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Chapter 48.3 – Roller-Coaster Kiss
That night, Lin Jiang had a dream.
In it, he sat alone in his empty apartment, curled up on the couch, mindlessly playing games just to pass the time.
He didn’t know how long he had been playing, but he felt so lonely that he put on his clothes and wanted to go downstairs for a walk. However, looking at the endless stream of people, people—couples hand in hand, friends chatting and laughing—he only felt more lonely.
He returned to the apartment, still alone in the cold silence.
He sent a message to Old Mao—
[Lin Jiang: Bro, come hang out. I bought a bunch of new games.]
[Old Mao: Busy right now, bro. You go ahead and play on your own.]
He texted Zeng Yuan—
[Lin jiang: Hey, are you on break? Come over to my place.]
[Zeng Yuan: Oh, I went back to my hometown.]
He then messaged Brother Yu and the others, but Brother Yu was in a relationship now and had to spend time with his girlfriend.
He tried Brother Jizhi too. He couldn’t remember exactly what the reply was, but he knew every single message was real. And he knew very clearly: this was his own past.
Day after day, year after year.
During those four decaying years at KUG, this was how he spent every single day.
In the beginning, there were still fans who remembered him. He’d smile and sign autographs, genuinely happy. But eventually, all that faded—until only the haters were left.
Loneliness followed him like a shadow, and he had no one to confide in.
He Gu once told him: “Loneliness… that’s the default state.”
He also said: “Lin Jiang, why not try holding onto me instead?”
Lin Jiang stood at the brink of hell, looking at He Gu who was extending a grand invitation to him, as if the entire world had faded, and only the two of them remained.
But, no.
His steps slowly moved backward.
When two people, equally consumed by loneliness, try to embrace, there’s no warmth to be found—they would only drag each other deeper into hell.
Lin Jiang kept running backwards, trying to escape the lonely purgatory the other had built. He ran until he was exhausted, not knowing when it would ever end.
Suddenly, the scene shifted back to the apartment. And there, on the couch, sat a small dog, its fur still damp and glistening.
The puppy turned its head at the sound, wagging its tail and smiling at him. “Captain, you’re back?”
In that moment, the lights outside the window shimmered gently, bright and beautiful.
Lin Jiang’s eyes flickered. Slowly, he began to wake from the nightmare. He looked out at the sunlit world and realized—it was already the next day.
Something heavy pressed against his chest, making it hard to breathe. He reached out and gave it a push.
“Get up.”
Shen Ju, still half-asleep, sat up.
He looked down at Lin Jiang, whom he had been sleeping on the entire night. There were red marks imprinted on Lin Jiang’s face. His fair skin looked dazed—caught somewhere between wakefulness and confusion.
Shen Ju’s breath hitched, his throat bobbing as he asked, “Last night… does it still count?”
Lin Jiang thought he was talking about making their relationship official, so he nodded.
Then he was immediately tackled onto the couch by Shen Ju, who began kissing him all over again.
At this point, the alcohol had completely worn off, and Lin Jiang was having none of it. He kicked him away calmly. “That doesn’t count.”
Shen Ju was filled with regret. “Why doesn’t it count?”
Afraid he’d pounce again, Lin Jiang kicked him even farther away. “I’m scared of pain.”
Shen Ju held onto his ankle, his breathing a complete mess.
From where Shen Ju was lying, Lin Jiang looked every bit like he was trying to tempt him—his waist soft, his clothes half-revealed his body, and the foot pressed against his chest completely exposed.
Shen Ju couldn’t take it anymore.
“Then stop seducing me,” he said, jumping up from the couch. “I’m going to take a shower.”
Watching him flee in panic, Lin Jiang couldn’t help but laugh. He sat up on the couch, still unsettled by the dream from the night before.
How strange—
Ever since Shen Ju arrived, the apartment had felt noisy, never a moment of quiet.
Lin Jiang stood and began tidying up the empty bottles from the night before. By the time he was nearly done, Shen Ju had already finished showering.
“Captain, I’Il take out the trash. You go shower.”
“Mm.”
