Fang Yanzhou immediately nodded in agreement, his tentacles propping up his human-like head as he crawled onto Lu Jianchuan’s lap and let out two emphatic “Mm-hmm”s, clearly determined to remain an only child for life.
Fang Xingzhou reminded him, “Weren’t you the one who said you’d turn into a seahorse and give birth to ten thousand babies every two months, ensuring every human in the world carries our blood?”
Lu Jianchuan: “…”
For a brief moment, he indulged in the fantasy of being called “Dad” by countless little tentacle monsters, wavering for half a second.
Fang Xingzhou added, “Six births a year, twenty thousand each time. In less than a decade, we’d have a family of 1.2 million. In a hundred years, that would be…”
Fang Yanzhou, eager to show off its newfound math skills, shouted,“Twelve million!”
Fang Xingzhou cradled the baby’s head in his arms. “Correct. Tangtang is so smart.”
Lu Jianchuan froze for two seconds, still trying to process the number twelve million.
After a moment, he shuddered inexplicably, glanced at his lover’s slender frame, and recalled the bloody scenes from Fang Yanzhou’s memories. His heart clenched, and he declared solemnly, “Darling, I’ve decided to get a vasectomy tonight.”
Fang Xingzhou had long been itching to explore the anatomy of Lu Jianchuan’s true form.
He smiled, feigning nonchalance. “Let me do it. After all, you failed every practical exam in college.”
…
That night, Fang Yanzhou didn’t get to sleep with his parents. Daddy told him they had something very important to discuss that little ones shouldn’t hear.
So, Fang Yanzhou slept alone in the crib downstairs. As he dozed off, strange noises began drifting from upstairs.
At first, it was Lu Jianchuan, his voice low and restrained, murmuring “Zhouzhou,” “darling,” and “sweetheart” over and over, occasionally punctuated by sharp inhales.
Gradually, the sounds shifted to Fang Xingzhou—softer, muffled, only occasionally rising in volume or breaking into a hoarse cry of “Deer.”
Fang Yanzhou yawned and listened intently for a while.
Hmm… the familiar, squelchy sounds of tentacles writhing continued without end.
Reassured, he sucked on his pacifier and drifted back to sleep.
…
The next day, Fang Xingzhou unsurprisingly overslept.
By the time he came downstairs, the Lu family had already arrived with an entire team, bustling about to prepare for the full-month celebration.
The garden had been transformed, filled with vibrant flowers arranged in lush clusters, attracting bees early in the morning.
The living room was now a playground, balloons and toys scattered everywhere as Fang Yanzhou (dressed in baby clothes) and Lu Xinning crawled around, chasing a ball.
The small dining table had been replaced with an extravagant one over ten meters long, adorned with intricate tablecloths, floral arrangements, and fine wine. Twenty-two place settings were meticulously arranged, each piece gleaming.
The kitchen had been commandeered by the Lu family’s chefs, who were prepping ingredients and tools for the feast. A dozen cleaners polished every surface until it sparkled.
Lu’s father sat on the sofa, watching his grandsons play with a doting smile.
Lu Xinning suddenly grabbed one of Fang Yanzhou’s tentacles peeking out from his clothes and squealed, “Fish! Fishy! Octopus!”
Fang Yanzhou flustered, trying to retract it, but his cousin held on tight, even nibbling on it a few times. Giggling, she drooled, “Ball! Cute ball!”
Fang Yanzhou’s face turned visibly red.
His other tentacles curled shyly. “R-Really?”
Lu Xinning: “Cute! Yummy!”
She took another bite.
Mr. Lu laughed, as did Lu Jianchuan, who picked up Xinning to check her eyes again. “How about Uncle makes you squid porridge for lunch?”
Lu Xinning, still learning to speak, clutched his buttons and stammered, “Want ball… ball yummy.”
Lu Jianchuan pinched her chubby cheek, teasing, “Should we cut off the yummy ball’s tentacle to cook for you?”
