awkwardness by saying, “I think… this door is going to break one day…”
Before he could finish his sentence, something fell onto his head. Startled, he froze for a moment before reaching up to touch it—it was a piece of wall plaster.
Both of them instinctively looked up at the ceiling. Lu Ze muttered one word to sum up his feelings: “Shit!”
And then, as if on cue, they both burst into laughter.
