After returning home, Ye Yuhuan changed out of her sophisticated black business suit and wiped off her lipstick. The takeout she had ordered arrived just in time. After eating, she put on her usual clothes, grabbed a large bag of snacks from the coffee table, and went out again to a cake shop to buy two mango mille-crêpes before heading to the psychiatric hospital.
She was going to see her aunt, Si Shan.
She had been too busy lately, and her visits to her aunt were always rushed. Most of the time, she needed her aunt to sign some documents during her lucid moments. But now that the most urgent matter was finished, Ye Yuhuan finally had time to properly spend with her.
After she started getting paid to attend Qinglin, Ye Yuhuan had moved her aunt to a better psychiatric hospital. The environment here was very good, and the nurses were gentler, which greatly helped stabilize her aunt’s mood. At least now, her aunt’s lucid periods were longer than before.
Eight years ago, after Ye Yuhuan’s maternal grandmother passed away, their relatives from the Si family in Sichuan Province suggested sending Si Shan to a psychiatric hospital. Si Shan was unwilling, but the relatives refused to keep a mentally ill person in their home. Left with no choice, Si Shan could only take her inheritance and seek refuge with her sister, Si Zhen, who had married far from home. Si Zhen had a job, so the task of caring for Si Shan sometimes fell to a very young Ye Yuhuan. In Ye Yuhuan’s eyes back then, her aunt was her playmate when she had an episode and her guardian when she was lucid—both roles she was very fond of.
Later, when Si Zhen’s own mental state began to destabilize, Si Shan was sent to a psychiatric hospital. Ye Yuhuan was dejected for a long time. Her love for reading had been cultivated under her aunt’s influence.
Si Shan developed schizophrenia while in university. She was cured once, but it relapsed a few years later, and she began to fantasize that she was a Barbie doll. She had her normal moments, but because the onset of her episodes was unpredictable, she couldn’t be left without a caretaker. Moreover, during that period, Si Zhen would fly into rages for no reason, frightening the already-suffering Si Shan to tears. Si Shan thought she was encountering a fiery dragon. Under these circumstances, the psychiatric hospital became the only option.
This time, Ye Yuhuan hadn’t specifically chosen a time when Si Shan was lucid. As it happened, Si Shan was currently holding a dress and asking a nurse, “Why won’t you dress me?”
The nurse was clearly familiar with Si Shan’s behavior. She crouched down to be at eye level with Si Shan and said gently, “Because you’re already wearing a pretty dress.”
Si Shan shook her head and corrected her, “No, that’s not right! How can a Barbie doll wear just one dress!”
Ye Yuhuan slowly walked over to Si Shan’s side and took out the mango mille-crêpe, a favorite of Barbie-mode Si Shan, to tempt her. “Who wants to eat some cake?”
“Miss Ye, you’re here.” Seeing her, the nurse stepped aside.
Ye Yuhuan thanked the nurse. Just then, Si Shan cheered, “Shanshan wants to eat cake!”
While unwrapping the cake, Ye Yuhuan turned her head to the nurse and said, “Nurse, I’ll watch her. I’ll call you if I need anything. I’d like to speak with my aunt alone for a bit.”
The nurse agreed and left. Before closing the door, she couldn’t help but glance back at Ye Yuhuan, sighing to herself. How could such a pretty young girl have such a miserable life? In all this time, she had never seen anyone else visit Si Shan. It meant that at such a young age, the girl had shouldered the heavy responsibility of caring for her aunt.
Seeing the nurse was gone, Si Shan pouted. “Where’s Auntie Wang? She just promised to change my clothes!”
Ye Yuhuan forked a small piece of cake and fed it to Si Shan, coaxing her softly, “Auntie Wang went to eat her own little cake.”
“Shanshan can share her cake with Auntie Wang! Huanhuan, can you ask Auntie Wang to come back, please?”
“But I don’t know where Auntie Wang went to eat her cake. How about we wait for her to come back, and then we can give her the other little cake, okay?”
Si Shan nodded sweetly. She looked very much like Si Zhen, both having delicate and gentle features. Even at nearly forty, her childlike expressions didn’t seem out of place.
Ye Yuhuan spent over two hours with Si Shan, braiding her hair into intricate little braids. Just as she was playing Si Shan’s favorite game, Miracle Nikki, with her, Si Shan suddenly broke free from her fantasy. She smiled warmly, glanced at the braids covering her head, and said with a helpless sigh, “Huanhuan, you don’t have to do this every time.”
Ye Yuhuan leaned back on the sofa, relaxing, and said casually, “The doctor said it’s best to keep you happy. It helps you get better faster.”
“This illness of mine… it’s been so many years. I don’t know if it’ll ever get better.” Si Shan sighed bitterly.
On this topic, however, Ye Yuhuan was inexplicably certain. “Auntie, you will get better. If you can’t get better now, I’ll cure you in the future.”
Si Shan was rather surprised to hear this and asked, “Are you still planning to study psychology?”
Ye Yuhuan nodded. “I’ve always planned on it.”
“Seeing how you’ve been lately, I thought you were going to switch to economics,” Si Shan teased.
Si Shan had only seen glimpses of Ye Yuhuan’s recent busyness, but it was enough to get the picture. Ever since her sister passed away, she had never seen her niece in such a hurry. Before, Ye Yuhuan did everything at a leisurely pace, as if she had no desires in this world.