Fang Yanzhou wholeheartedly agreed, tugging at his dad’s pants. “Mm! Yes!”
Lu Xinning blinked, processing the words, then her lips trembled before she burst into terrified wails. Lu Jianchuan frantically soothed her, finally placing her back beside Fang Yanzhou.
She immediately crawled over, grabbed his tentacle again, and teary-eyed, stuck it in her mouth, lost in thought.
Fang Xingzhou watched the children’s antics with a soft smile.
He headed downstairs, patted their heads, and greeted Lu’s parents.
Lu Jianchuan pulled him into a hug and planted a bold, affectionate kiss on his lips.
“Sleep well, sweetheart?” Lu Jianchuan grinned. “Seems last night’s vasectomy wasn’t very successful. Want to try again tonight?”
Madam Lu: “……”
Fang Xingzhou swiftly covered his mouth and cleared his throat, redirecting the conversation. “Aunty, what were you discussing just now?”
Madam Lu replied, “Just the final touches for tomorrow. I bought Tangtang some lovely little clothes—they’ll cover the tentacles and just show his cute head.”
Fang Xingzhou: “Thank you, Aunty.”
She hummed. “Tomorrow, just relax. Work must be tiring—leave this to us grown-ups. You and the babies enjoy yourselves.”
Lu Jianchuan, who had never worked a day in his life, beamed. “Okay! Thanks, Mom.”
Fang Xingzhou added, “Deer and I will head to the temple early tomorrow. We’ll leave the preparations to you, Aunty.”
She nodded approvingly. “That’s important. I haven’t met your mother yet—we must welcome her properly.”
They spent midday planning over a lavish family meal. Once both children dozed off in a shared crib, the decorating resumed late into the night. Lu Jianchuan’s parents stayed over—Lu Xinning, refusing to sleep with adults, insisted on sharing the nursery with Fang Yanzhou.
The house thrummed with rare liveliness, keeping Lu Jianchuan buzzing with excitement. By 5 AM, he was wide awake, shaking Fang Xingzhou urgently. “Wife! It’s dawn! Time to pick up Mom!”
Bleary-eyed, Fang Xingzhou glanced outside—still pitch black.
Then he turned—Lu Jianchuan’s glowing pupils nearly blinded him.
Sighing, he kissed the monster’s forehead and sat up.
They readied themselves quickly, splitting tasks: Lu Jianchuan stealthily cooked breakfast while Fang Xingzhou checked on the nursery. Inside, Fang Yanzhou had reverted to its jellyfish form, tendrils tangled around Lu Xinning, who hugged it back like a plush toy, drooling in deep sleep.
Fang Xingzhou tucked them in with a smile, then slipped out silently. The elder one’s room was equally still. After a hushed breakfast, the couple left without disturbing the household, driving off into the dim pre-dawn.
Lu Jianchuan hummed off-key, speeding down empty roads. In the passenger seat, Fang Xingzhou messaged guests the driver’s contact—when Lu Jianchuan suddenly blurted, casually, “Darling, my ex-handler once told me humans always marry after having kids. True?”
Fang Xingzhou smirked.
“Not always. Marriage isn’t mandatory—look at your sister and Xinning.”
Lu Jianchuan: “……”
“Besides,” Fang Xingzhou continued idly, “most marry before children. So really, the two aren’t connected.”
Lu Jianchuan’s voice tightened. “…Really?”
“Mm.”
Lu Jianchuan had intended to steer the conversation, but his train of thought derailed instantly. The tentacles coiled around the steering wheel tightened, his Adam’s apple bobbed, and the eyes on his face flickered surreptitiously toward his lover’s expression. “Then—”
His words stalled there, plunging him into an abyss of speechlessness. The fragile human-language framework he’d painstakingly constructed crumbled into foam, utterly defenseless against Fang Xingzhou’s simple “not always.”
What now?
