TBS Chapter 11

No matter how delicate and appetizing the dishes were, they now looked especially nauseating. Xie Ge, furious, jabbed all the food with his fork like crazy, venting his anger before sending a message to Xu Miao.

【ATM】: I feel like you’re toying with me.

【ATM】: I was originally planning to be mad at you, but now I think I’m more sad than angry.

After thinking about it, Xie Ge felt something was off.

【ATM】: Did you see me outside?

【ATM】: You thought I wasn’t good-looking, so you didn’t even come in, and just snuck away?

【ATM】: I wasn’t even sitting in a very obvious spot. The not-so-good-looking person you saw probably wasn’t me.

The message went unanswered for a long time. Calls went unanswered too. Xie Ge grew increasingly anxious, rolling around on the bed like an ant on a hot pan. But aside from repeatedly calling Xu Miao, he had no other way.

Xie Ge stubbornly called for a long time before it finally went through.

“Why are you calling so many times?”

Hearing Xu Miao’s voice, Xie Ge couldn’t hold back his tears. “I don’t want to keep crying, but I can’t control it. I’m sorry.”

“Can you tell me why you’re ignoring me? I don’t know what I did to upset you. Tell me, and I’ll agree to whatever it is. I’ll change.”

Would he agree to anything? Even breaking up?

Right now, bringing up a breakup would be the cleanest solution. But Xu Miao couldn’t say it. He could only escape again: “I already told you, my phone was on silent. I didn’t hear your calls.”

The lie was too obvious, but Xie Ge still pretended not to notice. It was already good enough that Xu Miao was willing to make excuses to soothe him. That was enough.

It wasn’t enough. How could it be enough?

Xie Ge tried to comfort himself, but he couldn’t. His unease only grew, yet he still forced himself to ask: “Then what are you doing right now, that made you not check your phone for so long?”

“…Why do you need to ask that?”

“Are you alone?”

“What if I’m not?”

“Is it a good friend?”

“…I’m drinking. Can you stop asking?”

“I won’t ask anymore. I also won’t keep calling to bother you.”

As soon as Xie Ge finished speaking, Xu Miao hung up.

The truth was, Xu Miao didn’t need to treat him this badly. Even if he let him ask, he wouldn’t dare to keep asking. Better to know nothing than to hear what he didn’t want to hear.

What was so good about drinking anyway? Xie Ge couldn’t understand, but he tried to. There was a 24-hour convenience store near the hotel. When he said he would go, he really went—five minutes later, he was at the door.

Sometimes, Xie Ge really felt the world was small. Sitting on the steps outside the convenience store, drinking, was Xu Miao again. He pretended not to see him, went inside, grabbed a random bottle of alcohol, paid, and came out.

Inevitably, he passed by Xu Miao. Xu Miao suddenly spoke: “Why do you dislike me so much?”

“You know very well.”

“I’m asking because I don’t know.”

Xie Ge was already irritated, and being cornered by Xu Miao only made it worse. “Stop pestering me. I can see what’s in your head. There’s no possibility between us. Chen Lu already packed up and got lost. Do you want to be the next Chen Lu?”

Xu Miao froze. No wonder he hadn’t seen Chen Lu since that night.

“Just because he wanted to hook up with you?” Xu Miao asked.

“Just because?” Xie Ge felt physically disgusted just thinking of what Chen Lu had said to him. “Isn’t that disgusting enough? Just the thought of two men—I’m afraid I’d throw up.”

Who would have expected that after hearing this, Xu Miao would suddenly laugh, even choking and coughing for several seconds.

Xu Miao looked up at Xie Ge, his eyes red from coughing. “Didn’t you say you’d introduce me to a psychologist? Does that still count?”

Xie Ge was stumped. In truth, he didn’t know any psychologists. He had only said that to make Xu Miao back off.

But he had already said it—no way to take it back. Anyway, every time he needed to give a number, he always gave Liang Dong’s. This time was no exception. He gave Liang Dong’s number to Xu Miao.

In fact, Xie Ge hadn’t initially discriminated against or resented the gay community. But the ones he met, one after another, kept lowering his impression.

Among those people, Xu Miao was much better. Though he crossed boundaries sometimes, it was never to an intolerable degree. So Xie Ge only said things with his mouth; he hadn’t dealt with Xu Miao the way he’d “dealt with” the others.

Xu Miao forced a weak smile. Keeping his head tilted up, he looked at Xie Ge very seriously, as if this was one of the last times they’d ever see each other. “Thank you. I’m sorry about the things before. I hope you won’t hold it against me. For the remaining days, except for necessary situations, I’ll try not to appear in front of you.”

Xu Miao really did what he said. Without his deliberate presence, in the next three days, they only saw each other once—at a full-staff meeting.

Dealing with a troublesome matter should have been a good thing, enough to lighten his mood. But Xie Ge wasn’t happy. Since that night, Xu Miao had completely ignored him, as if he’d vanished.

Xie Ge knew he shouldn’t doubt Xu Miao’s feelings. Maybe he really was just busy. After all, Xu Miao wasn’t here to play like him—he was here for work, and work was busy. It definitely wasn’t on purpose.

Xie Ge forced himself to stop overthinking. But Xu Miao had never treated him like this before, and he wasn’t used to it at all.

No matter how busy he was before, Xu Miao would never go an entire day without replying to his messages or calls. Let alone this time—it had been three whole days.

The chat history was a solid block of green. Xie Ge scrolled through the past few days’ messages again and again, but he couldn’t find a single thing he’d said wrong. He tapped on Xu Miao’s profile, and seeing that the Moments section was still there, he finally felt a little relieved.

Right under the Moments tab was the audio/video call button. Like usual, Xie Ge tapped to call. He hadn’t held out much hope, but to his surprise, the voice call actually connected, and he heard Xu Miao call his name.

“These past few days… how have you been?” Xu Miao asked.

The wave of grievance rose easily, his throat tightened, and though he wanted to speak, not a single word came out.

Xu Miao spoke again: “These past few days, I’ve thought things over carefully. There are some things…”

“I won’t agree to breaking up.” Xie Ge sniffled, his voice clearly tinged with crying. “Even if we have to break up, we’ll talk in person. You have to come to me and say it to my face, then I’ll consider whether I agree.”

“…Are you okay?”

In the blink of an eye, tears fell. Xie Ge was utterly aggrieved. “I don’t want you to care about me. You don’t want me anymore—so why are you still caring about me? Do you want me to keep misunderstanding that you still like me?”

“Why… why is it like this? Weren’t we doing just fine?”

“Is it just… just because I wanted to see you? I won’t see you anymore, okay? I promise—I’ll never bring it up again, I won’t try to test you with little tricks anymore. I’ll never bring up meeting again. I’m begging you, Xu Miao…”

But Xie Ge didn’t get the softening he was hoping for. Xu Miao didn’t change his decision for him.

“Let’s still meet,” Xu Miao said. “I’ll make sure you give up completely.”