According to Ye Yuhuan, it was all for a friend. Si Shan was very gratified. She should have had a friend long ago. A child who grows up in that kind of family is always too lonely.
Ye Yuhuan told her aunt about what she’d been up to recently. She mentioned everything except for her discovery that the world was a novel. Si Shan ruffled Ye Yuhuan’s hair and said softly, “It seems you’ve made a very good friend.”
Hearing this, Ye Yuhuan gave a faint smile. “Yes. I really should have befriended her sooner.”
Seeing that her niece, while having more of a human touch than before, still seemed to keep a distance from others, Si Shan couldn’t help but advise, “With friends, you have to trust them. Don’t always keep everything bottled up inside, acting as if it has nothing to do with anyone else. That’s very unfair to your friends.”
“Huanhuan, don’t let what happened with your parents make you give up on having expectations for other people. You still have such a long life ahead of you.”
Perhaps because Si Shan had witnessed Ye Yuhuan’s entire upbringing, her words always managed to touch upon her inner struggles. If anyone else had said these things, Ye Yuhuan would have certainly denied them, explaining that it wasn’t the case—that she hadn’t changed because of her parents, but rather, her parents had made her realize that this was just how things were. If the world was inherently this terrible, then her defensive posture was merely being prepared.
But Si Shan was just like her name. Her life was full of twists and hardships, yet she always faced them with peace and treated everyone and everything with gentleness. In her presence, Ye Yuhuan’s own cold logic about the world was forced to fail.
After saying goodbye to her aunt, Ye Yuhuan walked along the small stone path in front of the hospital. The hospital had beautiful scenery. On a nearby hillside was a grove of maple trees, which, come autumn, would be a tapestry of color, a truly charming sight.
Si Shan loved beautiful scenery. She had once been a very promising painter but was forced to put down her brush because of her illness. However, her innate pursuit of beauty was never lost. This was also why Ye Yuhuan, even when she became more financially comfortable, chose not to move her aunt to a more high-end hospital.
This was just her personality. She didn’t have high demands for life; “suitable” was good enough. She would never trade discomfort for uncertain happiness.
However, Song Zhiqing was always like this.
She had lost count of how many times Song Zhiqing had exposed her vulnerability in front of her. Ye Yuhuan had always believed that showing one’s vulnerability was a dangerous thing, not just for oneself, but for others as well.
If one person offers an expectation, and the other person fails to meet it, then the first person loses that expectation, and the other person is forever someone who couldn’t meet it.
Each time, Ye Yuhuan had properly soothed Song Zhiqing’s anxieties, to the point that Song Zhiqing could candidly reveal her past. After all, the childhood Song Zhiqing described had its bright spots, but also its shadows.
Her faint dissatisfaction and resentment toward her parents alone was not something one could easily show to others.
Song Zhiqing had set an example for her, showing her that it wasn’t dangerous at all. Her aunt had also said it wasn’t dangerous.
Ye Yuhuan looked at the maple grove. The leaves were gradually beginning to turn red; it would soon be their most beautiful time of the year.
Ye Yuhuan couldn’t help but wonder, And what about me? Will there be a day when I, too, can find happiness through honesty?
At this thought, she couldn’t help but laugh. What is wrong with me? Song Zhiqing and I have only been friends for a month!
Speak of the devil. Just as Ye Yuhuan was pondering her relationship with Song Zhiqing, she received a call from her.
“Hello? What’s up?”
“Hey, did something happy happen? Your tone sounds different from usual.”
“I just went to see my aunt and we chatted for a while.”
“Then your aunt must be a wonderful person, to actually make a great fairy like you crack a smile.”
“What are you talking about? ‘Great fairy’ is a bit much!”
“I’m not just making it up. That’s what everyone on the school forum calls you. They say you’re a true fairy.”
“That’s just so weird. It seems like a compliment, but I don’t feel the slightest bit of joy from being praised.”
“That’s what fairies are like—devoid of sorrow and joy!”
“Song Zhiqing, that’s enough.”
The two of them chatted idly for a while before Song Zhiqing finally remembered the reason for her call. She said excitedly, “Ye Yuhuan, listen to this! I told my mom about the ‘Care for Lin Qi’ campaign I’m organizing, and she actually said she’d record a VCR to help promote it! Ahhhhhh! Our campaign is definitely going to be a huge success!”
Ye Yuhuan hadn’t expected Gao Yiren to go this far for her daughter. Gao Yiren’s social influence was international, yet here she was, endorsing a small school campaign. But then again, Ye Yuhuan thought, Gao Yiren probably agreed to film this because she hopes there will be more people like Song Zhiqing in the world.
“Oh, and also! My dad said he’s going to set up a related foundation, so the campaign’s scope won’t be limited to just Qinglin. We can help more people like Lin Qi!”
Ah, it seems Gao Yiren’s involvement really is on another level.
Ye Yuhuan let out a “wow” and replied with a smile, “Then we’d better do a great job.”
“Mhm!” Song Zhiqing nodded emphatically.
Everything that happened today gave her a floating sensation. It was hard to describe the reason why. After thinking it over, Song Zhiqing finally said in a dreamlike tone, “Ye Yuhuan, are we about to do something really amazing?”
Ye Yuhuan’s voice was gentle. “We were always going to do something amazing.”