Agonized, he stomped on the accelerator, making the engine roar.
Fang Xingzhou’s smile deepened.
Calmly picking up where Lu Jianchuan had faltered, he asked as naturally as if discussing the weather, “So, should we get married? Just you and me—nothing to do with Yanzhou.”
Lu Jianchuan froze.
He’d been desperately trying to recall the speech he’d memorized all last night, just grasping the thread of it when Fang Xingzhou’s words detonated in his mind like fireworks.
Scalding heat rushed from his toes to the crown of his head. The car cabin—not particularly small—echoed with the thunderous pounding of his heartbeat, violent as a rock drummer’s crescendo.
“You mean… marriage,” Lu Jianchuan rasped, breath ragged. “Just us two. Not about Tangtang.”
Fang Xingzhou: “Mhm. Not about Tangtang.”
Lu Jianchuan: “Darling, I thought—”
“Thought what?”
His ears burned crimson. “Nothing. Is this real?”
“It’s real.”
“Really?” he pressed again.
“Really.”
“Then after the full-month banquet today, let’s go get married! No—wait, let’s go right after picking up Mom!”
“Deer, it’s Sunday. The registry office is closed.”
“How can they be closed on Sunday…” He squirmed uncomfortably. “Then Monday? Let’s do it Monday!”
“Alright. Monday it is.” Fang Xingzhou indulged him unconditionally.
“And we need a honeymoon! We can dump Yanzhou on Mom and then—”
“A honeymoon might have to wait. The hospital’s swamped right now. After my parental leave, I’ll be buried in work until after New Year’s.”
“After New Year’s works too,” Lu Jianchuan inhaled sharply. “Pinch me, darling. It’s only 5:30 am—am I still dreaming?”
“…” Fang Xingzhou looked up from his phone, amused. “You still haven’t answered. Will you marry me?”
Lu Jianchuan nearly launched out of his seat. “YES!!!”
Fang Xingzhou: “Eyes on the road. Deer.”
Lu Jianchuan rolled down the car window, gulping in rapid breaths of air as he spent the entire journey digesting their conversation. By the time they reached the temple, his mind was still in a daze—he nearly parked the car straight into a bamboo grove.
Fang Xingzhou gave him a brief kiss and said, “We’ll discuss the wedding plans properly when we get back. There’s still much to do today.”
Though Lu Jianchuan nodded, his gaze remained unfocused, his grip on his lover’s hand so tight it seemed he wanted nothing more than to teleport straight to the civil affairs bureau, drag the staff out of their homes, and force them to process the marriage paperwork immediately.
Fang Xingzhou led his still-spaced-out husband toward the temple gates—only to look up and find Qi Yilian already standing at the entrance, as if she had known exactly when they would arrive. She watched them, fingers intertwined, with a soft smile.
Fang Xingzhou approached and bowed slightly. “Mom.”
Qi Yilian said, “I had a dream last night. When I woke, I knew you were coming.”
Fang Xingzhou paused. “What kind of dream?”
“A dream of your father. He said Tangtang is very adorable.”
Fang Xingzhou stiffened slightly.
Mother and son locked eyes—it had been years since she’d spoken of his late father in such a tone.
He drew a slow breath, then stepped forward to embrace her. “Tangtang misses you both very much.”
Qi Yilian stroked his hair, eyes closing as quiet resolve settled in her heart. “Let’s go,” she said gently.
Fang Xingzhou’s eyes grew moist. “Mn. I’ll take you down the mountain. Would you like to stay one more night? I can have Tangtang sleep with you.”
Qi Yilian shook her head. “No need. I’ll return after lunch—evening scriptures still await.”
Fang Xingzhou, already deeply content, didn’t press further. “Alright. Lunch has your favorite pine mushroom rice.”
A perfectly ordinary exchange, yet one that had eluded them for years.
