Zhou Mu showed a hint of gloating expression behind You Qi.
If he was a Bai Le Snake, then being a little dumb was understandable. The vital point of a snake demon wasn’t at seven inches but at the head. In fights, everyone aimed for the head, so after getting hit enough times, naturally, they’d be dumb.
Besides, Bai Le Snakes were called that because they would come out and chirp every spring, their sounds resembling silk and bamboo instruments. The entire species had a ‘keep playing the music, keep dancing’ kind of happy vibe.
Zhou Mu even darkly thought, If humans captured this type of snake, they’d probably force them to play the soundtrack for Fight the Landlord.
Unaware that his intelligence had already been dissected and stereotyped by Zhou Mu, Chun Shijiu was burning with rage, especially at You Qi’s mocking expression, which felt like it carried more than one layer of ridicule.
But if you lost your temper now, you’d lose completely—so Chun Shijiu tried to keep his expression under control… Actually, never mind. He couldn’t.
Chun Shijiu cursed, “You think you’re not dumb? Didn’t you see how fast that little ‘Terracotta Soldier’ was climbing the stairs? Does that look like something that’s been buried in the dirt for over two thousand years? A measly dog bite, and it still hasn’t healed after so long? Bet it’s because he’s been having too much fun riding the fierce beast You Qi as his mount and doesn’t want to heal. ‘Terracotta Soldier,’ you better watch out—soon, all your flesh will be used as fuel costs!”
Chun Shijiu had originally come downstairs to pay the electricity bill. Before leaving, he tossed out one last sarcastic remark: “You’re not dumb? Wow, you’re so smart.”
As long as he ran away right after saying that, he’d win.
Zhou Mu: “……”
Zhou Mu was a little pissed at being exposed. He glared at Chun Shijiu’s back and muttered indignantly, “Everyone has their own struggles, don’t you understand?!”
After that, Zhou Mu slowly raised his head, meeting You Qi’s gaze.
“You healed?” You Qi asked.
You Qi wasn’t blind; of course, he had seen Zhou Mu’s light-footed sprint up the stairs just now. He had simply chosen to help mock Chun Shijiu first.
“I’ve been fine for a while.” Zhou Mu felt a little guilty. “Sorry, but being a cripple meant I could just sit and eat without moving.”
Despite feeling guilty, he didn’t hide. In fact, he even stepped a little closer to You Qi, looking up with a pitiful expression.
You Qi didn’t say anything and simply started walking, hands in his pockets, his mood unreadable.
After realizing Zhou Mu’s leg was fine, You Qi didn’t feel the least bit angry. After all, Chun Shijiu didn’t know that he had voluntarily carried Zhou Mu around after meals when the guy could clearly walk.
When Zhou Mu started talking about his ‘struggles,’ You Qi even felt like laughing. He had long noticed that Zhou Mu was a bit spoiled and lazy.
As for why he was walking away with a blank expression now…
He just wanted to see what Zhou Mu would do.
Zhou Mu quickly caught up. “You can’t just listen to half of it! Didn’t you hear me tell Chun Shijiu earlier that I wanted to give you a gift? If I hadn’t been trying to find out what you like, why would I have lied to him?”
You Qi: “……”
You Qi couldn’t hold back anymore. He reached out and smacked Zhou Mu lightly on the back of the head, scolding, “Little liar.” He lowered his head, his hand still pressing against Zhou Mu’s head. “So, did you figure out what I like?”
“Nope. Chun Shijiu just made up a bunch of nonsense. But I did think of something to give you just now.” Zhou Mu smugly tugged at You Qi’s robe. “I noticed you always wear school robes. My family often orders suits from a human tailor—his craftsmanship is great. I’ll order one for you to switch things up. How about that?”
You Qi’s mood improved even more. He stuffed his hands back into his pockets and said casually, “Whatever.”
Zhou Mu grinned. “Haha, then that’s settled!”
Since the tailor was human, he wasn’t nearby. Zhou Mu had to send You Qi’s measurements over.
Back in dorm 1203, Zhou Mu turned to You Qi and said, “Take off your clothes.”
You Qi: “?”
Zhou Mu explained, “Custom tailoring requires measurements. Take off your outerwear, and I’ll take a look—I can tell your size just by looking.” He didn’t have a measuring tape on hand, but he was confident in his eye for measurements.
You Qi was skeptical.
Zhou Mu blurted out, “Really, I’m a living measuring tape spirit.”
You Qi couldn’t take it anymore and decisively started undoing his robe. Zhou Mu happily circled around him, observing.