Lin Jiang didn’t think much of it and went to take a shower. Halfway through, he suddenly remembered Shen Ju didn’t know the passcode, so he wrapped a towel around himself and stepped out to grab his phone.
Just as he unlocked it, the door clicked open.
Shen Ju walked in carrying a bag of groceries. Seeing Lin Jiang shirtless, he froze. “You’re already done?”
Lin Jiang set down his phone. “How do you know my passcode?”
Shen Ju shyly said, “I peeked while you were entering it yesterday. It’s your birthday, right?”
This damn dog—truly rotten to the core.
Lin Jiang was about to return to the shower when hurried footsteps echoed behind him. Shen Ju appeared, scooped him up effortlessly, and set him down on the cabinet by the door.
“I went downstairs to get that thing. Can we… continue?”
“Which one did you get?” Lin Jiang asked, but before he could even turn, Shen Ju pulled his face in and kissed him.
Shen Ju pressed him against the cabinet, kissing him messily, as if determined to devour him whole, his entire body radiating uncontrollable energy.
Lin Jiang had been enjoying the kiss at first, even responding lightly to him.
If it were just a kiss, Lin Jiang could tolerate it.
But unfortunately, Shen Ju’s hands weren’t behaving—they kept wandering around his waist.
Lin Jiang grabbed his wrist. “If you keep touching, my towel is going to fall off.”
Shen Ju’s breathing hitched again. He lifted his head, staring at Lin Jiang like a puppy begging for food. “I bought that stuff. It won’t hurt. Can we try?”
Lin Jiang finally saw what Shen Ju had placed on the table and realized what he’d gone out to buy.
He held back the unruly puppy and pushed him away. “I’m not done showering yet.”
“Can we continue after you shower?”
Lin Jiang turned his face away, barely suppressing a laugh. “No, go cool off outside.”
With that, he shut the door without a second thought, leaving Shen Ju to his fate.
Shen Ju had been teased since last night without getting a single bite. He was practically on the verge of losing his mind.
He buried his face in the couch, breathing in Lin Jiang’s comforting scent, and somehow, miraculously, he calmed himself down.
Honestly, just being with Lin Jiang was a blessing enough.
So, he decided to hold it in and wait.
It wasn’t like Shen Ju hadn’t held back before.
When Lin Jiang stepped out of the shower, he was a little surprised to see Shen Ju sitting obediently on the couch and playing a game.
Wiping his hair dry, Lin Jiang walked over. “What are you playing?”
“It Takes Two,” Shen Ju answered, already holding out a controller for him. “Didn’t you say you wanted to try this? I’lI play with you.”
Lin Jiang had only mentioned it casually yesterday—who knew Shen Ju would actually remember? He took the controller and casually settled onto the couch, joining Shen Ju in the game.
It must be said that the plot of this game was just perfect. As Lin Jiang played, he couldn’t help but feel the illusion that he and Shen Ju were really together, bickering with each other every day.
Shen Ju beside him seemed to have the same feeling.
Halfway through the game, he couldn’t resist moving behind Lin Jiang, leaning against his shoulder and whispering, “Lin Jiang, we will be together from now on, and we won’t quarrel.”
After saying that, he kissed Lin Jiang’s neck like an affectionate puppy.
Lin Jiang chuckled. “You’re really projecting onto the game, huh?”
Shen Ju hummed seriously. “Yeah, I am. So every time I see them argue, it makes me feel awful. I just keep thinking, no matter what, I’ll always give in to you. We’ll never fight.”
Truth be told, Lin Jiang had felt the same way while playing. Right now, all he could think about was Shen Ju.
He was losing it.
To think he’d let a puppy mess with his head like this.
The two of them cleared another level with perfect teamwork.
The puppy behind him nuzzled gently against his neck again, clinging to him as if he couldn’t bear to be apart for even a second.
Lin Jiang hadn’t told anyone this, but he actually loved being held like this. He adored the way Shen Ju’s eyes fixed on him.
It was like a loyal little dog with an owner—no matter where he was, the moment Lin Jiang showed up, his gaze would immediately follow him.
What would happen if they got even more intimate?
Lin Jiang didn’t know, but suddenly he wanted to find out.