Fang Xingzhou helped his mother into the car. This time, Fang Xingzhou drove while Lu Jianchuan rode in the back, keeping Qi Yilian company with an endless stream of chatter—parenting anecdotes, tales of disguising himself as a jellyfish decades ago. By the time they returned to Xiangxing Street at ten o’clock, having coaxed several laughs from her along the way, two early guests had already begun trickling into the house.
The earliest arrivals, of course, were Li Xuan and Yan Xin.
They showed up at six in the morning, bearing the most lavish and unique one-month gift for Fang Yanzhou—ten Class-E non-hazardous Special Management artifacts.
Yan Xin cradled the baby in his arms, flushed with excitement, thoroughly enchanted. He measured the child’s height, weighed him, and spent all morning chattering away about all the incredible things the Research Institute had to offer—clearly plotting to lure the baby to their labs someday.
Fang Yanzhou was dressed in a bright red sweater that perfectly concealed his tentacles, only his human little head visible as he sucked on a pacifier. Already a master of social graces despite his tender age, he hummed in obligatory agreement while Yan Xin rambled.
The moment Qi Yilan arrived, Fang Yanzhou shot out of Yan Xin’s arms, spat out his pacifier, and shouted, “Grandma!” before barreling into her embrace.
Qi Yilan froze for a heartbeat, staring at the little face that bore an uncanny resemblance to Fang Xingzhou’s—then slowly, she softened into a smile and kissed the baby’s cheek.
“Happy one-month birth, Tangtang.”
Fang Yanzhou clambered onto her shoulders, planting a slobbery kiss on her cheek with an audible “mwah,” then launched into an eager account of how much he missed her.
Lu Jianchuan, hovering behind them, gave his son a stealthy thumbs-up.
Meanwhile, Fang Xingzhou retreated to the kitchen to brew tea for their two guests.
Li Xuan accepted the tea with a smile. “We’ve already processed Xianzhou’s official credentials. He’ll have regular access to the Research Institute from now on—feel free to bring him by whenever you have time.”
Fang Xingzhou raised an eyebrow. “By ‘credentials’, you mean an actual government position with benefits?”
Li Xuan blinked, then chuckled. “Naturally. We had his position ready before he was even born.”
Yan Xin, standing nearby—as the doctor who had monitored the entire pregnancy—was visibly emotional, eyes rimmed red. “It wasn’t easy… but you’ve raised him so well. He’s fully embraced his human identity. He’ll grow into an exceptional person.”
Lu Jianchuan, remembering the turbulence of the pregnancy, matched Yan Xin’s nostalgic mood, immediately launching into a passionate exchange on parenting techniques with an inhuman infant.
Just as the discussion reached its peak, the hospital crew arrived in full force.
Qin Hongbo barged in, arms laden with gifts, yelling from a distance: “Professor! Mr. Lu! Congratulations!!”
Drs. An and Li trailed behind him: “Where’s our S-tier-SCI-worthy baby? Let Uncky take a look!”
Fang Xingzhou scooped up Fang Yanzhou and greeted his coworkers. “Tangtang? Say hello to your uncles.”
The three doctors simultaneously bent at the waist, holding their breaths as they stared unblinkingly at the baby famously gestated for nineteen months.
Ah yes, the baby allegedly born to a physiologically male “mother.”
Fang Yanzhou—who had already toured the hospital morgue at age zero—recognized each uncle perfectly, greeting them in turn: “Uncle An, Uncle Li, Uncle Qin.”
As the baby’s clear pronunciation faded, identical expressions of doting admiration bloomed on their faces. “So adorable!” “What perfect enunciation!” “He looks just like Zhou-ge!” they chorused.
The warm moment lasted precisely until collective realization struck.
Dr. An froze, his eyes gradually widening as he stared at Yanzhou, then jerked his gaze up to Fang Xingzhou.
“This…is a one-month celebration, correct?”
Fang Xingzhou smiled serenely. “Correct.”
Dr. Li blurted, “Since when can one-month-olds speak?!”