You Qi stripped down to a tank top, his toned muscles well-defined. He kicked off his shoes, standing barefoot in the middle of the dorm, and handed his clothes to Zhou Mu. His slightly long bangs brushed over the metal muzzle, partially obscuring his deep black eyes. He put his hands on his belt—
Zhou Mu stared at him. “Wow.”
You Qi: “……”
Zhou Mu’s gaze didn’t waver. In fact, it became even bolder.
You Qi suddenly couldn’t take off his pants anymore. His ears, rarely betraying emotion, turned red. His hands stopped moving.
Zhou Mu clapped. “Nice, nice, very nice.”
Now he was just messing around. Zhou Mu had never seen a fierce beast get embarrassed before.
The next second, the silent You Qi moved—like a predator striking its prey, he pinned Zhou Mu down in an instant. He loomed over him, eyes flashing dangerously. The faint glint of sharp canine teeth peeked from his lips, exuding an overwhelming sense of menace…
But his ears were still visibly flushed red, which somewhat diminished the intimidation.
“You can’t bite me~” Zhou Mu teased, not scared at all. In fact, he seemed proud.
Maybe he saw through You Qi that he wouldn’t get angry because of his teasing jokes and he dared to joke about his muzzle.
You Qi stared into Zhou Mu’s bright apricot eyes, which were now slightly misted over from being startled. His thin eyelids had a hint of pink, making his gaze look even clearer. His lips parted slightly in an innocent expression. Every little detail seemed magnified in You Qi’s vision—he even recalled how soft Zhou Mu’s cheek had felt against him when he carried him before. His Adam’s apple bobbed.
Zhou Mu playfully said, “If you want to bite me, I’ll bite you too.”
As he spoke, he lightly nibbled on You Qi’s shoulder, leaving faint teeth marks.
You Qi’s heartbeat suddenly spiked!
It was probably the first time in his life someone had ever bit him. Instead of feeling annoyed, some unsatisfied craving stirred deep within him. The runes on his muzzle didn’t light up, so it wasn’t hunger—but You Qi did feel an overwhelming urge to break free of its restriction—
He leaned in, the cool metal of his muzzle brushing against Zhou Mu’s cheek. So close, yet still unable to cross that last inch. His Adam’s apple moved as he swallowed. “…You’re right,” You Qi murmured. “I can’t bite you.”
At such close range, Zhou Mu could sense You Qi’s body tensing, his blood rushing faster.
The word ‘bite’ was the same, but his regretful tone seemed to hold another layer of meaning. What was this?
Zhou Mu was usually very attuned to ‘greed,’ ‘desire,’ and the emotions they brought—but You Qi’s felt… different. As he tried to analyze it, You Qi had already pulled him up to sit.
Yu Qi pulled Zhou Mu up, crouching down with his hands resting on his knees, looking somewhat like a large canine. He lowered his head and muttered, “I’ll go borrow a measuring tape and take my own measurements.”
Zhou Mu blinked, lagging behind for a few beats before responding, “Oh… you’re heading out?”
……
The dorm manager of Building 5 was a ghost cultivator, making night shifts convenient. He had worked here for a long time, but this was the first time You Qi had ever knocked on his door, politely asking, “Teacher, do you have a measuring tape I could borrow?”
You Qi was always well-mannered when dealing with teachers. The dorm manager wasn’t sure why he needed a measuring tape, but he still rummaged through the toolbox and handed it over.
You Qi then added, “Teacher, the vending machine outside seems to have lost power. Could you check it?”
Technically, this wasn’t within the dorm manager’s duties, but under You Qi’s gaze, he found it hard to refuse. He floated over to take a look—everything seemed fine—so he simply smacked the machine twice. Miraculously, it powered back on.
“Haha, fixed!” The dorm manager clapped his hands.
Then, he watched in astonishment as You Qi—who rarely even appeared in the cafeteria—proceeded to buy juice, chips, bread, nuts… all sorts of snacks from the vending machine, practically clearing it out. He then carried the giant bag upstairs.
The dorm manager shook his head. This is what happens when you force a beast to eat vegetarian food—he’s now binge-eating snacks like a child, and with such a diverse selection, too. Hmm, this little detail should probably be added to the unofficial ‘Campus Fierce Beast Awareness Guide.’
Meanwhile, Zhou Mu was chatting with a tailor on WeChat, negotiating the price.
He planned to dip into his private savings to pay the deposit for now. Anyway, once the contract was signed, he’d have money, and custom-tailored suits took at least one to three months to be delivered.
Still, he wanted to be as thrifty as possible. He messaged the tailor, asking for a discount: [Give me a discount, or at least throw in a few extra shirts.]
Tailor: [ *pitiful* I can’t, boss, I’m barely making a profit here. It’s just labor costs…]
Zhou Mu, furious: [Lies! Not listening! I refuse to accept this unless I get something extra!!]