His breath hitched slightly, and his focus on the game wavered.
Lin Jiang suddenly put down the controller, turned around, and passionately kissed the person behind him.
Shen Ju froze for only half a second before tossing his own controller aside and pulling Lin Jiang onto him.
It all happened too fast, as if only something fierce could quiet the storm inside.
The game continued playing its storyline in the background, but it didn’t matter anymore—nothing else did.
Lin Jiang wanted to strip Shen Ju off his clothes, and Shen Ju was all too willing, as if he’d been waiting for this moment all along.
This was the rule of adults: everything was about following desire and taking control.
Shen Ju kissed his neck passionately, then suddenly gasped, eyes widening in disbelief.
Lin Jiang actually bit him?!
In his imagination, Lin Jiang was the type to be gentle even in bed, so why was he biting him so hard?
Lin Jiang lifted his head, desire still burning in his gaze as he stared straight at him.
And then he lowered his head and bit him again.
Shen Ju didn’t dare make a sound. After the pain came waves of stimulation, his adrenaline spiking uncontrollably. He could no longer hold back. He grabbed Lin Jiang like a madman and carried him toward the back.
Lin Jiang asked, “Where are you going?”
Shen Ju replied, “The couch isn’t good for maneuvering.”
Lin Jiang: ?
Why was he suddenly regretting this?
But it was too late for regrets now. Yesterday, Lin Jiang could still use drunkenness as an excuse. But today? He was completely sober… and still made the first move.
Shen Ju threw him onto the bed and told him just that, “Lin Jiang, you’re the one who started this. Don’t blame me now.”
Lin Jiang had dared to do it, so he dared to own up to it. What could Shen Ju really do to him—tear him apart?
He leaned in and answered with a kiss.
And that was the final push. Shen Ju held back no longer, urgently stripping off his clothes before pressing Lin Jiang back down onto the bed.
Behind them, the screen continued playing the game’s plot, the protagonists still bickering as they faced the next challenge.
Here in the real world, things started out manageable, but it didn’t take long for Lin Jiang to regret it.
“Gentler, gentler,” he gasped out.
Shen Ju’s fingers brushed lightly over that black rose as he leaned down, gently biting Lin Jiang’s ear, his rationality had long since shattered.
Truthfully, it shattered the moment Lin Jiang kissed him first.
It was like Pandora’s box opened by Lin Jiang himself, unleashing all the passions and sufferings of the world in an unstoppable flood.
“Lin Jiang…”
Shen Ju’s voice was hoarse, his mind completely lost.
He caressed Lin Jiang like he was a rare treasure, yet he still felt unsatisfied. He lifted Lin Jiang and placed him on the gaming desk.
Shen Ju, who had been pampered all his life, started to flush red all over from the excitement.
The jade Guanyin pendant swayed on Shen Ju’s chest, its stark red-and-white contrast swinging back and forth, the contrast so obscene it made even Lin Jiang feel embarassed.
Shen Ju remained oblivious, grabbing Lin Jiang’s hand to press against his own face, lightly biting his fingers, forcing him to look at him with clear eyes.
“Lin Jiang, look at me, okay? Don’t look anywhere else. Just me…”
How could Lin Jiang have the energy to look at him? He didn’t even have the strength to lift his eyelids. His gaze drifted helplessly to the windowsill, never imagining that the gaming desk he bought could be used like this.
Now, he truly regretted it.
That damn dog Shen Ju! He really was going to tear him apart!
The morning stretched on endlessly. Eventually, Shen Ju burrowed under the covers, finally sated as he wrapped his arms around Lin Jiang, legs insistently tangled with his.
They slept for another hour before Lin Jiang, now starving, kicked him awake to make food.
Shen Ju had no choice but to get up. Wearing only shorts, he wandered around bare-chested in front of Lin Jiang, enough to make even the jade pendant blush.
At first, Lin Jiang felt a little embarrassed to stare. But then he thought, since they were already boyfriends, what was there to hold back?
So he leaned against the bed and shamelessly admired the view.