Lu Jianchuan drifted past like an ominous cloud. “Tangtang isn’t your average one-month-old. He incubated for nearly a year longer than most babies.”
The doctors: “……”
Despite the blatant violation of biological laws, they found themselves nodding along with bizarre acceptance.
Qin Hongbo: “Fair point.”
Dr. An: “Makes sense.”
Dr. Li: “…mhm.”
Another beat of silence passed before they collectively resumed cooing at the baby, their professional crises temporarily shelved.
At half past eleven, the Lu siblings arrived.
Lu Hejing made a beeline for his newborn nephew, planting several kisses on Fang Yanzhou’s cheeks before pulling out a solid gold toy car—easily weighing half a kilogram—from his gift bag. “Look what Uncle got you!”
Golden light refracted dazzlingly in the baby’s eyes, leaving him utterly spellbound as drool trickled from the corner of his mouth.
Lu Heyin clicked her tongue. “Bro you’re hopelessly tacky.” Then she produced a diamond-encrusted bracelet, dangling it before him. “Now this is something fabulous. See how it sparkles?”
Fang Yanzhou was utterly mesmerized by the glitz and glamour.
He gnawed experimentally on the gold, then nibbled at the diamonds, before snuggling against his uncle and aunt with a delighted coo—already mastering the art of flattery.
Laughter erupted throughout the living room.
With everyone present, Lu Jianchuan ushered the guests to the dining table, storing the mountain of gifts in a side room. Fang Yanzhou was enthroned at the center, a tiny crown perched adorably atop his head. The butler moved around the table, pouring red wine for each guest—with a special glass of juice prepared for Qi Yilan.
As everyone gathered around the little jellyfish-baby, Lu Jianchuan and Fang Xingzhou stood at the head of the table, raising their glasses.
“Thank you all for celebrating Tangtang’s one-month birth celebration,” Lu Jianchuan announced. “Let’s toast to his health, safety, and happiness as he grows!”
Lu’s parents: “May every day be full of joy!”
Qi Yilan: “May he flourish.”
Li Xuan & Yan Xin: “Smooth roads and boundless fortune!”
Qin Hongbo: “Top grades—ace the college entrance exams!”
Dr. An: “Alright, that’s way too ahead of time… I wish him the strength of an ox, immune to all illnesses!”
Dr. Li: “A lifetime of happiness.”
Lu Hejing: “Wealth beyond measure, never a day of want!”
Lu Heyin: “May he find the love of his life!”
Lu Jianchuan grinned. “Cheers!”
“Cheers!!”
Glasses clinked in unison as everyone downed their drinks. From the kitchen, an endless parade of gourmet dishes began rolling out, filling the air with irresistible aromas.
Fang Yanzhou’s eyes sparkled as he quietly watched everything unfold, his tiny heart pounding violently under this shower of affection. The immature divine energy within his veins surged wildly, making his whole body burn with warmth.
Fang Xingzhou scooped him into his arms and asked, “What would you like to eat?”
Excited beyond measure, Fang Yanzhou chirped, “Daddy! I want steak!”
Fang Xingzhou carefully cut the steak into bite-sized pieces, feeding him patiently while the guests dined and chatted, laughter filling the air. They swapped amusing parenting stories centered around Fang Yanzhou and Lu Xinning.
Madam Lu had prepared an extravagant feast—lunch stretched from 11:30 AM to 1:00 PM as everyone indulged in the lavish spread.
Once the meal ended, the one-month celebration officially shifted into full party mode.
Some headed to the basement for shooting games, others gathered around the mahjong table, while a few chose swimming in the pool, gossiping in the lounge, or watching TV.
Lu Jianchuan took his mother back to the temple, leaving the little ones to play happily in the living room.
The revelry continued into the evening with an open-air barbecue—wine was swapped for beer, and the party roared on until well past midnight before guests gradually trickled out.
