PSMD – Chapter 19

Shen Ningruo’s purpose in coming to Xicheng had changed. Initially, she just wanted to observe Qiu Yang’s situation, but unexpectedly, she got herself involved physically. Perhaps “involved” isn’t the right word, because she used the wrong approach from the start, leading Qiu Yang to misunderstand and think she was just in Xicheng for a casual encounter.

But it didn’t matter.

Shen Ningruo enjoyed it herself; sleeping with Qiu Yang made her very happy, and her sleep quality improved. However, as they spent more time together, Shen Ningruo felt she might be able to serve a greater purpose. She knew she was being used by Qiu Yang, and she was happy to be, so she wanted to help Qiu Yang move on from the sadness of her breakup. This might be out of… kindness?

She had never been this kind-hearted before.

Shen Ningruo decided to view this thought as a form of gratitude for Qiu Yang’s body.

When they arrived at the bar, she saw Qiu Yang constantly looking at the girl on stage, which made her feel uncomfortable. Especially since this girl seemed to be the same type as Qiu Yang’s ex-girlfriend, whose name she couldn’t quite remember, it made Shen Ningruo even more unhappy.

She was trying so hard, was it having no effect at all?

“You’re very beautiful,” Qiu Yang’s sincere compliment pulled Shen Ningruo back to reality. Her voice was soft and gentle, with the sweet, mellow tone of a Southern girl.

You couldn’t see inside from the outside, nor outside from the inside.

The lighting was soft, and the singing still echoed.

Shen Ningruo saw Qiu Yang’s long eyelashes flutter, then heard Qiu Yang say, “But I don’t think you should look at the most beautiful person.”

“What do you mean?” Shen Ningruo narrowed her eyes slightly, her tone unconsciously carrying a hint of danger.

But Qiu Yang didn’t notice. She leaned back a little, creating some distance between herself and Shen Ningruo, then looked back at Shen Ningruo calmly and said, “Everyone has different aesthetics. Just because you’re beautiful doesn’t mean I have to look at you, and just because someone else isn’t as beautiful as you doesn’t mean I can’t look at them.”

“Besides, it’s my freedom. My eyes are on my…”

Shen Ningruo found Qiu Yang annoying and simply leaned in to silence the rest of her words.

That little mouth just kept babbling all day. On the surface, she looked like a harmless little white rabbit, but when she got serious, she was like Tang Sanzang.

Shen Ningruo couldn’t stand it and became increasingly irritated by Qiu Yang’s words.

One hand went to the back of Qiu Yang’s head, the other rested on her shoulder. Her knee pressed against the sofa, pushing Qiu Yang’s legs apart.

It was another somewhat forceful kiss.

Qiu Yang didn’t know why Shen Ningruo was angry, but she didn’t resist, letting Shen Ningruo kiss her until the aggression slowly disappeared.

Shen Ningruo calmed down, her runaway emotions brought back under control by reason.

She rubbed Qiu Yang’s head, then gently licked Qiu Yang’s lips before pulling herself away completely, standing up straight, and returning to her seat.

As if the kiss hadn’t happened, Shen Ningruo picked up the dice cup and shook it, looking at Qiu Yang with a raised eyebrow and a confident look. “Let’s start.”

Qiu Yang pursed her lips, which still seemed to hold Shen Ningruo’s warmth. She paused for two seconds before nodding. “Okay.”

The small shots were quickly finished because the back-and-forth was too fast.

The cocktails were also quickly emptied, with the loser taking a sip.

The wins and losses weren’t very distinct, roughly fifty-fifty.

Shen Ningruo rubbed her forehead. Her alcohol tolerance was average, and drinking so quickly made her feel a bit overwhelmed and dizzy.

She remembered the last time she played ring toss with Qiu Yang; they had also tied. She looked up at Qiu Yang, but now Qiu Yang was a bit blurry in her eyes. Her throat moved, and she couldn’t help but sigh, “We tied playing ring toss, and we’re tying playing dice.”

Qiu Yang was slightly better off. She had met Tao Sixian in a bar, and they had often gone drinking together over the past three years, which had built up her tolerance. Moreover, only the cocktail on the table had a higher alcohol content; the small shots of mixed drinks had little effect.

Qiu Yang listened to Shen Ningruo’s words and nodded. “Yes.”

“Want to keep going?” she asked again.

Shen Ningruo frowned, a little confused. “Are you a heavy drinker?”

“Not bad,” Qiu Yang replied somewhat modestly.

Shen Ningruo chuckled, propped herself up to sit straight, and saw Qiu Yang’s expression falter as she said, “I drank more with my ex.”

The alcohol was clearly having an effect.

At least when she was completely sober, Qiu Yang would never have mentioned “ex” to Shen Ningruo.

She said this and closed her eyes, suppressing the feeling of soreness.

Seeing her like this, Shen Ningruo frowned deeper but pretended not to know anything. “Is that the old man over sixty who’s divorced with two kids older than you?”