Shen Ju was shirtless, wearing only an apron. From Lin Jiang’s perspective, it looked pretty damn sexy. The more he looked, the more he felt that this man shouldn’t be on top but beneath him instead.
Lin Jiang teased him on purpose, “When do I get my turn?”
Shen Ju froze for a second before immediately untying the apron and rushing over, staring at him intently. “Now? You want to?”
Lin Jiang hooked a finger into his waistband. “I want to switch positions.”
Just the sight of Lin Jiang’s finger was enough to make Shen Ju lose his mind. Who cared who was on top—he dove forward and kissed him right away.
Lin Jiang was kissed until he was dizzy. When he realized Shen Ju was serious, he quickly pressed a hand against his chest. “You don’t mind?”
Shen Ju shook his head, burying his face in Lin Jiang’s shoulder and pulling him into a tight embrace, as if trying to meld them together. “No matter what you want, I’m willing. I have no principles when it comes to you.”
Lin Jiang was truly moved, his last trace of doubt melted away. He wrapped his arms tightly around Shen Ju’s waist, feeling for the first time that someone might actually stand by him—unconditionally.
After a while, Shen Ju asked, “So… you don’t want to anymore?”
Lin Jiang shook his head. His back was about to break. Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t move.
Shen Ju then kissed him like an eager puppy. “Then I’ll go cook. Let me know if you change your mind.”
Lin Jiang: ?
What did he just take me for?
Shen Ju wasn’t much of a cook, managing only scrambled eggs with tomatoes and stir-fried vegetables, which took him a long time to prepare.
When the dishes were finally ready, he brought them to the table—still shirtless. But when he saw Lin Jiang was already dressed, he suddenly felt self-conscious and quickly ran off to put on a shirt too.
Lin Jiang lounged lazily at the table. For some reason, whenever they touched, desire flared between them. But the moment he put on clothes, he suddenly seemed cool and untouchable.
It made Shen Ju feel like some kind of lecher[mfn]man with strong sexual desires[/mfn]. Thinking back to what they’d just done, a wave of guilt rose in his chest.
He hurriedly served Lin Jiang more food. “Here, eat more.”
Lin Jiang let out a soft hum and said nothing, but the faint smirk at the corner of his lips was enough to make Shen Ju’s soul float away.
How could someone like this exist—someone I could like so much?
It was unbelievable.
Just watching Lin Jiang eat made Shen Ju feel incredibly happy.
Lin Jiang’s fingers were so long and so beautiful. Shen Ju could never get enough of kissing them.
As he kept watching, a sudden thought popped into his head, and his ears turned visibly red. Soon, his neck flushed too.
Lin Jiang noticed his flustered expression, red-faced like a lovesick teenager.
He teased him on purpose. “What, was that your first time?”
The moment he heard those words, Shen Ju froze. The color drained from his flushed face, and the food he’d just picked up slipped from his chopsticks.
It suddenly hit him. Lin Jiang had been in a relationship before. Maybe he was comparing them.
“Y-you… were you…”
Shen Ju visibly panicked, struggling before finally forcing out, “Was it… not good for you earlier?”
Lin Jiang realized his joke had gone too far. He quickly set down his chopsticks and took Shen Ju’s hand. “No, I was just teasing. It was my first time too. Let’s just… learn together, okay?”
Shen Ju’s soul had nearly left his body from fright.
He still felt a bit shaken and quickly put down his chopsticks, crouching in front of Lin Jiang. Nervously pressing Lin Jiang’s hand against his own face, he said, “If you’re uncomfortable, you have to tell me. I heard that disharmony in this area can easily lead to breakups. It’s my first time too, and I have no experience. I was really afraid of hurting you.”
After speaking, he regretted not having studied up beforehand and could only repeatedly reassure him, “I’m a fast learner. I’ll pick it up quickly from watching some videos. Any position you want, I can do it.”
Looking at those puppy-like, sincere eyes of his—
Although he was deeply moved, Lin Jiang could only cover his face helplessly, realizing for the first time that learning aptitude could be applied in such a context. It was absurd beyond belief.
“Maybe stop watching those movies for a while,” he sighed.
He was afraid that if Shen Ju really mastered it, his waist might not survive it.
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