By then, Fang Yanzhou could no longer keep his eyes open. His tiny body reverted to its true form, and he collapsed on the floor, fast asleep.
After seeing off the last guest, Lu Jianchuan and Fang Xingzhou exchanged a glance—a silent agreement passing between them.
With seamless coordination, they divided the work:
Lu Jianchuan’s eighteen tentacles whipped into a frenzy, swiftly cleaning up the aftermath.
Fang Xingzhou carried their jellyfish baby to the bath, meticulously brushing each of its tiny toothless feeding appendages before slathering the little creature in sweet-scented baby lotion and tucking it into bed.
By the time they finished handling the last stray dish, the clock had already struck 1:30 AM.
Lu Jianchuan yawned and climbed into bed, wrapping his arms around his drowsy lover.
“Wifey, don’t forget—we’re getting married on Monday,” he murmured, reaching over their slumbering child to press a kiss to Fang Xingzhou’s lips. “I know you’ll be at work, so I’ll come pick you up during my lunch break.”
Fang Xingzhou, too sleepy to open his eyes, simply hummed in agreement—casual as if they were discussing breakfast plans.
Lu Jianchuan then gently shook their soundly sleeping Fang Yanzhou. “Baby, Daddy and Papa are getting married on Monday, and you’re coming too, yes?”
Dozens of tiny, bleary eyes blinked up at him in confusion.
“Is the party over…?” The little jellyfish’s mind was still stuck at the one-month celebration, fuzzy with sleep.
Fang Xingzhou squeezed one of its tentacles. “It’s over. Did you have fun today, Tangtang?”
One by one, its eyes began drifting shut. “Mmm… happy… so much love… so happy…”
Fang Xingzhou smiled and lifted his gaze to meet Lu Jianchuan’s.
Between them, in the dim glow of the nightlight, two pairs of identical eyes held nothing but each other.
Fang Xingzhou leaned in slightly. Lu Jianchuan understood instantly—capturing his lips in a kiss, tongue coiling in like a curious tentacle, tracing the citrusy hint of toothpaste in his mouth.
Under the covers, heat gathered. Their breathing quickened, tangled. They kissed fiercely, tenderly—until their lips tingled numb and their jaws ached, until unswallowed saliva dripped onto Fang Yanzhou’s gelatinous head.
Fang Xingzhou was the first to break into laughter, forcing them apart. Chuckling, Lu Jianchuan grabbed a tissue to wipe their baby clean.
Fang Yanzhou was long gone, dreaming peacefully.
Fang Xingzhou pressed a kiss to the little monster first, then to the big one, before switching off the light. “Happy one-month, Tangtang,” he whispered. “You’ll have so much more love.”
Lu Jianchuan sandwiched their jellyfish between them, squishing its head as he kissed the same spot. “Happy one-month.”
Their body entwined beneath the blankets, they closed their eyes.
Just as sleep was about to claim him, Lu Jianchuan suddenly cupped Fang Yanzhou’s ears, leaning close to his lover.
“And you, Zhouzhou,” he breathed, words barely audible. “I love you. More than the baby. So much more, so, so, so much—”
Silence.
Assuming his wife had already drifted off, he released their child’s ears—only to hear a soft chuckle from beside him.
Fang Xingzhou reached over, sealing Fang Yanzhou’s hearing once more.
“Me too, Deer,” he murmured back.
Lu Jianchuan’s grin could have outshone the sun—like he’d swallowed an entire spoonful of honey. Satisfied, he snuggled closer, listening to the steady rhythm of his beloved’s heart.
It almost felt like twenty-two years ago again—when he, disguised as a jellyfish, had wriggled into little Fang Xingzhou’s bed, curled up on his chest, and dozed the night away to the sound of his heartbeat.
Outside, the moon climbed the treetops, spilling liquid silver over their shared warmth.
Tomorrow was going to be a perfect day.
…
——FIN——
T/N
Heads up we’re going towards the extras!