“It’s just a cicada, it’s fine. They’re not pests. I was just too focused on drawing. Don’t blame them, please don’t kill the bugs, alright?” The voice by his ear was soft and sweet, with a pleading tone. The boy’s warm breath brushed against his ear, making it feel more like he was coaxing him.
Tunshe Nalin couldn’t help but tense up. Though his heart had long ceased to beat, a faint disturbance stirred in his silent chest, like a wild beast tumbling into a deep, ancient well, thrashing and struggling to escape. But the moment his fingers tightened around the boy’s waist and hips, they brushed against the still-developing, delicate bones. His reason snapped back into place at once.
The lover he had waited so long for had not yet grown up, he was still just a child. He couldn’t burden him with the weight of past memories or the overwhelming emotions that could easily consume the person he was today for now. Tunshe Nalin often felt deeply grateful that, over the past decade of raising Mi Jia, the once completely deranged version of himself had gradually returned to being a normal person.
If he had still been consumed by madness, he probably would’ve lost control last year, or even the year before, when Mi Jia had just grown into the exact image of how he looked the first time they met.
He carefully laid the boy down on the sofa, but the arms wrapped around his neck still refused to let go. Tunshe Nalin gently patted his back. “Be good, I’m going to get the ointment.”
As he watched his adoptive father kneel in front of the sofa with the medical kit, Na Ran couldn’t help but lick his canine tooth, then yanked his pant leg all the way up to the base of his thigh, revealing the edge of his white underwear. The triangle briefs were a Western style that had just become popular, and they were bought for him by his godfather.
Tunshe Nalin’s hand, holding the cotton swab, paused for a brief moment. With his other hand, he gently pulled the boy’s pant leg back down, leaving only the injured spot exposed, and began to carefully dab on the iodine. Na Ran bit his lip, then slowly reached up to remove his sunglasses, revealing those narrow, blood-red eyes.
“Why is Godfather wearing this at home? I’m not afraid.”
Tunshe Nalin kept his gaze lowered, calm and composed, not even lifting his eyelids. He covered the wound with gauze and was about to get up when the boy suddenly grabbed his sleeve.
“Godfather — I want to take a bath. My leg hurts, I can’t move well. Carry me.”
Those crimson eyes lowered, their gaze soft yet laced with a trace of helplessness. “It’s just a scrape, not even a sprain. Why are you being so delicate?”
“I’m not being delicate, I just got scared, and my legs are weak.”
Tunshe Nalin sighed, bending down to pick him up horizontally. He didn’t notice that the sly little fox in his arms had a look of complete satisfaction on his face. If he had a tail, it would probably be sticking straight up by now. Unfortunately, the short walk from the living room to the bathroom took only a few steps, far too little time for Na Ran to fully enjoy being cradled in his adoptive father’s arms. He was soon placed on the built-in bathtub ledge.
“The wound can’t get wet, so no soaking today. Just wash your hands and face, do you understand?”
“Help me wash—”
Before he could finish speaking, the man, who had spent countless nights soothing him to sleep, helping him bathe, dress, and even tie his shoes, lowered his lashes and, without hesitation, refused him.
“No, you’re not a child anymore.”
The bathroom door was closed, and Na Ran opened his mouth, his eyes reddening slightly.
Tunshe Nalin was deliberately distancing himself from him.
When did this start?
It probably started on the night of his fourteenth birthday. At that time, his godfather hadn’t yet suggested that they sleep separately, they still slept together. He didn’t realize that the feelings he had developed for the man who had raised him went beyond mere dependency. His first spring dream came unexpectedly. In the dream, under the bright red and drooping hibiscus tree, the man, who was much older than him, appeared as a youth about his age, with deep, sea-blue eyes, they were pure and affectionate. They embraced each other tightly with their lips meeting. Later, after reading a comic, he learned that what they’d shared was called a kiss. Then, the two of them ran to the riverbank, shed their clothes, and entwined with each other like a pair of snakes. At that time, he didn’t understand what they were doing, but when he woke up, his lower body was a mess, and he was clinging to his godfather’s body like an octopus. He still remembered it clearly.
From that night on, Tunshe Nalin and he slept separately.
He didn’t know exactly when these feelings for his godfather began, but he knew that from the moment he became aware of his gender, he had no interest in girls. From time to time, a handsome boy might catch his eye. After all, in the aristocratic school, there was no shortage of young masters with impressive backgrounds and striking looks. He wasn’t lacking in admirers, but none of them ever truly made his heart skip a beat. And it was no surprise, he had been raised under the care of Tunshe Nalin from a young age. His godfather possessed a godlike, handsome appearance, vast knowledge that seemed boundless, and meticulous care for him. How could anyone else compete for his attention in his eyes?
As for what kind of feelings Tunshe Nalin held — since he became aware, he had asked about his origins and received the answer that he was the son of a benefactor. Since he was entrusted to be raised by his benefactor, it was likely that aside from a sense of gratitude, there was also a sense of responsibility. Even after all these years, raising a pet could also bring out some affection, let alone raising a child. However, that affection would definitely not be the kind he hoped for… He was just a child, and a boy at that. Tunshe Nalin was handsome and wealthy and had been willing to remain single for over ten years to raise him out of gratitude, but that didn’t mean he would remain alone forever.
In the future, what if he finds him a godmother?
Na Ran couldn’t even bear to think about it. Just the thought of it made his heart ache as though it were being torn out, and he could feel tears threatening to spill at any moment.