Tailor: […Fine, what do you want?]
Zhou Mu: [*cursing* *cursing* Leftover fabric scraps—make me some vests and ties or something!]
After much haggling, the tailor reluctantly agreed to throw in some extra handmade accessories. Zhou Mu even managed to get a free measuring tape and a pair of scissors out of the deal.
Satisfied, Zhou Mu only needed You Qi’s measurements now.
He was feeling quite grateful toward his roommate—bringing him snacks even after realizing he wasn’t actually injured anymore.
Thinking about how thoughtful You Qi was and how excited he was for his snacks, Zhou Mu ran to the dorm entrance, opening the door in anticipation. While waiting, he chatted with the guardian plant by the door: “Has Chun Shijiu come back yet? If you see him, yell at him for me.”
The guardian grass eagerly responded, “Don’t worry, I’m watching him.”
Before long, Zhou Mu saw You Qi walking up, carrying a massive bag of snacks. Delighted, he took a few steps forward to greet him.
Just then, Chun Shijiu appeared at the end of the hallway, having just finished paying the electricity bill. Zhou Mu shot him an annoyed look.
Chun Shijiu, however, eyed them both with suspicion. What happened just now? His gaze quickly locked onto the bag in You Qi’s hands. Snacks?
You Qi didn’t seem like the type to eat this stuff…
Chun Shijiu couldn’t help but glance at You Qi in confusion. He didn’t understand…
You Qi, on the other hand, remained expressionless, making it impossible to guess his thoughts.
Then, as if confirming Chun Shijiu’s suspicions, Zhou Mu cheerfully accepted the entire bag of snacks. “Thanks! I got it.”
He had just taken two steps when You Qi scooped him up—snacks and all—effortlessly carrying him. “I’ll do it, it’s a bit heavy.” His tone was calm.
Chun Shijiu: “……???”
护门草：“XXXX看XX什么看啊傻X，没看过校园文明之星帮助同学？”
Guardian Grass: “What the hell are you looking at, dumbass? Never seen a Campus Model Citizen helping a fellow student?”
Chun Shijiu: “………………”
…You Qi has literally never won that title before, has he?!
The next morning, there were no classes. Zhou Mu slept in until ten. You Qi had apparently gone to class already. Stretching, Zhou Mu got up, brushed his teeth, and opened his cupboard. Inside, the snacks were neatly stacked.
Leaning against the cabinet, he casually munched on them, tossing the wrappers into a trash bag as he went.
Some snacks were delicious. Some were just okay. Some were barely edible…
Ding!
A WeChat notification.
Zhou Mu swiped his phone open with one hand and saw a series of voice messages from Tian Qi, his little elementary schooler acquaintance. Each message was a full sixty seconds long—intimidating. Why do kids have so much to say?
He clicked play.
Tian Qi: “Xiao Mu, I successfully defeated my competition and was elected as the class president of Year 1, Class 3! Just letting everyone know!”
Tian Qi: “But I’m really disappointed. I suggested to the homeroom teacher that since I won, we should all have a celebratory meal at the cafeteria—my treat. But the teacher refused and even laughed! Sigh, I don’t get it.”
Zhou Mu wiped the crumbs off his fingers. “Why? It’s just a meal. And the cafeteria food is great.”
“Exactly, exactly!” Tian Qi’s voice was even more indignant, carrying the grievances of a child. “All I wanted was to hold a Burning Tail Feast in the cafeteria!”
Zhou Mu blinked. “Burning Tail Feast? You mean like grilled fish?”
He felt a little embarrassed—why did an elementary schooler know something he didn’t? Was it some kind of demon clan tradition?
Tian Qi sent him a screenshot explaining:
In ancient times, scholars who became officials or received promotions would host a grand banquet to celebrate with friends and colleagues. It is said that when a carp leaps over the Dragon Gate, heavenly fire burns its tail. Thus, this feast became known as the ‘Burning Tail Feast.’
…No wonder the homeroom teacher not only rejected the idea but also laughed.
Tian Qi: “I just wanted to celebrate my major life event! What’s wrong with that?! The teacher said I was being excessive, and even my mom told me to wait until I become a student council officer. Xiao Mu, do you think that’s fair?”
Zhou Mu sighed and said with great wisdom, “First, tell me—how many dishes are in a Burning Tail Feast?”
The author has something to say:
You Qi: Frustrated. Can’t bite (kiss).
![Poor Little Thing Reborn as a Spoiled Child [ABO]](https://www.freenovels.net/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/529280897e9ecfdd9f221749897bd3c6.jpeg "Poor Little Thing Reborn as a Spoiled Child [ABO]")