The singing in the bar continued. Whether this was the usual style of the place or just for today, the girl on stage started singing another sad song.

Qiu Yang didn’t answer Shen Ningruo. The fact that she could even mention something related to her ex just now meant she hadn’t controlled herself well.

She simply started singing along, her voice still soft, but every word fell into Shen Ningruo’s ears.

“You know every truth you love in books by heart, but you can’t say why you love me, you can’t say which expression of mine you admire, you can’t say when or where I ever made your heart flutter.”

Qiu Yang sang with her eyes closed. From this moment on, the image of Qiu Yang in front of Shen Ningruo was no longer blurry but very clear.

She looked at Qiu Yang’s calm expression, unsure for a moment what she was thinking.

From the moment she learned Qiu Yang was another victim and had the idea of meeting her, Yao Yao had sent her information about Qiu Yang.

In this day and age, it wasn’t difficult to find out someone’s identity.

Shen Ningruo knew Qiu Yang had been with her ex for three years and that Qiu Yang had been thoroughly hurt by her ex’s actions.

Compared to Qiu Yang’s heartbreak, her own was the difference between a plankton and a whale.

Because she didn’t love him, the hurt Guo Ming’an caused her was negligible for Shen Ningruo.

On Qiu Yang’s side, precisely because she loved her, the hurt was maximized.

Only when the song reached its end did Qiu Yang open her eyes. Her eyes were red-rimmed, but it wasn’t very noticeable in the lighting. She tried her best to keep her voice from changing and asked Shen Ningruo again, “Want to drink more?”

Shen Ningruo’s worries vanished, her full attention drawn back by Qiu Yang’s situation.

“Let’s go back,” Shen Ningruo replied. She no longer felt like drinking.

A song only lasts a few minutes. Shen Ningruo hadn’t fully recovered in that short time, but she could stand up and walk forward.

They had paid when they ordered, so now they could just leave.

The server’s “Welcome back next time” was quickly blocked by the glass door.

The sun was still scorching. Qiu Yang opened her umbrella. She took Shen Ningruo’s wrist, pulled her under the umbrella, and exhaled one word: “Hot.”

Shen Ningruo’s drunkenness was evident, her steps less decisive and somewhat heavy.

Qiu Yang was still a little worried she might fall, so she simply held the umbrella with her left hand and pulled Shen Ningruo’s wrist with her right, walking forward.

They had done the most intimate things in bed and kissed more than once outside of it, but this simple touch was something new.

Shen Ningruo was relatively thin with a small frame; Qiu Yang’s hand could circle her wrist.

But after walking a few steps, Shen Ningruo stopped cooperating.

Shen Ningruo glanced at her sideways, pulled her wrist free, and just as Qiu Yang thought she didn’t need her help, she instead grabbed Qiu Yang’s right hand and held it.

The air was hot and dry, and their clasped hands quickly became sweaty.

Qiu Yang didn’t struggle, letting Shen Ningruo hold her hand.

But for a moment, it seemed she heard her own irregular heartbeat.

She turned her head to look at Shen Ningruo’s beautiful profile for just a few seconds before looking away.

Her heartbeat didn’t subside and became clearer and clearer.

Fortunately, the distance wasn’t far, and they were almost at the guesthouse entrance. But Shen Ningruo wasn’t in a hurry to go in. She pointed to the toy store about ten meters away. “I’m going to buy something.”

Qiu Yang was no longer holding Shen Ningruo’s hand. She looked in the direction Shen Ningruo pointed; the ring toss game wasn’t set up there yet.

She replied, “Okay.”

“You go back first.”

“I’ll be back in a bit.”

Qiu Yang gave her the umbrella. “Then I’ll go in.”

She said this and entered the guesthouse. When she was almost at the corridor, she looked back; Shen Ningruo was no longer there.

She didn’t know what Shen Ningruo was going to do, nor did she intend to ask. She took out her room card from her pocket, swiped it, and entered the room.

The alcohol still had some effect. Qiu Yang sat on the sofa. She looked down at the hand Shen Ningruo had held before opening a delivery app, wanting to order some honey to mix with water.

About ten minutes later, there was a knock on the door.

She was a little surprised, thinking the delivery person had arrived so quickly, but when she opened the door, she saw Shen Ningruo.

Shen Ningruo had come to return the umbrella, but she also held a small white sheep plushie.

Shen Ningruo stuffed the plushie into Qiu Yang’s hand. Her eyes were much clearer, but she still smelled faintly of alcohol.

Her voice held a hint of a smile. “Want it?”

Qiu Yang: “…”

She had already put it in her hand, and she was still asking if she wanted it?

Shen Ningruo seemed to realize this just then. She glanced left and right; the corridor was empty.

She simply leaned in again, quickly kissed Qiu Yang on the cheek, then looked at Qiu Yang with smiling eyes. “Can’t give it away for free, right?”